The MLP Arena
Pony Talk => Off Topic => Topic started by: applejackbunny on March 13, 2016, 09:21:20 AM
-
Hi everypony!
I have been doing some reading about AS and much of it describes me (although I don't have a diagnosis or anything!). It would appear that I share many of the traits of people who have it including the desire to immerse myself in the world of fantasy and imagination. Apparently, this can manifest itself in toy collecting...
There is also a tendency to want to organise and categorise these collections...which again...I do, and a need to have a complete set of something...which again, we can probably all relate to on here!
I know that lots of people *without* AS are collectors too and that many of the things collectors do (such as categorising and obsessing!) are just associated with being a collector, but from what I've read, and what I know about myself and my childhood, there seems a lot more to it than that...for me anyway.
It is, apparently, much less common for girls to be diagnosed, because it's traditionally been viewed as a male condition. However, many diagnoses are missed in girls and this may be skewing the figures. So, many more girls may have it and are just better at masking it, so it goes unnoticed.
Maybe have a look into it yourselves before you reply so you know what some of the traits are, but I'd be interested to know how many of you guys are out there.
Anyone else feel that they may have some of the traits of AS?
-
I'm pretty sure I have it. It was so uncommon and looked down upon when I was young that people just didn't want to know. I have a parent, grandparents, uncles, and my brother who exhibit classic symptoms. I have several younger cousins who have been officially diagnosed. Everything in my house (including canned goods) is organized alphabetically, by category, and by date. I love reorganizing. I just went through all my ponies (2000+ now) yesterday and rebrushed all their hair.
-
I'm autistic :) and yes, lots of people are in the world of toy collecting for several reasons, such as a less exact development of having certain tastes at a certain age, organizing, and special interest fixations. If you want to look into it, I 100% recommend Amythest Schaber, aka Neurowonderful, who does Ask an Autistic videos on YT. They are the first person I watched when I was questioning, and easy to understand without any of the jargon.
You're welcome to PM me anytime with any questions too! It's a big interest of mine along with being it, so I'd likely know where to point you with lots of questions.
-
I think...one can have certain traits but not have the condition. It could be linked to soo many other things..just because you see yourself as fitting into something doesn't mean that it may be the case.
That said, if you feel you need to know for sure, talk to your doctor and see if he or she can arrange something :) Compared to 20 years ago, id assume that things ay be a bit more even.
-
I think...one can have certain traits but not have the condition. It could be linked to soo many other things..just because you see yourself as fitting into something doesn't mean that it may be the case.
That said, if you feel you need to know for sure, talk to your doctor and see if he or she can arrange something :) Compared to 20 years ago, id assume that things ay be a bit more even.
Unfortunately, doctors are overall very uneducated + outdated when it comes to education about autism, and still likely to not diagnose on the basis of odd, particular things such as being a girl or being able to make jokes. :huh:
But you're absolutely right, there's a whole spectrum of people in-between being autistic or completely neurotypical too, I think. :) Brains do all kinds of things all over the place.
-
I don't know and really, I don't care. I am who I am, the way that I am. I don't need help, treatment, or to understand myself better. I'm good with the way I am, thanks. I have plenty of other issues and it took a long time for me to stop feeling like I was broken. I've been much better since I stopped letting people tell me I was defective and I'm not going back again now by looking up random internet sites telling me all the ways they think I'm broken.
-
Im actually posting form a bit of experience. Not with aspergers per say (I know I don't have it but I fit in with every single point the OP listed) but with doctors and specialists and trying to get a positive result on something else I know I have.
It took a second opinion but it was a big fat 'yes! You most certainly have ____'
Its not the doctor that will determine it. Its the doctor that will arrange to see someone that can :) And yeah, sometimes it takes a second opinion, especially if the first one is a bit set in their ways.
-
I was diagnosed with AS when I was very very little by a neurologist, in my toddler years I was showing symptoms. My grandma always took me to see this doctor, I can remember quite well. I was told I showed symptoms of other forms of mild autism to where its still hard to pinpoint the word for the wiring of my brain so I was later diagnosed as simply "spectrum disorder". Honestly most people wouldnt know I had it unless I tell them and I never use it as an excuse IRL. Honestly I dont care all that much because I just want to be myself. I forget I have it as ive managed it pretty well growing up but honestly I still have my bouts. I get very uncomfortble and freak out if I do something out of routine, like if i dont go to certain stores certain days of the week (though im willing to travel to florida and japan!). Ive always organized my toys and even my clothes and pencil boxes ever and over again. Im also particular about certain fabrics and textures as some seem to really upset me, its not just about organizing things. I was also professionally diagnosed with synesthesia by two different doctors in my teens which could be linked to my disorder- i can literally taste and " feel" certain colors which is why I tend to go for more pastel things. Touching things like easter colors really relaxes me, especially light pink or even neon blue-purple. So many pastel ponies and bright rainbow pokemon in my bedroom LOL!
-
I have autism. Collecting things seems to come with it. My dad is undiagnosed, but I think he has autism too. We both love collecting things.
And I totally relate to wanting to organize things. I love making lists of my ponies. When I was little I liked to put the toys in toy store shelves in neat rows. In hindsight it is pretty obvious I have autism, but like you said girls often go undiagnosed. I was 15 or so when I was diagnosed.
-
I don't condone anyone using it as an excuse and anyone in the autism spectrum disorders is in no way broken. Different brains work different ways. Though I've been told I have as by a psychologist, we agreed not to record it as it really wouldn't change anything. I do object to children being put on dangerous meds for as instead of acceptance and understanding. Most people who have as whether they know it or not can function just fine in society. EVERYONE has bouts of bad times. All that randomness said
Aspies (as my aunt calls it) are just normal people. Using different sections of your brain than an 'average' person' is just fine. :P
-
Of course I was born with it but also of course while I was growing up people had barely heard of Asperger's. My own family and myself hadn't so I've only been officially diagnosed since I was 19. Make sure you get an official diagnosis like I did instead of trying to diagnose yourself. I also hate the 'term' Aspie'. =P It sounds dumb to me.
-
Of course I was born with it but also of course while I was growing up people had barely heard of Asperger's. My own family and myself hadn't so I've only been officially diagnosed since I was 19. Make sure you get an official diagnosis like I did instead of trying to diagnose yourself. I also hate the 'term' Aspie'. =P It sounds dumb to me.
I'm diagnosed with enough. :dizzy: I agree with you about the term aspirations. It sounds like an insect.
