private swap question

[rosierjay]

I was wondering what one is supposed to do if you get a box from a private swap, and nothing is on the list you sent?
most of it looks thrown together etc.

also i'm curious about proper swap etiquette.
lets say the budget for the swap is 30$
i always count each item for what i acutally pay for them, not what they are worth.
like i try to use coupons or my company discount as often as i can so i can more in the box,
but some of my past swaps, it looks like they counted the original retail.

also for custom private swaps.
when is it a point where you should say something?
hypothetically a well know high quality customizer sends a custom that has no fbr, (so its the wrong color), hair glued to the body (not pulled through) and painted over the cutie mark.
i feel petty asking, but everytime i think of the box i get so upset. when do you say something?

i'm sure they thought they sent me a very lovely box, but i just want the custom i sent back.
would love some advice.

[shelvesofwhimsy]

I think in all swaps you're taking a risk that you may send a better box then you receive. I really only do swaps with people I know fairly well that I feel good about spending money and time to make them a box they will love! So far I haven't had any issues Everyone I've swapped with has been awesome.

I've only done one swap on here a few years ago and my box was disappointing. There were random items that I never would have asked for, so that's the last time I did that one lol.

I think it also depends on the list. If you have a list with HTF items then the chances of you getting those is very slim, but if they're common they may have just not paid close attention.

For customizing items I'm not sure if you can say anything, and I don't think you could ask for your custom back. You might be able to politely approach them and say something in regards to them not taking as much time to create something you'll want to treasure.

Either way I think maybe you should take a break from swaps

[rosierjay]

thanks.
i understand the swap part, but the custom was extremely dissapointing, they are very well known in the community so i won't say names, but they have made amazing customs before, and this was so clearly thrown together it was insulting.
i know i won't do swaps with that person again, and it will be hard to say no if i ever make a public request, but i will.
funny thing is, i'd done private swaps with them before and it was amazing... so i spent over the budget, but this time... yeah not so much. i see what they were trying to do. my pony wishlist is pretty small, i just didn't realize they only bought ponies. was expecting them to look at my other wishlists too. which they clearly didn't.

yeah its been a long time since that swap and i've been in many since then , but everytime i see the custom it reminds me. probably should just get rid of it, but i just don't know if i can do that.

[Mkia]

I was wondering what one is supposed to do if you get a box from a private swap, and nothing is on the list you sent?
most of it looks thrown together etc.

If nothing was on your list...I'd probably say something. I mean, some lists can be vague to begin with (like "anything fox related" or something), but if it has nothing to do with anything on your list, I'd be concerned :/

also i'm curious about proper swap etiquette.
lets say the budget for the swap is 30$
i always count each item for what i acutally pay for them, not what they are worth.
like i try to use coupons or my company discount as often as i can so i can more in the box,
but some of my past swaps, it looks like they counted the original retail

I'm not sure what proper swap etiquette is, but I do what you do. I go by what I pay for something (never include shipping if it's an ebay/etsy/arena item). Seems kind of shady to value something more than you spent

also for custom private swaps.
when is it a point where you should say something?
hypothetically a well know high quality customizer sends a custom that has no fbr, (so its the wrong color), hair glued to the body (not pulled through) and painted over the cutie mark.
i feel petty asking, but everytime i think of the box i get so upset. when do you say something?

I don't do customs, so I'm not the expert on this...but if it's clearly not up to standards...I think you could say something respectfully. I mean you put a lot of effort and work into your piece, and expected something on-par with that in return. I know your customs always look good (especially that G1 zecorra a while back! I love zecorra and that one was so pretty!!). So I'd hope that whatever you get in return is on par with that.

[Prideth]

This is a tough call.  I think you always run the risk of getting cruddy boxes when you're swapping with someone new, or someone who is unfamiliar with swaps.  I guess it would depend on the situation - Was the person new to the arena or have little/no experience swapping?  I know I always tend to overspend on my swap boxes so my partner gets the maximum amount of joy, but, if someone watches every penny and spends too much on this or that, they may end up sending you a box that seems 'skimpy' but to them is totally justified in the amount of money they spent.  I think it just depends on the person...  I would be rather upset if they sent me a box that had NOTHING on my wishlist, though.  I would probably bring it up politely as possible (" Oh, I wasn't expecting any of these... did I have these on my wishlist?  I hope I didn't accidentally have them on there.  I actually already own these, so I hope you don't mind if I sell them for ponies off my want list.").  Who knows?  Maybe they sent you the wrong set or something.  It could have been a total misunderstanding, so I would check in with them on what's  up.

As for the custom swap... that's a crap shoot!  Anyone is capable of making a poorly made, thrown together pony, no matter how good of work they've done in the past.  I think the best thing you can do is avoid swaps with them in the future if they're unwilling to invest time to make a quality pony for you.  There is no polite way to ask for your pony back or to call someone's work cruddy, but certainly don't lie and say you love it.  I think you just need to write this one off and call it a hard lesson learned, unfortunately.

[Loona]

aww
I was about to say you seem to have bad luck with swaps girl, but then I realised this probably is the same bad swap haunting you still. I'm so sorry to hear it has gone this bad, but I can totally understand why you are so sad and disappointed based on the details you wrote down in your first post.

