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I think a lot of it depends on the people at the post office, too. Sometimes they'll automatically offer you the cheapest method, sometimes they'll quote you the fastest, etc etc. I think that the post office is definitely encouraged to push their priority services, and sometimes you have to specifically ask abut standard mail or first class. And flat rate envelopes and boxes can really hurt you if you're not careful. I always weigh and compare things first. Sometimes a flat rate box can save you money, but it can also cause you to spend WAY more than you need to if you're shipping lightweight items and they're not going very far.
Shipping is expensive. I mean, they are delivering the item directly to your door from anywhere on the planet.
NEVER ask a buyer for more money, i know, it seems to make sense but they will flip out. Its the sellers responsbility to pack and weigh it BEFORE. i cant do that, my house is too small but ive learned to eye thinsg up over they years