-
Wow, thanks, that's more replies than I was expecting! A few points were made which I'd like to respond to...
Firstly, I plan on trying to get a professional diagnosis and have no intentions of trying to self-diagnose. I am aware of the fact that a person may have a few traits of something, but may not actually have the thing itself...
Secondly, it isn't just a few traits! It's pretty much 90% of everything I've read that chimes completely with who I am, from the clothes I wear, the books I read, what I played with as a child, my sense of morality, the way I see the world and others...I mean, it goes on and on. There is hardly an aspect of my personality that isn't mentioned as being a trait, so, for me personally (and I stress that this is only my personal view) I would like a diagnosis as I think it will help me.
Thirdly, everyone is different and for some, 'labels' are a good and liberating thing, whereas for others, they are emphatically not. I totally get that, and respect it, but for *me* a diagnosis (label) would seem like a positive and helpful thing.
Lastly, I don't believe that Asperger's is a negative thing. On the contrary, there are many wonderful attributes and things to be admired. However, the social aspects of it have definitely impacted upon my life in a negative way and so knowing why, and being able to put a label on it, would be very helpful to me. It is also liberating to know that there are many others out there who face the same challenges (good and bad!).
Post Merge: March 13, 2016, 01:49:30 PM
I don't know and really, I don't care. I am who I am, the way that I am. I don't need help, treatment, or to understand myself better. I'm good with the way I am, thanks. I have plenty of other issues and it took a long time for me to stop feeling like I was broken. I've been much better since I stopped letting people tell me I was defective and I'm not going back again now by looking up random internet sites telling me all the ways they think I'm broken.
Ok :)
-
i was diagnosed with AS a few years back :) i would definitely look into getting a diagnosis if possible, even if it turns out you dont have it theres no harm done right? i've always had a habit of collecting things, though when i was younger it was more random things like fabric samplers and painted rocks ^^;
-
Thanks bladed, I will do : )
-
My daughter has AS and it took a long time for her to get a diagnosis for her. I was accused for many years of wanting to put a "label" on her - which annoyed me a great deal. She has found it helpful to know how and why her brain seems to work "differently" to a lot of other people.
Understanding the weird things "normal" people think and say has helped her get along much better in her life.
Girls are diagnosed so much less (at least in the UK) because girls on the autism spectrum are much more social than boys for the most part, the "classic" traits are based on the original findings of Asperger himself.
There is nothing "wrong" with anyone on the Autism Spectrum and no-one should think there is. My daughter got into one of the top universities in the UK this year, she was helped by having her diagnosis, as teachers had to help her understand what they were saying. She is very intelligent, and her different perspective is very useful to her on many occasions :) So hang in there and if your GP doesn't want to refer you - you can now refer yourself to a Psychologist and ask to get a diagnosis xx
-
I don't know and really, I don't care. I am who I am, the way that I am. I don't need help, treatment, or to understand myself better. I'm good with the way I am, thanks. I have plenty of other issues and it took a long time for me to stop feeling like I was broken. I've been much better since I stopped letting people tell me I was defective and I'm not going back again now by looking up random internet sites telling me all the ways they think I'm broken.
Having a diagnosis of AS has nothing to do with being broken or otherwise. Obviously people with ASD are not broken. Idiots are always there, with their small minds, but let's be honest about this. People judge everything. The more insecure and stupid they are, the more they point fingers at other people. This is not about what other people think, though. It's entirely about self-awareness and self-identity.
Let me move back to constructive comment.
I was diagnosed in 2005. I had had a fight with a friend in which she had said some things that had jarred, and it had been the last straw, but my family and I had been considering that it was possible for a while before that. I was 23 when I was diagnosed. I'm 34 now.
Before I was diagnosed, a lot of my life was a lot more stressful than it is now. Not that life isn't stressful, but this is just how it worked out for me. It's not the same for everyone, because ASD is not the same for everyone.
It is true that girls get overlooked in diagnosis. This is not helped by stereotypical confirmations of what ASD is promoted by things such as the Curious Incident of the Dog in the Nighttime and the patronising and ignorant idea that chaos in a cinema is an Autism Friendly space.
There is a very good book called Aspergirls. I forget who it is by. Anyhow. Back on point.
Before I was diagnosed, I blamed myself for absolutely everything. I had been bullied in the pony community by a couple of people who I now know were evil trolls, but at the time I felt it was somehow all on me. I also created misunderstandings I could not resolve. I don't doubt that I'm still sometimes tactless and that I go off on tangents of rantage - but at least now I have a word that explains it.
And that is what ASD is. It isn't a solution, it doesn't change who you are, but it is a word people outside need to understand your perspective on common sense. I'm not saying that them knowing it makes them immediately accept you, or that it's even any of their business. But knowing you have that word is more precious than I ever realised. Having that word has allowed me to work around obstacles and get to where I want to be, instead of just giving up at the first hurdle, as I did before.
Before I was diagnosed, I struggled with the ideas of work and university. I had a complete breakdown and had to leave the dorm of a university after one night. I commuted my degree and never really integrated. I had no support so I couldn't find my classrooms. I felt very isolated, except for my family and my collecting community friends.
I had other similar incidents like it, culminating in the fight that led to me really pushing to get a diagnosis.
Since then I've gone back to uni, I've worked with kids with autism, I've held a job in a public service front-line environment and enjoyed it. I'm back at uni now. I have friends here, and I am ok. The world isn't perfect, and there are a lot of frustrations. But I have a life now. And it's the life I chose and the one I want to have. So even if bits of it frustrate me still, I am okay with it this way.
Being diagnosed gave me that door to realise that there wasn't something WRONG with me. There was something DIFFERENT and now I knew what, and could take ownership of it a bit more. If you know what you're dealing with, you can strategise a little more.
So back to the collecting. As I said before, I had some issues in the pony community years back with a couple of trolls who made my life hell. Because of that, I got a bit alienated from my collection for a while. But I found that collecting gave me a footpath into getting to know other people. Going to conventions. Meeting folk.
I think that there are quite a lot of pony collectors with ASD. As someone said, though, you can have elements of it without being diagnosed. And not all places will diagnose properly. I was lucky - my area was very proactive about it at the time, and my university are the most awesome place on the planet when it comes to support. Having supported Autistic kids and advocated for them for two years, I know that it's not always that fortunate, and sometimes families intervene and feel it's a stigma. What I learned from the kids I worked with was that there were still people closing off their world, but that it was the parents who did not want to look into a diagnosis who were really creating the biggest issues for their kids going forward.