I know one runs a risk when entering swaps, but I'd still be quite disappointed if I received a box similar to the one you described. not only disappointed, but I actually think the situation you have described is actually breaking swap rules. as far as I know (at least in most of the swaps, unless stated otherwise in the rules of the particular swap) a wishlist should be the main source based on which one has to buy presents to their partner, and failing to include at least one item from this list is against general swap rules (again, unless stated otherwise. since I don't know which swap this one was I don't know if it had other rules which let the participants disregard the wishlist completely. I doubt it though. I don't think much people'd enter such a swap).
I have never participated in a custom swap, but have followed some, and as far as I remember custom swaps usually require some kind of an entry portfolio showing that the applicants do have the skills needed for customising, exactly to avoid or minimise the possibility of a disappointment caused by major differences in quality. based on what you wrote the customiser in question must have passed this stage easily since they had done beautiful work before, and must have entered photos of those customs as a reference. however, because of this qualification I'd expect that in such a swap a similar quality work'd be expected from the applicants as the ones they showed upon entering the swap, so this, again, borders on being against the general swap rules to me. though this one is less determinable, since art and beauty (and thus customs) are so very subjective.

I think you should try to contact the (or one of the) swap organiser(s) about your concerns. there indeed might have been a misunderstanding, and/or in case your partner has struggled with obtaining items from your wishlist they might have been informed (that's what I'd do if I found I can't really find any of the items from my partner's list - and I know other people who have done the same in a similar situation), and it's also them who know the rules of their swap the most, and also the ones who have approved everyone to participate based on pre-defined criteria. I hope you'll be able to sort this all out!

and regarding the value issue: I am also like you, and count any item only by what I actually paid for it (excluding shipping if there was shipping involved), not based on its general value or average eBay price. to me sending a swap box is all about trying to put together a super box that'll make my partner very happy, and am going out of my way looking for bargains, sales, coupons and lucky finds in such a situation. finding a pony in a thrift store for 0.30 and sending it away alone, boxed, because it was a lucky find who is actually worth 30 (exaggerating here, but you get the point) makes no sense to me, and it is definitely not something that'll make my partner happy, and they didn't have to enter a swap for such an experience.

[xeevee]

The value thing to me is more what the item is worth more than what you paid.  I mean, if you pay $100 for something worth $20 you're really screwing your partner over.  Also, you may have something in your trade box that your partner wants, that doesn't mean you then also have to buy them extra things because you paid nothing for that item.  I will personally buy extra if I get great deals.  I once sent a moc g1 in a box because I got it for a steal.  But I never expect a box for anything other than minimum value.


I would definitely say something about the items not being on your list though.  That's quite lazy.

[Libelle]

Re wishlists:

If all participants have agreed to the swap being a wishlist swap, then all ponies must be wishlist ponies. Otherwise, any participant could randomly pick a few duplicate ponies from their collection without spending a single dollar.

Re value:

If I pay more than the real/collector's value of a pony (e.g.  20 USD instead of 15 USD), I only count the real/collector's value (i.e. 15 USD) towards the budget. If I am lucky and strike a bargain (e.g. 10 USD instead of 15 USD), I spent the money that I have saved (i.e. 5 USD) on more stuff for my partner.

Have you contacted any of the mods about the issue? I once received two swap boxes from the same person at the same time. By chance, we had been paired together in two separate swaps. Sadly, with both of the swap boxes, my experiences were very like yours. I did ask the swap forum moderators for help and was advised to allow my partner to rectify the situation, i.e. send a new box. Since I was so disappointed and distraught by the whole business, further dealings with my swap partner were not an option for me. Since I declined their offer of preparing a new swap box, I was advised to leave positive feedback for my partner which I did.

[Ringlets]

I'm so sorry you had a really bad trade experience  
I would definitely have to say something to my trade partner if I were you. They sent nothing that was on your wish list?   that's a no  no. And if you aren't happy with the quality of a customizers work /its not what you asked for then you also need to politely address that issue too IMO, but you have to be a lot more tactful with that one.

I think to understand exactly what went wrong with this and how best to advise you, would you mind sending the details to either myself or Ponylady (or both) since it was a private swap and doesn't have a swap host - and then we will do our best to help you

[sundaygirl]

The value thing to me is more what the item is worth more than what you paid.  I mean, if you pay $100 for something worth $20 you're really screwing your partner over.  Also, you may have something in your trade box that your partner wants, that doesn't mean you then also have to buy them extra things because you paid nothing for that item.  I will personally buy extra if I get great deals.  I once sent a moc g1 in a box because I got it for a steal.  But I never expect a box for anything other than minimum value.

I agree. It has happened that I overpaid slightly for swap ponies on ebay, because I had bad luck finding ponies from my partners wishlist  and started to run out of time.

I think it would be wrong to count the value of these ponies to $12-14 (as an example) only because that's what I paid for them when I know most collectors would actually value them closer to $8-10.

Then of course, if I make a great deal I usually buy something extra. But I don't think one should feel obligated to count something you happen to have at home or find at a flea market for very cheap as zero value to a swap box if it's actually something quite worthy.