Going nuts on the swaps

[tulagirl]

Correct me if I am wrong, but aren't the requirements only about feedback and time posting?   How do those two things let us know they know how to run a swap:  scan wanted lists, make sure members change things and list very appropriate rules from the beginning?  These are just my thoughts and questions. I realize that you can't be responsible for everything.   I personally do okay with swaps, but I have had issues in the past so I know how it feels to get a bad box and I know how it feels to get a bad list. I also  know how it feels to have an inexperienced host who is trying so hard but some very important steps are missed.  I would have not had any way to know what I was getting into and that those things mentioned above were going to happen to me until I signed up and was in the swap and got a list.  That doesn't always help someone make a decision early if a swap is right for them.   I am concerned mainly for the newest swappers that join those types of swaps...they can be stressful and not so fun.  I hear what you are saying though on a lot of points.  Some of us could certainly notify the swap host if something is missing, many of us feel uncomfortable doing that.  The newest of swappers would not even know how to do this really.

[hathorcat]

If you check the rules listed you will see that a swap host has to submit their overview of a swap for consideration and for approval so its not just about us seeing a host's feedback, membership length and post count, we have to be assured that they know how to be a host.

The issues you raised are, as mentioned previously, the responsibility of a host but they are also the responsibility of those participating in a swap. It make sense to most that if you sign up to be part of a swap you need to engage with your host - ask questions, ask advice and if you are ever worried then speak to them. That seems like a logical part of being part of any trade or swap. Swaps have rules set up by the host, whether a newbie or an established member, these should be read and these should be enough to guide everyone through a swap. And if a person is uncertain the obvious answer is do not sign up. You would know what you are getting into with budget, shipping etc prior to a sign up - that's why hosts post the information in a starting swap thread. Yes, you may not know your partner or their wish list prior to sign up but if a participant ever felt they have been given an over ambitious swap list, then I would expect them to make the logical step of speaking to their host about the situation.

Its up to a host to guide through new members. Part of the reason swaps ask participants to have a certain level of trading history and membership is so that they can be assured the member knows how trades work, how swaps work, how the Arena works. If a host accepts new members they should be there to guide and make sure everything goes smoothly and it is also up to the new member - in fact it is up to all members - to ensure they do not get out of depth and ask the questions they should as the swap progresses.

[tulagirl]

Oh okay I have read the rules but didn't remember some of that.  You are right about the communication factor.  Very good points!!

I guess then the best thing for everyone is if you are not certain, talk with the host prior to signing up.  If your partner's wanted list is too difficult contact the swap host early so changes can be made. .Don't be afraid to do this... . and don't sign up for a swap unless you feel really comfortable you can pay the asked prices for ponies regardless of their value.  Even though the value price is what you count toward your swap total.

This is kind of how I do it. I decide based on the swap requirements if I can afford the pony amount based not on value but on what I spend knowing that value is what counts in the swap, but I still have to have the money for the ponies because they will be priced double or triple the value most times.  Usually if a swap starts at 15.00 I figure I will spend 30.00 on ponies because of the inflated prices for nice ponies.  For me I don't mind this at all. If I have signed up its because, I know I can afford that. 

You are really right it has to be at the swap level that everyone deals with issues.  I was really hoping more could be done, but I guess not really.  It seems you guys have already thought this through pretty well and I have a better understanding of how you guys that run the Arena see things when it comes to swaps.

[KaibaGirl007]

I'm pretty sure that I've overspent in all the swaps I've taken part in Nothing too extravagant though; I just like giving when I can I certainly haven't and wouldn't enter into a swap expecting my partner to exceed the minimum requirements. I have been grateful and love the things sent to me, though in one of my early swaps my partner went way overboard and of course declared the full value on the customs forms which landed me with a pretty hefty customs fee 

[tulagirl]

I'm pretty sure that I've overspent in all the swaps I've taken part in Nothing too extravagant though; I just like giving when I can I certainly haven't and wouldn't enter into a swap expecting my partner to exceed the minimum requirements. I have been grateful and love the things sent to me, though in one of my early swaps my partner went way overboard and of course declared the full value on the customs forms which landed me with a pretty hefty customs fee 

Thats not right why didn't they mark it as a gift? It was a gift.  Do you still have to pay a customs fee for a gift?  Thats just terrible.  As far as I am concerned when I send a swap box it is a gift and not a sale so that should have been marked. Yikes.