ASD is not a stigma, but imo if you have ASD and you don't acknowledge it, you are asking for trouble in your mental health future. People who go on about finding a cure, or treating it like a disease are wrong. It's none of those, but it is something that is better off known than not known in my experience. The world is stressful, tiring and often illogical. Just understanding why that is is half of the battle, at least for me, even when I'm completely fed up with it all :)
But in terms of diagnosis, only look into it if you feel that it would make a difference to your life to have that knowledge.
-
Right.
Please remember where this is posted and what the OP originally wanted.
Lets keep this civil and above all--light hearted <3
-
Exactly, melody's_angel, and thank you : ) I am not forcing anyone to do anything...not even to reply to my post if they don't want to! :lol:
-
I don't know and really, I don't care. I am who I am, the way that I am. I don't need help, treatment, or to understand myself better. I'm good with the way I am, thanks. I have plenty of other issues and it took a long time for me to stop feeling like I was broken. I've been much better since I stopped letting people tell me I was defective and I'm not going back again now by looking up random internet sites telling me all the ways they think I'm broken.
Having a diagnosis of AS has nothing to do with being broken or otherwise. Obviously people with ASD are not broken. Idiots are always there, with their small minds, but let's be honest about this. People judge everything. The more insecure and stupid they are, the more they point fingers at other people. This is not about what other people think, though. It's entirely about self-awareness and self-identity.
I think we have a bit of a misunderstanding here that I'd like to clear up before anyone else is upset by my post. I am NOT saying that anyone with any issue EVER is broken. That is absolutely NOT what I believe about others. I grew up in therapy for a myriad of mental issues and it made ME feel like I was broken and like I needed to be fixed. I do not like to feel that way. I was simply stating why I had no interest in looking up what it was to try to decide if I have the issue. It would not help me to go around looking for problems where I shouldn't, it would only make ME feel more broken. I understand I am different in plenty of other ways and I'm fine with being odd. I accepted it long ago. If it will help you, by all means look. It you have a problem, definitely get the information you need to take to your doctor and ask him or her about it. But no, I do not think anyone is broken, but I had to overcome FEELING like I was. I'm sorry if I made anyone think I thought that about them, that was not my intent at all. I was only stating my feelings about myself and my feelings about myself are rarely reflective of my feelings regarding others. I judge myself much more harshly than I do the rest of the world.
-
Wow. Timely posting. I was discussing this with my spouse recently. He keeps bringing up things that make him wonder about me. on a online test I did score far higher for atypical then neurotypical traits. My spouses test mostly neurotypical. I do question though if there is any relevance to my life at this point of getting tested? Would it help another little girl who shared my struggle through school be identified earlier? would it change my life for the better in any way? would I be wasting an experts time? My mother thinks this is not my issue. while my brother delayed in speaking and regressed at stages I spoke early and they couldn't get me to stop talking about my interests. There was no issue with regression. And, eye contact and speaking on the phone with strangers are two things I have not needed for work thus far.
I did however have a lot of issues with peers and school, any change or social situations comments littered my report cards. I was obsessive compulsive and anxious. there was something "wrong" that I didn't jump in but observed until I felt I understood the "rules" first and this was identified as "needs improvement" so feeling like I did wrong was a regular event. I organized and rowed toys rather then playing with them another "bad" thing, always living "inside her head" :pout:. at 7 I was assessed by an education expert and a psychiatrist for many weeks. I was unable to write or spell at my age level. The assumption was I couldn't read, or read below kindergarten level. I scored the highest they had for the test for a child my age for reading comprehension and level (well into high school) I was left (well my parents) with no answers and continued struggling, constantly feeling like a "bad kid". While school itself was hit and miss, things were better in high school then grade school as I went to a quirky art school and being a little socially awkward didn't make you stick out.
I have abilities that other people cannot comprehend. An example, Many years ago our 5 and 10 bills were changed. a fraudulent bill never made it through my till and I caught every single one. My boss kept trying to trick me with fakes in the back room. it was a fast paced job and the bill maybe was in hand for a second or two before being inside the till. The chance to look wasn't there. He tried to get me to explain to the staff on how to identify fakes by feel, and nobody understood how I did it, or what I meant with the examples in the meeting, I was treated as if I had some superhuman power. My OH first bought up that I was unusual when I did the same to him at a gas station. he gave me the bill from the teller and before putting it in my pocket I had it exchanged- it was off. her light showed what I told her. Fake. I am very sensitive to texture. I also still feel guilty for making my mother cry when she bought me a jacket for Christmas I just couldn't wear. Honestly, if I could I would have. the fabric and cut of the arms made my skin crawl. I get all my clothing in big garbage bags from friends and re-donate anything I simply can't stand on my body. work myself up to a haircut every two years or more. have a thing about water tickling my face so wash parts separately. Some things I have issues with, my brother is far more mellow about.
Collecting, my interests made me feel like a bit of an outsider within a group of people with the same hobby as they were "esoteric". I have versions of ponies most collectors do not consider getting as a separate example and am specific of pieces the truly correct items as accessories with a pony. I have a tomb in my ponyroom of logs of my collection and a detailed checklist I made myself. Things I commit to memory are different then collectors I have met and become close real life friends with I was called a walking ponypedia.
My brother has autism. he is classified as non verbal and honestly, he's one person I am most comfortable being around. We get along splendidly because I never interrupt or surprise him or change plans. things are explained ahead of time, not because someone told me, but I don't like it and from the meltdowns he would have with my parents I felt he didn't either.
Perhaps try an online test and bring the results to your GP is you are concerned. I just touched on a couple items that have made people ask about me who have known me well. Also speak to your parents, perhaps they have information you do not remember to bring to your doctor that would be of interest.
-
I'm not upset in any way. I just wanted kaoskat to know that not everyone thinks that way. Everyone deserves to feel what they feel.
Fantasticfirefly: I think your superpower is awesome. :)
-
. while my brother delayed in speaking and regressed at stages I spoke early and they couldn't get me to stop talking about my interests. There was no issue with regression. And, eye contact and speaking on the phone with strangers are two things I have not needed for work thus far.
I spoke at ten months. I read at 2. I added up road speed signs in my head at 4, without anyone teaching me maths. I could write at 4, too. I had a much broader vocabulary than anyone else I went to school with before I even went to school. And I have always talked a lot about stuff xD.
With HFA students and Aspie students I met, I haven't yet met one who went through any kind of regression. I think that tends to happen with more severe or non-verbal types of autism.
