My mother has a rude eBay buyer... advice?

[Sunshine]

Okay so, I've been on eBay for... over a decade, and my mom has just now started to sell on eBay. I've been helping her learn the ropes, but of course, each transaction brings a new learning issue... a Nonpaying buyer lately led her to open her first NPB case (still open), but now she's having another issue with a rude buyer.

Someone made her a Best Offer on an item she had. It was a $70 item + shipping (calculated shipping based on your location, not a set price), and they offered her $50. As per what it says RIGHT there on the Best Offer page - Best Offer is for ITEM ONLY... right? Well so, she accepted their offer of $50, and then sent an invoice (actually I sent the invoice for her because she was out of town, but, I just clicked on the invoice, and sent it, didn't change anything, etc...) - and of course, it calculated in the shipping. Now this was a heavy crystal item that she sold and I think the shipping calculated itself (Priority) to be like $14. So, the total came to $64.

The buyer paid her, but sent her a nasty message saying something to the effect of, "Why the ---- did I have to pay this extra money when my offer was $50?" and she is a very... "fragile" person, nice, quiet, hates confrontation... and she's SUPER worried about what to do here. She doesn't know if she should cancel the sale for fear of "backhanded" positive feedback (she only has 2 feedback right now, both 100% positive, she's a good seller, lol I've been helping her get all her items out next day, print shipping online, calculate actual costs, etc.) but, I don't want her to do something to damage her new seller reputation...

Any advice on what she should do in this situation?

I told her personally, I'm a bit jaded as an eBayer at this point, I have zero tolerance for Nonpayers and people who don't read auctions but I try not to RESPOND rudely to them, so my advice was to message them and say something to the effect of, "I apologize for any confusion, the offer I accepted was for the item only, as per eBays Best Offer guidelines - and the shipping was calculated based on the items weight to your location, which accounted for the additional cost in the payment. Please let me know if you have any more questions or issues I can help you resolve! I want this to be a positive transaction for you. Thank you!"

What would you guys do? Thanks!

[MikeysGrrrl]

Wow, sounds like another stellar buyer on ebay

So sorry to hear that your mother being new to selling is already experiencing this

You're definitely right though, when you submit a Best Offer, you're agreeing that it is for the cost of the item and does not include shipping, you then have to hit the ok, submit button. If they were expecting shipping to be included in their BIN offer price, they should've submitted a note, which ebay provides the option to do so.

I really don't like buyers or sellers that are rude, ignorant or that curse at you in their messages. It's just wrong. Doesn't anyone have manners anymore?

I really don't know what to recommend doing, I haven't had this happen. I would think if they were that rude but when ahead and paid for it, if they did leave negative feedback, ebay might be able to remove it. But I'm not sure.

It's really great that you're there to help your mom with this

[ponylady]

Awww...that's sweet your helping your mom. 

The only thing I can think of that perhaps happened is when your buyer submitted their Best Offer they may have wrote in the box below it, that shipping would be included.  I have had it happen before on Best Offers and it caught me off guard. I am not saying this is what happened but it is a possibility.

As far as her rude email, in any event if she was unhappy to begin with about the shipping, why did she not email you before she paid? Not complain after the fact. I firmly believe that honey gets more bees than vinegar. I am sure your mom/you would have been more than happy to explain.

"I apologize for any confusion, the offer I accepted was for the item only, as per eBays Best Offer guidelines - and the shipping was calculated based on the items weight to your location, which accounted for the additional cost in the payment. Please let me know if you have any more questions or issues I can help you resolve! I want this to be a positive transaction for you. Thank you!"

This is exactly what I would write back to her. It's polite and to the point.

[Sunshine]

Thanks guys

I just don't want her to feel like she did something wrong. I'm planning on going over to check out everything but from my end, when I view the auction, it's showing me a shipping price calculated, not free shipping. I think I will just tell my mom, write that message, get it shipped out tomorrow (aka 1 day shipping - Priority mail) - send it quickly, safely, and there's not much else you can do...

Yeah it's sad that out of all of like 7 transactions she's done, only 2 have left feedback, and there's been 1 nonpayer, and then this person. Good odds of how eBay buyers are huh? Bleh!

[Stormy31685]

It is more or less up to your mom.  I believe under the new rules concerning feedback for eBay sellers that any neutral or negative feedback left by the buyer in this case would be removed by eBay.  However, before you take my word to heart, call eBay and ask to be 100%.  I can say with certainty that I have recently had such feedback removed by eBay because it was left over shipping costs.

Best of luck to you and your mom!

[Ringlets]

"I apologize for any confusion, the offer I accepted was for the item only, as per eBays Best Offer guidelines - and the shipping was calculated based on the items weight to your location, which accounted for the additional cost in the payment. Please let me know if you have any more questions or issues I can help you resolve! I want this to be a positive transaction for you. Thank you!"