[hathorcat]

I'm pretty sure that I've overspent in all the swaps I've taken part in Nothing too extravagant though; I just like giving when I can I certainly haven't and wouldn't enter into a swap expecting my partner to exceed the minimum requirements. I have been grateful and love the things sent to me, though in one of my early swaps my partner went way overboard and of course declared the full value on the customs forms which landed me with a pretty hefty customs fee 

Thats not right why didn't they mark it as a gift? It was a gift.  Do you still have to pay a customs fee for a gift?  Thats just terrible.  As far as I am concerned when I send a swap box it is a gift and not a sale so that should have been marked. Yikes.

Yes in the UK you still have to pay customs for a gift if it is over a certain value - £40 I believe.

[ZennaBug]

I try to stay close to budget usually, since I don't have much money to spend.  But I spend my entire budget on the swap items and then go over with the extras, which are typically not included in the budget anyway.  For example, I spent my entire budget + a little extra on one of last year's holiday swaps and then added in the extras, so it was about double the set limit.  After a shipping mishap, I recovered the box and added in some more extras because I felt awful that the PO had messed up so badly.  By the end, I was about $25-30 over limit?  That's the most I've ever gone over the swap limit, but I felt it was justified in that case, since waiting until Feb/March for your Christmas present is pretty awful.  I typically try to stay within $10-15, since I don't really have a lot of spare cash these days.  The key is snagging good prices on ponies, I like to get ones that need a trip to the spa, but are in good shape behind the dirt.  That way, I can afford more.  If they don't clean up nice enough, then I try to find a different one.

*edited because I can't spell on my phone*

[tulagirl]

@Hathorcat: That is so unfair seriously. I am going to keep that in mind if I ever get a UK partner.  This is something everyone needs to know about.  I wonder if we have that issue here and I don't know about it.   Mark it worth 39.99 dollars lol 

[Aurora]

For anyone worried about what your partner thinks of your package, please don't worry. Just by being concerned that your package isn't good enough, you've proven that you care, and THAT is what makes the package awesome.

For one swap, I fretted about my package for weeks- seriously, I lost sleep- and when my partner got it, they gushed about how awesome it was. I didn't go over budget- honestly, since the ponies were from my collection I was way under budget. I only had room to include one box of candy, and it was cheap candy. Her stated favorite, but still cheap. And whenever I feel worried about the package I'm about to send, I remember that little swap and how everything was good, even though I thought it wasn't.

If you are truly worried about the swap, don't join yet. Just watch one, two, all of them. Chances are pretty good that you'll catch the fever, but you don't have to.

I'm in the Advent Swap right now, and I'm going to be close to budget. I shop the thrift stores and keep a box of ponies for trades/sales, I also have a present box to gather gifts through the year, and my partner will be getting clearance Halloween candy- hopefully the stuff without bats on it, but we all know it won't go bad in a month! I know the package will look like I overspent, but I can truthfully say I didn't.

Some valid points that have already been said, but are worth repeating:
*A box might look expensive without being expensive. You never know what people find at thrift stores!
*Homemade items really are amazing, and will touch the heart of the person opening the package. Think how much surgeons get paid to touch hearts- that swap package is WAY over budget!
*If you get spoiled, enjoy it! How often do we really get to be spoiled in real life?
*Spend what you can afford- don't blow the bank just to impress your partner. Impress them by doing the pony's hair in a really fancy way, or writing a silly little poem/drawing a picture. (I personally can't draw worth a lick and can't do more than braid pony hair, so I truly appreciate when their hair is pretty or I get pony art in a swap!) Anyone can spend money, after all!

[Saja]

I love swaps, and I am a generous person in real life, so am also generous in swaps. being in australia its just like being said before, its hard to buy within budget. But I know it will cost me more to be in a swap, and I am more than fine with that, as am I about the ridiculous shipping costs from australia. I think like what has been said, If you dont like the rules or think its too much money, then just dont join.
I ALWAYS put gift, and ALWAYS put it at $10. regardless of whats inside. Really sorry you guys have had to pay customs for gifts! thats ridiculous!