Communication is an issue but its an issue in different ways for different people. Girls are generally more communicative and better at mimicking, anyway - but being verbal doesn't determine yes or no with this. Especially when a lot of the diagnostic stuff is based on guys, still, and a lot of 'expert' opinions are flawed because the bulk of data has come from guys. As I said before, the Aspergirls book is worth a read, even if just a casual one. I haven't found much else that's really girl-Autistic centric...
-
I don't know and really, I don't care. I am who I am, the way that I am. I don't need help, treatment, or to understand myself better. I'm good with the way I am, thanks. I have plenty of other issues and it took a long time for me to stop feeling like I was broken. I've been much better since I stopped letting people tell me I was defective and I'm not going back again now by looking up random internet sites telling me all the ways they think I'm broken.
Having a diagnosis of AS has nothing to do with being broken or otherwise. Obviously people with ASD are not broken. Idiots are always there, with their small minds, but let's be honest about this. People judge everything. The more insecure and stupid they are, the more they point fingers at other people. This is not about what other people think, though. It's entirely about self-awareness and self-identity.
I think we have a bit of a misunderstanding here that I'd like to clear up before anyone else is upset by my post. I am NOT saying that anyone with any issue EVER is broken. That is absolutely NOT what I believe about others. I grew up in therapy for a myriad of mental issues and it made ME feel like I was broken and like I needed to be fixed. I do not like to feel that way. I was simply stating why I had no interest in looking up what it was to try to decide if I have the issue. It would not help me to go around looking for problems where I shouldn't, it would only make ME feel more broken. I understand I am different in plenty of other ways and I'm fine with being odd. I accepted it long ago. If it will help you, by all means look. It you have a problem, definitely get the information you need to take to your doctor and ask him or her about it. But no, I do not think anyone is broken, but I had to overcome FEELING like I was. I'm sorry if I made anyone think I thought that about them, that was not my intent at all. I was only stating my feelings about myself and my feelings about myself are rarely reflective of my feelings regarding others. I judge myself much more harshly than I do the rest of the world.
I am simply asking, out of curiosity, how many other fellow pony collectors feel that they may have, or know that they do have, Asperger's Syndrome, as it is entirely new to me and I feel that talking to others here would help in all kinds of ways :) No one is forcing anyone to reply to, or even read my post if they don't want to.
Post Merge: March 13, 2016, 06:18:24 PM
Perhaps try an online test and bring the results to your GP is you are concerned. I just touched on a couple items that have made people ask about me who have known me well. Also speak to your parents, perhaps they have information you do not remember to bring to your doctor that would be of interest.
Your skill with the fake notes is really interesting - thanks for that!
Yes, I took an online test and it confirmed that I have AS. I'm not sure how accurate those online tests are, so I will take it with me, but I will definitely see a professional before assuming I am AS.
As for my parents...I'm pretty sure they will be clueless about this!
-
You're absolutely right that there are positive traits to it. Those of us with Asperger syndrome tend to have a high vocabulary and be very intelligent and the thing that's our main focus (for me it's always been my art) we excel at. The heightened senses part of it that cause anxiety have made me wish I didn't have it but my husband and mom both have said that it's part of what makes me who I am and I wouldn't be me without it and they are right. I can't stand to be crowded. I need a lot of personal space and it's horrible the amount of people that don't respect another person's personal space. I am extremely sensitive to fragrances. They can cause me to feel sick and an overexposure to things like perfume or laundry detergents/cleaners have made me actually get a sore throat. Last time I used Clorox wipes to clean in my bathroom, the scent stayed for days and I ended up with strep throat. I take my headphones and mp3 player with me wherever I go because I can't stand loud noises and drowning it out with music helps. So yeah. That can make life hard and since I work with retail, those anxieties get triggered an awful lot. They're awfully good at accommodating meat work though. An official diagnosis will help people help you and it's great to hear that you're going to look into getting one. Also coming up with your own coping mechanisms for the anxieties that come with it helps too and I'm sure you already have them.
-
My therapist diagnosed me with Asperger's Syndrome a year or so after I told her I thought I might have it. At first she was positive I didn't have it but after getting to know me and some of my habits/quirks she said it sounded right. I haven't been able to see my therapist in a couple years due to no insurance and I'd really like to get a second opinion from another professional. I really want to believe I have it. I know many people do not like 'labels' but it would bring me so much peace of mind. I first heard about aspergers from an online friend many years ago that has it. When I brought it up to my family nobody took me seriously, especially my brothers. I was told that no, I'm just lazy and then they sat and made stereotypical 'retard' jokes. I've been told by my doctor that there is nothing mentally wrong with me. When she heard about my trying to get on disability she told me I just needed to get a part time job. I've wanted to reach out to others with it in the past but I've always been too nervous. I'm afraid that maybe my therapist was wrong and I don't have it or that I don't fall on the autism spectrum at all but I struggle with so many things. A lot of the most common traits I don't really relate to, though... I've heard that usually people on the spectrum have select interests while I have almost too many? I am constantly jumping from one interest to another and I am not good at being organized at all though I want to be. I can't bear to part with anything either... but there are the certain sounds and fabrics I absolutely cannot stand like others have mentioned. My hardest struggle is finding foods that I can stand to eat. Don't really know where I'm going with this but I'm glad this thread was made. ^^ I'm sorry if my post is too OT though. In regards to collecting ponies and toys my room is full of them and so is the garage.
-
See as an autistic person whose main special interest is MLP collecting I L O V E knowing that I'm not the only autistic here!! It's just so awesome!!
But yes, here I am, I was diagnosed ~3rd grade because of issues with a very specific teacher but I didn't really understand what was different about me until I was dang near 17 years old. As a kid, I knew I 'had Asperger's' because that was my diagnosis specifically and my parents always kept me informed. But it didn't mean anything to me. It was just, hey, I'm Sapphire and I have Asperger's!
When I was 16 I came into contact with older teens and adults that used the internet to talk about their lives and experiences with being autistic. It really opened my eyes that, yeah, I'm autistic. I have sensory processing issues. Sometimes I need a break from people and sit in my room so I can baby-talk my scary looking Pokemon. And that's ok! I'm very happy that happened because I feel like otherwise I'd see my situation like a curse almost. Like "no, I'm not in immediate danger or anything but I still believe that allistic = ideal." :cloud:
Lucky me I have wi-fi.
Post Merge: March 14, 2016, 01:46:38 AM
If you want to look into it, I 100% recommend Amythest Schaber, aka Neurowonderful, who does Ask an Autistic videos on YT.
