Planning a wedding. Any advice?

[Princess-Sparkles]

My fiancé and I are planning in getting married not next year but the year after. I've planned a few things out, but it seems very daunting and honestly don't know where to start. Does anyone have any advice they'd like to give? I'd appreciate anything at the moment. ^_^

[Kiwi]

I found just browsing wedding sites and looking at the checklists helped. You've got lots of time to figure out what you'd like, and then go from there - colours, indoor/outdoor, size, etc.

[mlpfan]

make it a pony theme!
play the love is in bloom song from the my little pony wedding!

[Sarahlacewing]

I bought one of those everything you need to know about planning your wedding books.  It was nice not only because it had lists and itineraries but also because it made a nice keepsake for me at the end.  I found that my husband really didn't have many preferences.  He didn't like doing much of it.  So I told him to name anything that really mattered to him and then me and my maid of honor did the rest.  It was fun and it was more fun without making him feel like he had to weigh in on every single thing.  The biggest thing is book the church/park/reception areas early.  Most book a year in advance.  Depending on the season you won't find a good place if you wait too long.

[mlp4me]

A few thoughts...
Where are you having it? In a church/outdoors?
decorate the location-are there things they do not allow you to use?
programs?
Who's standing up with you and hubby?
Ushers?
Where are you getting your dress/tuxs from?
your garter
Marriage certificate-look into this very soon
Who's officiating
Flowers
banquet hall/place for reception?
decorate banquet hall-do you have to get your own linens/napkins for the table, etc (what will or will they not provide)
a locked box for any cards!!
Food
who are you going to invite?
invitations
getting people's addresses-get someone to help you with this process
cake!
DJ/music for reception
Hair for the big day? Get your hair done about a week before the wedding and take tons of pics so you remember how you like it!

Breathe.
If you really need more help let us know specifically, itemized lists really do help you to go through and make sure you haven't forgotten anything. It's nice to check off stuff when you're done.

[StoryDreamer]

Theres a book called DIY weddings that is awesome. I'm just eloping to NYC and having a reception in my city for family & friends.

[kaoskat]

We just had a really small wedding at my parents house. It wasn't big or fancy but it was perfect for us. I'm afraid I won't be much help. The only advice I have is, that while you should be considerate of your friends and family who are attending and helping, don't let them talk you into having things they way they want them instead of the way that is right for you and your groom. And don't sweat the small stuff. Things don't have to be PERFECT for everything to still be totally awesome.

[Eviecorn]

The very, very first thing you need to do?  RESERVE A LOCATION.  This can affect everything - your attire, your activities, even the date!  Places book up over a year in advance, so get on it!

After that?  Strength in numbers.  Enlist friends to help with decisions and second opinions.  This works out better if they're already in your bridal party.  Also, don't let people walk all over what you want - it's easy to let them do that when you're overwhelmed by so many decisions, and then later you're very unhappy or not quite satisfied with the way something is. 

Prioritize your budget.  Figure out where you can skimp and where you want to splurge.  In my opinion, people spend too much money on the dress/accessories/make-up and hair and not enough on decent photography and concessions for the guests.  However, your priorities may be the dress you have your heart set on, and you're willing to sacrifice another part of your budget for it (for example, not having a band or DJ.)

If you drink, now's not a time to suddenly quit. 

Try to have fun.  Dress shopping, cake and food tasting, and just time with your friends are some bright spots in all the hustle.

[Princess-Sparkles]

This is brilliant thank you guys, I appreciate it. I have two main things sort of planned, I'd rather have them book soonish I need to set a date though. Mlp4me that list is awesome. ^_^ I'll be using that. I'll keep this updated.

[TickledPink]

elope!!!!

[ZennaBug]

CONGRATS!!!! 

elope!!!!

  By the time my wedding rolled around, I wished that I had!  Planning is so stressful, but I'm glad I went through it all in the end.