[InkyMilk]

I don't think anyone is saying that they think the minimum price set point for many swaps is too much for them, so telling them not to join on that account really isn't fair. The problem arises when it seems many people like to go way beyond the minimum, and for those who simply can't afford to go beyond what was initially agreed, are feeling like they aren't good enough. If you're following the rules of the swap and spending at least the minimum amount, I say go for it No one should expect you to pay more than what is agreed for the swap just because they spent a lot themselves. It's not about being stingy or non-generous or rude, it's about the basic fact that we don't all have a lot of disposable income (especially around the holidays), and so long, and so long as we put thought and care into the items we can afford, all should be well 

[DazzleKitty]

I can understand how someone who actually WANTS to stay in the budget due to monetary reasons can be turned off by what they see in the brag threads and definitely be deterred from joining one. More than once recently I have felt that my boxes, even though waaaay over the budget, were severely inadequate compared to the others.
But I still will continue to join swaps. Why? I really, really have fun doing them. And if you compared your boxes to others, the fun is going to be lost. Not everyone has the ability to spend what looks like maybe a couple hundred dollars on someone else (namely complete strangers), but I know when I've done a good job for what resources I have. And yes, I'd love to be able to send someone a super amazing box, but sometimes I can't invest in tons and tons of ponies on someone else because I have responsibilities. But if you have the means and want to do it, then do it! The person who receives that box is lucky. BUT, I don't think most people join a swap and expect someone to shower them with a bunch of expensive gifts. It's the luck of the draw if you get the person who really likes to spoil their partner.

So to those who are intimidated, don't be. I know most people here are kind and will be happy to receive what you give them.

Oh, and like mentioned above, they may not have spend as much as you think. They may have already had the ponies on hand or gotten an amazing deal at a thrift shop or flea market.

[elvenwine26]

I sort of feel that if your wishlist has gotten so narrow that you only need a handful of hard to finds and rares that perhaps being in a swap isn't a good idea.  It's a large part of the reason I don't swap anymore.  I've gotten some difficult wishlists in the past from all types of price ranges that would have me in a sweat trying to figure out how I would be able to make a decent box.
If you can't add extras then you can't.  One time I made a box for someone with a difficult wishlist and all it had a pony on her wishlist and it's accessory and a nice wrap job.  It didn't make for an impressive looking box but it was over the price range at that point.  I don't recall if that one went over well or not, but you try finding a good condition seapony with her float for under $15.  It's not a particularly easy task. lol

Most of the extras I gave were from the dollar store, sales items at the target, pony bits I had about the house that needed to move out, or recycled extras from past swap boxes and pony mail.  It's crazy how quickly that stuff will start stacking up.  I've even made super simple custom or added a nice pony from my trade box that was not on the list so it wouldn't just be one pony in the box.

My favorite extras that I've kept have been the handmade items though.  Someone sewed a tiny plush for me and another person made me a really nifty foam picture frame, I still have those.  I adore the amount of thought that went into them.  I think it would be radical if someone made me just a small box of tiny plushes of ponies on a want list instead of buying me the actual ponies. lol how cute would that be?  Let's have a lightly-stuffed handmade plush swap! Ship them in bubble mailers to save shipping!   Okay, I'm totally getting OT.

If you don't feel like adding extras then don't, they're not mandatory. 
As an over all rule of thumb, even if your box is simple without frills, if you would be happy receiving the box that you send out, then I think you've done your end of the deal. 

[kaoskat]

I mostly join holiday themed swaps and I usually send tons of stuff! But other than a few person-specific purchases and candy, most of my extras were bought on extreme clearance the year before! I paid around 10 cents or so for them alot of times and then saved them all year just for my future swap partner! So yeah, just because the box is huge doesn't mean they spent alot and just because it's small doesn't mean the value of it is any less either. I have loved every box I've ever gotten and alot of my favorite things were drawings and customs and once someone got these cute little boxes and painted my favorite ponies on them and another time someone made me a necklace. I love love LOVE things people make themselves. They make the boxes super special and don't cost much at all. It's really not about what you spend, it's about that little something special that says "Hey, I care about you and wanted to make you smile." And that could be something as simple as finding their favorite candy or getting/making a card with something they really like on it. Watch your partner's posts and find out what they REALLY like and send something they may not have mentioned on their form. Those are what make boxes great, not tons of money spent. Of course, if you can afford to and want to send lots of stuff, that's good too.

I know I tend to go overboard, I like to shop , but I don't expect that of my partner at all. All I expect from my partner is to do their best to make a nice box inside the swap limits/guidelines. I'm easy to make happy really. I mean xeevee filled my Christmas card from the card swap last year with glitter and I was thrilled. I opened the card and glitter got everywhere and I laughed and laughed and every time I saw the glitter afterwards (I really did manage to get it everywhere) I laughed again. See? Easy to please. So just do your best with what you have to make your box with and stop worrying. If you meet the limits, you are fine. If your partner is disappointed because they expected a huge box way over the limit, then they are the ones who messed up, not you. They need to not be so ungrateful when they got exactly what they were supposed to get. You shouldn't feel bad for that.