Ooooh this too. ^^^^^
Amythyest is really sweet, their videos taught me a heck of a lot and helped my parents understand more too. ;)
-
I am simply asking, out of curiosity, how many other fellow pony collectors feel that they may have, or know that they do have, Asperger's Syndrome, as it is entirely new to me and I feel that talking to others here would help in all kinds of ways :) No one is forcing anyone to reply to, or even read my post if they don't want to.
I've always known there is something different about me that has given me some academic advantage but has made it hard for me to fit in and deal with change. My mom knew it too and helped me more than I can know.
The more traits I learn about, the more I think possibly yes. Likely. Hypersensitivity to perfumes is one of those traits? I didn't know that. I have that one very much.
I have been noticing since signing up for the Arena a month ago that several people with this sort of diagnosis seem to be here. I have been pondering that. It seems to make sense. I need to learn more about this.
I am grateful for this thread. I'll check out the resources posted here.
-
I am simply asking, out of curiosity, how many other fellow pony collectors feel that they may have, or know that they do have, Asperger's Syndrome, as it is entirely new to me and I feel that talking to others here would help in all kinds of ways :) No one is forcing anyone to reply to, or even read my post if they don't want to.
I've always known there is something different about me that has given me some academic advantage but has made it hard for me to fit in and deal with change. My mom knew it too and helped me more than I can know.
The more traits I learn about, the more I think possibly yes. Likely. Hypersensitivity to perfumes is one of those traits? I didn't know that. I have that one very much.
I have been noticing since signing up for the Arena a month ago that several people with this sort of diagnosis seem to be here. I have been pondering that. It seems to make sense. I need to learn more about this.
I am grateful for this thread. I'll check out the resources posted here.
Love your post. I have so much trouble communicating sometimes. >_<
AS is often mis-diagnosed as add or adhd. Especially in adults or by the narrow minded. My little brother exhibits all the symptoms. Sensitivities, lack of social understanding, and high intelligence. He taught himself how to read by just after two, writing and fourth grade math at three. He used to fall asleep each night reading scientific American magazines. I think he was five when he took apart a rotary phone and put it back together. He's a certified genius now. Yet he's just now learning how to microwave and use a toaster oven.
Had to modify because I forgot my point! He collects, too, and is rather obsessive about the electronics set up in the house.
-
My therapist diagnosed me with Asperger's Syndrome a year or so after I told her I thought I might have it. At first she was positive I didn't have it but after getting to know me and some of my habits/quirks she said it sounded right. I haven't been able to see my therapist in a couple years due to no insurance and I'd really like to get a second opinion from another professional. I really want to believe I have it. I know many people do not like 'labels' but it would bring me so much peace of mind. I first heard about aspergers from an online friend many years ago that has it. When I brought it up to my family nobody took me seriously, especially my brothers. I was told that no, I'm just lazy and then they sat and made stereotypical 'retard' jokes. I've been told by my doctor that there is nothing mentally wrong with me. When she heard about my trying to get on disability she told me I just needed to get a part time job. I've wanted to reach out to others with it in the past but I've always been too nervous. I'm afraid that maybe my therapist was wrong and I don't have it or that I don't fall on the autism spectrum at all but I struggle with so many things. A lot of the most common traits I don't really relate to, though... I've heard that usually people on the spectrum have select interests while I have almost too many? I am constantly jumping from one interest to another and I am not good at being organized at all though I want to be. I can't bear to part with anything either... but there are the certain sounds and fabrics I absolutely cannot stand like others have mentioned. My hardest struggle is finding foods that I can stand to eat. Don't really know where I'm going with this but I'm glad this thread was made. ^^ I'm sorry if my post is too OT though. In regards to collecting ponies and toys my room is full of them and so is the garage.
When my mom first introduced the idea that I might have it to me, my reaction was, "So /that's/ what's wrong with me." It does bring peace of mind. I always had felt kind of off.
-
Yikes!
I want to stress this. An online test is NOT a diagnosis! Please, go see a doctor and get them to set you up with someone that 'can' make a proper diagnosis.
It was strange..I was talking to my AS friend yesterday about this and they pointed out that a lot of similarities exist between this and a few other conditions (one of which I was officially diagnosed with).
You made me second guess myself but the best we could come up with was that the one thing I do have is soo severe that it can flip and ill get AS tendencies that are situational--including be overly sensitive to sound (ill hear things that aren't there) or smell..or wigging out because I see dirt or dust.
You also made me think about my own past. And yes, there are key triggers there...excelling at an early age (I was doing long division before grade 1) but stalling after that. Not caring. Suddenly caring once I hit highschool.
It fits, right? Not soo much--there were other factors im not getting into that made that stall happen. It could have been prevented but it wasn't...mostly due to a shy personality and a lack of caring on the schoolboards end.
A lot of things do cross over. I haven't listed what I have but theres a good chance you can probably figure it out.
Please. DO NOT think youve confirmed you have something based off of an online test. Those things are not accurate..you need an actual person to talk to you to determine a result.
-
@Koudoawaia
You sound a lot like me (although for me it's writing rather than art. I WISH I was artistic!)
I've heard that usually people on the spectrum have select interests while I have almost too many? I am constantly jumping from one interest to another and I am not good at being organized at all though I want to be.
The idea that people with ASD have one interest they fixate on 100% of the time is an urban myth. I'm not just speaking from my own experience but in the case of the students I worked with too. Even the more profoundly ASD students, who weren't Aspergers but had more complex diagnoses had more than one interest. I had a student who loved G4, but could also recite the entire script of Spongebob episodes. Another was into MLP but also well into pokemon (ironically, he designed a Pokemon Moon and Sun last year xD). In terms of my higher functioning students, they had a range of interests and they would slip between them. In my experience, I do this too. I have MLP. Jem. Various different anime fandoms. Japanese. Languages in general. Gardening. Writing. Reading. Music of varying types depending on my mood. All of these are things I feel I appreciate in technicolour, rather than just in passing.
I also agree with the fact an online test is not a diagnosis. However, there are still practicioners who claim that ASD can be/needs curing or that it doesn't exist. You have to make sure that you are being referred to someone who will consider all the details properly and clearly and give you an objective diagnosis. In my case, the specialist spoke to me and then to my family, and compiled a lot of additional data before issuing me with the written proof of having ASD.
There are a lot of people who identify as ASD even though they have no diagnosis, and this is largely because of the problems with getting diagnosed as an adult. So the online test is a starting point if you want to pursue it, but it isn't a diagnosis. Just something to think about. And for some people, that's enough.