This is exactly what I would write back to her. It's polite and to the point.

*nods in agreement* ^^   thats the kind of message I would send too. I'm sorry your mom came across another bad buyer so early in her ebay sales though. I hope things turn out better for her in the future and its good she has you to help her

[Sunshine]

Thanks all. She hasn't gotten a response, and as I mentioned - they paid PRIOR to sending the message (the timestamps show that), so, we were pretty confused as to why they would pay first and then complain, they had like over 50 feedback already so... My mom sent the item out next day, hopefully they will leave her feedback.

That's the other biggest issue she has, no one is leaving her feedback even though she's being a good seller... It's really frustrating to her!

[MikeysGrrrl]

Thanks all. She hasn't gotten a response, and as I mentioned - they paid PRIOR to sending the message (the timestamps show that), so, we were pretty confused as to why they would pay first and then complain, they had like over 50 feedback already so... My mom sent the item out next day, hopefully they will leave her feedback.

That's the other biggest issue she has, no one is leaving her feedback even though she's being a good seller... It's really frustrating to her!

That's frustrating when buyers don't leave feedback. I think of all the sales we've done on ebay, we've only received feedback for half of them. I have noticed at least with our sales, that the newbies seem to not leave feedback more often than frequent ebay users.

I don't know if anyone else has noticed a trend like that?

Hopefully they leave your mom positive feedback

[Tirac]

that is extremely rude
I'd just politely explain to them that the offer is for the item price, and shipping is a completely different thing.

[Sunshine]

Thanks guys! Yeah, she had another offer on another item and called me when she was accepting it, reading the page to me saying, "In BOLD it says Price offer is for item only!" - I'm like, "Mom it's okay, they paid, they can't leave you backhanded feedback because ebay will remove it if it's at all negative, they paid, all you can do it ship the item to them and leave it at that."

She's so worried, I just wish I could go on her account and message all the buyers and be like "LEAVE FEEDBACK!" but of course, you can't do that. I just feel bad because I mean... 2 feedbacks? Out of, now like 9 transactions? It's very hard to get started as an eBayer it seems... I know a lot of people leave feedback in bulk periodically, but some of the people she's sold to are also extremely new eBayers. For me, if I see a buyer or buy from a seller with a low feedback score (like, not %, but # of feedbacks), I always make sure to try and leave them feedback ASAP because I know they need it more than I do (since I'm at like 1000, lol)

[MiRaja]

My suggestion is to cancel the transaction, especially if your mother is just starting out.  A bad feedback now would be hugely detrimental versus way later.  The pittance of the offer isn't worth it.  Refund it and tell her you refuse to deal with rude people.  Once the money is returned, and the transaction canceled, there should be no way this witch can leave feedback.  Then block her.  Then relist.  Taking the money and shipping will only probably lead to further issue.  Trust me.  There will be something wrong.  There always is with buyers like these, which is what I learned a long time ago.

When I was still a big seller, I used to sell really expensive and collectible crap.  You ever heard of Cissy?  She's a doll that goes for $600+ and her clothes are hugely expensive.  I sold a slip for a dress to a lady for $65, and yes, just a slip, was more than worth that, and it was more than a deal, but I can't even remember what happened, but before I could ship it( I think shipping may have been the issue.  I think she wanted me to ship it immediately, and I have always had a five day handling window because I've ALWAYS been busy  I started selling on Ebay when I was 15, shhhh, and was in school, and then continued on into uni, and now I hold down a normal job on top of that.  Well, half way normal. ), she had gotten nasty about something, and I basically refunded her money, told her to buzz off and that I wouldn't be dealing with her attitude.  It wasn't worth my feedback over one stupid doll slip, and besides, it was a lesson for her that throwing a fit won't get you your way.  She lost out on a deal and being able to ever buy from me again.  Sure, people will say you lose customers.  But I don't want customers like that.  I don't want to cater to that. 

[StarGleamer]

be very careful, buyers CAN still leave feedback even if the transaction is canceled..... at least thats been my experience unless they changed that recently!!!

[Sunshine]

Well they never responded to her message so she shipped it. She just said we'll let it go from here and see what plays out..

[Tap Dancer]

Hi, Sunshine. I hope you don't mind me bumping up your thread. I was wondering what happened with this sale? Did your mom get positive feedback?

[Sunshine]

Honestly, I think she just hasn't gotten feedback, nor heard anything else, from that person.

It's so ridiculous being a new seller, she's sold over 25 items and I think has about 8 feedback. I think eBay needs to put a lot more pressure on leaving feedback...