I'd recommend joining one of those wedding websites like wedding wire or the knot.  They have really great checklists to help you keep on top of things.  I also used them to create a wedding website, which was awesome for getting information out to the guests.  Ours is actually still up a year later:  http://www.weddingwire.com/Turner2011

If you have ANY connections, use them.  Weddings get expensive really quickly.  We used a student photographer for our pictures and they were as good as any we had seen already and way cheaper.  $1500 for an engagement shoot, full wedding coverage (including getting ready shots and the reception), and a CD with the full-sized image files at the end.  The same package was over $5000 with more experienced professionals (she was also the sister of an old co-worker, so it was nice to support her).  Our cake was free because I'd worked at a cake shop (it was a $650 cake).  The DJ was another coworker and only cost $100 with all of his own equipment.  My uncle officiated the ceremony (it's super easy to get certified online to make it totally legal and it was really fun to have him there).  I bought my dress during the David's Bridal spring clearance with a coupon (lol), so it was only $450.  There's lots of ways to save.  Interestingly, flowers are not necessarily a good DIY.  We were planning on doing them ourselves, but I found a good florist who buys directly from the growers.  It turned out to be CHEAPER and way prettier to have him do all the flowers.

Catering and venue are the hardest to get around.  Our venue was over $2000 (and it was one of the cheaper ones, some can go upwards of $10k) and they REQUIRED you to choose from a list of caterers (A potluck had been sounding really tempting honestly).  Catering was just insane.  We went with a pasta bar (salad, 2 noodle choices, 3 sauces, veggies, and grilled chicken... something for everyone, including our ONE vegan guest) because it was the cheapest and had the best selection.  We skipped cocktail hour because it is outrageously expensive.  We just opened up the food tables and the bar while we took pictures and let everyone start eating without us.  Saved time and money.  It was still over $3000.

Still, the whole wedding (minus the Disney World honeymoon, which was a gift from my mothers-in-law) came in at about $8000 and was amazing.  It took a lot of work to keep that price down too.  I believe the average cost of a wedding is like $23,000 these days?  Maybe more?  Hell, I could buy a CAR for that!
GOOD LUCK! 

[kaninchen]

my wedding was exactly a month ago today. so it's all terribly fresh in my mind! my advice, for what it's worth:

- decide as quickly as you reasonably can what kind of wedding you want and what kind of bride you are. not specifics like colours or flowers. but a broad sense. are you a conventional church/reception hall? are you a garden party? are you a backyard BBQ? beach? offbeat?

- obviously be flexible with your ideas, but only to a point. i learned the hard way, after the better part of a year, that my beautiful garden wedding with tea party reception was not what my heart truly longed for. yes, it would have been lovely. but it was wrong, and i was trying to force mr kaninchin and i into a magazine spread that wasn't very "us".

being flexible allowed us to change direction entirely and have the beautiful louisiana wedding of our dreams. that we didn't even realize we'd dreamt of. 

- budget. a lot. neurotically. make spreadsheets. revisit this budget obsessively. start saving. even the most offbeat tiny wedding will end up so much more expensive than you originally planned. plan for things to be expensive, then look for deals. 

- avoid, as much as you can, anything called wedding this or wedding that. bridal anything. people will ask 3x as much for something if it's for a wedding. ie: look for photographers, not wedding photographers. catering, not wedding caterer. hair flower, not bridal headpiece.

- the wedding business is big and scary. people are crazy. magazines are helpful, but only to a point.

[melodys_angel]

Looks like you have some great advice soo far


You have alot of time, so slowly start to get organized and make up your own lists, then go from there.

I do agree on venue..thats the first thing you should sort out.  Depending ont he time of year you may be forced to bend a bit to get the place you want.

[Radiance]

Well, my husband and I spent less than $1,000 total on our wedding, lol! We got married on Halloween in a clearing in the woods beside the stream in his parents' back yard. Friends & family were enlisted to make the cake, take pictures, and play DJ. To us, the wedding was one big party and we had a blast. It was more important to us to have a once in a lifetime trip for our honeymoon, so we blew all our "wedding" money on a month in Europe. It was awesome!

The point is, do what you want to do, what is important to you! If you want a traditional wedding, go for it! If you have something a little more off beat in mind, do it! Don't let expectations from friends and family push you into doing anything you don't absolutely want to do. Decide what your priorities are and go from there. You're planning a party, so try to have a sense of fun about the whole process. Trust me, on the Big Day, you'll be in such a state you probably will only remember bits of it. Congratulations!

[Princess-Sparkles]

Thank you heaps guys for the advice it's helped a lot. I'm glad that I have a bit more insight on pricing etc. a bot a shock lol, never knew cake could cost so much. I got a wedding magazine so I'm gonna start planning this weekend.  The book has a guest list planner etc.

I appreciate the help guys!