Another interesting thing I learned while working as a support assistant in the college was how much ASD is a spectrum disorder with other conditions like dyslexia, ADHD, dyspraxia, OCD and such. They are all interrelated and show up in differing degrees in a lot of people. So someone who has a dyslexia diagnosis may have a couple of more ASD traits but not have ASD. And it does run in families, too. I also knew of a significant number of students who had multiple diagnoses of these traits. Some of them also had epilepsy in their medical history. I don't have this, but I worked with some Aspies who did. So it's worth considering that if you have a couple of traits that seem ASD but don't totally fit for you, you might want to look into the other possibilities.
It isn't something that you NEED to do unless it's important to you resolving who you are and moving forward with your life. But I just want to underscore that it's not necessarily a yes/no diagnosis and there are other potential factors that might be playing a part.
(For example, my navigation is legally recognised as so bad that I qualify to have a bus pass. My mobility is therefore legally recognised as impaired, although I am able bodied, because I am potentially able to get lost and not be able to find my way back again. This is not an Autistic trait, and I knew some ASD kids who were great at navigating and who could recite map directions with no problem. I believe it is a dyslexic and dyspraxic trait, but because it's on the spectrum, it's like having a brain buffet in which you pick a few bits and pieces from each bowl...)
-
. while my brother delayed in speaking and regressed at stages I spoke early and they couldn't get me to stop talking about my interests. There was no issue with regression. And, eye contact and speaking on the phone with strangers are two things I have not needed for work thus far.
I spoke at ten months. I read at 2. I added up road speed signs in my head at 4, without anyone teaching me maths. I could write at 4, too. I had a much broader vocabulary than anyone else I went to school with before I even went to school. And I have always talked a lot about stuff xD.
With HFA students and Aspie students I met, I haven't yet met one who went through any kind of regression. I think that tends to happen with more severe or non-verbal types of autism.
Communication is an issue but its an issue in different ways for different people. Girls are generally more communicative and better at mimicking, anyway - but being verbal doesn't determine yes or no with this. Especially when a lot of the diagnostic stuff is based on guys, still, and a lot of 'expert' opinions are flawed because the bulk of data has come from guys. As I said before, the Aspergirls book is worth a read, even if just a casual one. I haven't found much else that's really girl-Autistic centric...
Thank you for the reading suggestion. :) I will see if my library can get that book in for me.
Another interesting thing, UK may be ahead of the curve here. It was a UK article about autism and forgotten women. My spouse read it. Women with missed diagnosis as children who were diagnosed as adults and he recognized me in it and told me to read it. Before meeting my family he wanted to read what he could about autism for my brother as when I stay with family I have a ritual of repeatedly reminding my father to TELL my brother when I'll be in town ahead of time so him and I can go out and do things together. He would hear me arguing on the phone with my father about it. OH asked me if there was anything else he should know before meeting him and took it upon himself to read what he could and ask questions.
The bolded is VERY interesting. I would chalk up my issues being a visual brain, or "daydreaming" constantly. My youngest brother I have asked my mom if he was tested. I thought for years he was on the spectrum but my mom was adamant that being no regression is the reason that was impossible! She may still be right, we do come from a long line of smart but very socially awkward stock on my fathers side. :P So the possibility is there of not really having autism.
My mother had 5 kids. two from an early marriage, then us three with my father. She was always very proud of the comments she received for us two as children (myself and my youngest brother). "did your BABY say that??" both of us spoke much earlier then normal, used more complex sentences were able to read as toddlers. Her first two met normal milestones, so she was surprised with us. and we both got eaten alive in school and didn't relate to our peers for using language the other children didn't (and also generally for being "weird" for me being pale to the point of looking sickly didn't help any!). I remember kids teasing me and calling me dictionary and taunting me for using "big words". my retort was "I think the more accurate term would be thesaurus" :lookround: As you can see I wasn't exactly popular! I did fare much better then my youngest sibling, I found a decent enough system to be mostly left alone and blend, but sometimes if a teacher or student was incorrect I couldn't keep quiet!. And, my mother this is the same woman who hates the establishment for thinking my diagnosed brother had an IQ of 40 and for thinking we two were stupid or disturbed (my youngest brother had his fair share of issues.... more social and would shut down in class but could do the material flawlessly when he wasn't being tormented by his peers or teased by his teachers. Boys tended to be more physical against their target sadly. and when he couldn't take it any longer he'd hurt himself, meltdown and isolate himself. and they tried to say he was psychologically disturbed! He's fine. the amount of abuse the school allowed him to endure was criminal). when I was assessed for a LD she stared blankly at them when they were shocked at my pattern recognition scores and reading comprehension so I didn't fit any of their criteria, possibly dyslexia but not enough as I had no issues understanding written material "I could have told you that, she read years before kindergarten." and called them idiots for thinking my issue was anything other then writing or spelling. She didn't allow anyone to intervene with my youngest brother because at that point she was convinced the experts had no idea what they were doing, and would only make things worse.
You're absolutely right that there are positive traits to it. Those of us with Asperger syndrome tend to have a high vocabulary and be very intelligent and the thing that's our main focus (for me it's always been my art) we excel at. The heightened senses part of it that cause anxiety have made me wish I didn't have it but my husband and mom both have said that it's part of what makes me who I am and I wouldn't be me without it and they are right. I can't stand to be crowded. I need a lot of personal space and it's horrible the amount of people that don't respect another person's personal space. I am extremely sensitive to fragrances. They can cause me to feel sick and an overexposure to things like perfume or laundry detergents/cleaners have made me actually get a sore throat. Last time I used Clorox wipes to clean in my bathroom, the scent stayed for days and I ended up with strep throat. I take my headphones and mp3 player with me wherever I go because I can't stand loud noises and drowning it out with music helps. So yeah. That can make life hard and since I work with retail, those anxieties get triggered an awful lot. They're awfully good at accommodating meat work though. An official diagnosis will help people help you and it's great to hear that you're going to look into getting one. Also coming up with your own coping mechanisms for the anxieties that come with it helps too and I'm sure you already have them.
First. I relate to what you have written- TOO well. I also excelled at art, and if people ask how I can "see" something or visualize raw materials assembled in my head or take apart something in my head I compare it to having my very own google image search or video. If this is why I think differently, it wouldn't make me upset. and I wouldn't want to be medicated with anything. I couldn't imagine thinking like someone else without those abilities even if it would give me other perks. I do like being me.
I have a whine in WYP about fragrances and thankfully, my spouse fully understands and knows I am not trying to slight him or guilt him into leaving if I walk out of a theater or restaurant because I am ill due to a patron showering in perfume. More and more public spaces here are fragrance free thankfully.
My mom calls my "art brain" a double edged sword, so on one hand I can do things other people can't, on the other I have anxiety to deal with and if it runs out of control OCD behavior. My spouse loves that I am honest and blunt. if I tell him "unless you find a second hand pony. don't buy me a birthday present" it's exactly what I mean. he doesn't have to worry about me saying one thing and doing another. :P
-
I'm not caught up here because there's a lot of text and my energy is low on waking up, but I wanted to add that I have regression issues in my skills and 'functioning.' Though, this definitely ties into me having PTSD, + time spent working too hard to do basic stuff without enough help and/or spent trying to act neurotypical leads to burnout.
Some info on Burnout! http://neurodivergentabusesupport.tumblr.com/post/132224399785/ive-played-allistic-for-so-long-that-i-dont-even#notes (http://neurodivergentabusesupport.tumblr.com/post/132224399785/ive-played-allistic-for-so-long-that-i-dont-even#notes)
I am growing less independent over the last couple of years because I had no support for so long and my brain + body are basically just exhausted. I can't go out on my own, cook for myself, need help washing my hair most of the time etc. and most recently it's getting very hard to read difficult or long things. I had to drop out of school for now a bit ago as well to focus on recovering from burnout. >_<
Don't worry though, that isn't likely to happen unless you're in a situation for many years forcing NT behavior regularly or otherwise being treated very badly for a sustained time. (for me, all of childhood+teenage-hood.)
I may add something when I get around to reading the rest of the thread, but theres so much great discussion here! :)
-
Have to agree about it being a positive thing and how passionate we can be with art! Art and music have always been one of those things I have always been passionate and pretty decent at! I was second chair in flute/ piccolo and was part of the Gera student art exchange program! Art can really help me relax and unwind, my therapist insisted i try music as a way to manage my symptoms and i fell in love with the flute and even picked my first official band flute in fifth grade! Doubled with my synesthesia, i really relax to japanese art most of all- especially music. I literally visualize certain colors with certain notes!
-
I genuinely think we need an autistic pony club...;)
I am envious of you artistic peoples. I write. I write a lot, and I love writing. But I can't draw :-/ I have synesthesia, tho, and I connect to music a lot.
I also love Japanese too. <3. It has such a nice melodic rhythm - but I think my obsession with languages comes from that drive to communicate with the world somehow...
Hoping if I get a chance this summer to begin Mandarin or Korean...or both. I've done a little Mandarin and two of my flatmates speak it, but I want to do Korean too...
(P.S, in all the negatives with the world and autism, a nice story. My flatmates, two of them had birthdays around this week, so they had a joint party on Saturday. I don't really like parties, but they wanted me to go, so I did. It was only a small get-together. They know about my ASD, and that I dislike stuff like that. Yesterday one of them gave me a card to thank me for being there. That meant something to me - that she appreciated my effort and I appreciated her understanding.)
-
I'm not caught up here because there's a lot of text and my energy is low on waking up, but I wanted to add that I have regression issues in my skills and 'functioning.' Though, this definitely ties into me having PTSD, + time spent working too hard to do basic stuff without enough help and/or spent trying to act neurotypical leads to burnout.
Some info on Burnout! http://neurodivergentabusesupport.tumblr.com/post/132224399785/ive-played-allistic-for-so-long-that-i-dont-even#notes (http://neurodivergentabusesupport.tumblr.com/post/132224399785/ive-played-allistic-for-so-long-that-i-dont-even#notes)
I am growing less independent over the last couple of years because I had no support for so long and my brain + body are basically just exhausted. I can't go out on my own, cook for myself, need help washing my hair most of the time etc. and most recently it's getting very hard to read difficult or long things. I had to drop out of school for now a bit ago as well to focus on recovering from burnout. >_<
Don't worry though, that isn't likely to happen unless you're in a situation for many years forcing NT behavior regularly or otherwise being treated very badly for a sustained time. (for me, all of childhood+teenage-hood.)
I may add something when I get around to reading the rest of the thread, but theres so much great discussion here! :)
I'm in a bit of the same situation. My parents and I had a fight when I was 17 that ended with me leaving the house. No contact for ten years. Not a good ten years. Ended up having my daughter and I have to take care of myself so I can be the best mom possible. My parents didn't really patch things up, but she's their only grandchild. 14 concussions and all the time spent pretending to be okay, to understand, and to fit in left me pretty exhausted.
Post Merge: March 14, 2016, 02:09:30 PM
I genuinely think we need an autistic pony club...;)
I am envious of you artistic peoples. I write. I write a lot, and I love writing. But I can't draw :-/ I have synesthesia, tho, and I connect to music a lot.
I also love Japanese too. <3. It has such a nice melodic rhythm - but I think my obsession with languages comes from that drive to communicate with the world somehow...
Hoping if I get a chance this summer to begin Mandarin or Korean...or both. I've done a little Mandarin and two of my flatmates speak it, but I want to do Korean too...
(P.S, in all the negatives with the world and autism, a nice story. My flatmates, two of them had birthdays around this week, so they had a joint party on Saturday. I don't really like parties, but they wanted me to go, so I did. It was only a small get-together. They know about my ASD, and that I dislike stuff like that. Yesterday one of them gave me a card to thank me for being there. That meant something to me - that she appreciated my effort and I appreciated her understanding.)
Nice story! :) I like the club idea, too. :P I have synesthesia, too. I dance, write, and sing.
-
We had a very long discussion about this in the WYP board a while ago, and we did come to a consensus that there is a large number of us in the collecting community who are also on the autism spectrum. I do want to note, however, that it is not technically correct anymore to use the term "Asperger's syndrome" and many people who were diagnosed with Asperger's as children have been re-diagnosed later in life as being on the autism spectrum. Some people can be offended by being labeled as "Asperger's" because of the controversial history that the diagnosis has had (not to mention the controversy surrounding the man it was named after).
(P.S, in all the negatives with the world and autism, a nice story. My flatmates, two of them had birthdays around this week, so they had a joint party on Saturday. I don't really like parties, but they wanted me to go, so I did. It was only a small get-together. They know about my ASD, and that I dislike stuff like that. Yesterday one of them gave me a card to thank me for being there. That meant something to me - that she appreciated my effort and I appreciated her understanding.)
That is so sweet! My family often refuses to understand me and my social needs, even though my mother is a trained counselor with tons of reading on autism under her belt (having had autistic children) and my brother has been diagnosed with ASD. I also seem to have trouble keeping friends since they (apparently, I guess?) want me to be more social.
-
We had a very long discussion about this in the WYP board a while ago, and we did come to a consensus that there is a large number of us in the collecting community who are also on the autism spectrum. I do want to note, however, that it is not technically correct anymore to use the term "Asperger's syndrome" and many people who were diagnosed with Asperger's as children have been re-diagnosed later in life as being on the autism spectrum.
This is a personal perspective, but I am Asperger's and I identify as such. In the UK, the way in which people with autism are generally viewed has, in my opinion, taken a negative hit from this desire to respectrify (yay, new word) the condition into one broad diagnosis.
People with ASD are all different in minute and broad ways.
When the Autism Act here was passed, there was a lot of friction and protest about the omission of the term Asperger's Syndrome and it's effective removal from legal status. The NAS (National Autistic Society) here - the people I know from it, anyway - continue to deal with the term and recognise it, because Asperger's Syndrome and HFA are not the same as severe Autism and require different support needs.
My students at the college also suffered somewhat from the blanket mentality of 'autism' rather than breaking it down into what type of ASD they had. It meant that some of my not so well informed colleagues thought one rule applied to all, rather than recognising the nuances in the condition. This in spite of the fact all my students were very unique from one another.
I have yet to meet anyone in real life with Asperger's Syndrome as a diagnosis who was offended by that terminology, but I've met a lot of frustrated kids and confused adults because the separated diagnosis has disappeared. It also means things like the autism friendly screenings at cinemas now apparently apply to all of us, which they don't...and thus have created that issue of offending people with ASD by giving the impression we should be segregated from "normal people" in cinemas.
I don't see it as the name of a person but a way to differentiate a type of Autism that is different from more severe types of the condition. We are generalised a lot already, so if Aspie is no longer acceptable for whatever reason, another term needs to exist to replace it imo. (And IMO HFA is not the same thing.)
-
Any sort of mental or emotional diagnosis is looked down upon in America. That's aside from how hard it is to find someone who doesn't just want to throw meds at you.
-
My brother has been diagnosed with Asperger's, I can't remember when because I was very young at the time. He has a lot of trouble focusing and doing work he finds uninteresting, which has made school difficult for him. I don't think I have Asperger's personally even though my brother does and I am almost certain some of my other family members do too. I think I have a few of the traits though, but then again I think many people would exhibit at least a few. People with Asperger's certainly like to collect things though, my brother got inspired by my pony collection and started collecting Pokémon cards a few months ago. It has that certain appeal I guess!
-
I am envious of you artistic peoples. I write. I write a lot, and I love writing. But I can't draw :-/
and, on the flip I truly envy writing skill. :) I have the essence of how I feel or the detail, or fact I want to communicate and the effectiveness of that gets lost between my mind and pen/keyboard. like this song "I turned to look and it was gone, I cannot put my finger on it now" So I do wish I could be like my friends who could capture their feelings, or explain facts in writing in a fraction of time without the struggle. I found recently that printing out my work, cutting it up and laying it in front of me helps me to visualize better and edit. it's far from perfect though. >_< This is why I have written material for a pony blog that's been a WIP for 7+ years.
My brother has been diagnosed with Asperger's, I can't remember when because I was very young at the time. He has a lot of trouble focusing and doing work he finds uninteresting, which has made school difficult for him. I don't think I have Asperger's personally even though my brother does and I am almost certain some of my other family members do too. I think I have a few of the traits though, but then again I think many people would exhibit at least a few. People with Asperger's certainly like to collect things though, my brother got inspired by my pony collection and started collecting Pokémon cards a few months ago. It has that certain appeal I guess!
Yes, this is why I worry I would waste someone's time. I think everyone shares a few traits, or quirks in common with my diagnosed friends. I have many, and felt like I was dropped off on some alien world, but even there. Reading about the human condition is fascinating. most people on this earth deep down feel alone, misunderstood and that they fake fitting in. it's how marketers get people to spend money on crap to fit in. ;) "“Too many people spend money they haven't earned, to buy things they don't want, to impress people that they don't like.”
― Will Rogers
-
It used to be noone else in my family had it either. My second cousin's very young son was just diagnosed with it recently though. I have to admit I'm really envious of people that get diagnosed as children so they can grow up getting whatever help they may need with it. =P I hate how all the books assume that everyone gets diagnosed as children too. That is simply not so. The Asperger forums I've been on have also been an irritating disappointment because it mainly focused on children who have it and the parents of children who have it and not so much on adults who have it. Bah. I'm also fine with the Asperger 'label' or whatever. It's Aspie I have a problem with because I hate how that word sounds which is another trait; hating how certain words sound.
-
Yeah there's a good point to make too! Even though a lot of us were diagnosed with Asperger's, some of us don't identify that way anymore. Y'know, like me. It's always ok to ask.
I'm glad to have a family that understands too- my mom and I have a lot of similar diagnosis-es, so that's probably a big help. She explains pretty well to other people why I don't do well with crowds or loud people, or being social for a long time. Before I had to drop out of school she said that when I graduated, she'd tell people to send cards with money inside instead of having a full-blown party.
I was relieved. Of course that never happened but the fact that she always takes into account what *I* need instead of what's the norm is something I'll always be thankful for!
-
I have some traits...
-
Yikes!
I want to stress this. An online test is NOT a diagnosis! Please, go see a doctor and get them to set you up with someone that 'can' make a proper diagnosis.
It was strange..I was talking to my AS friend yesterday about this and they pointed out that a lot of similarities exist between this and a few other conditions (one of which I was officially diagnosed with).
You made me second guess myself but the best we could come up with was that the one thing I do have is soo severe that it can flip and ill get AS tendencies that are situational--including be overly sensitive to sound (ill hear things that aren't there) or smell..or wigging out because I see dirt or dust.
You also made me think about my own past. And yes, there are key triggers there...excelling at an early age (I was doing long division before grade 1) but stalling after that. Not caring. Suddenly caring once I hit highschool.
It fits, right? Not soo much--there were other factors im not getting into that made that stall happen. It could have been prevented but it wasn't...mostly due to a shy personality and a lack of caring on the schoolboards end.
A lot of things do cross over. I haven't listed what I have but theres a good chance you can probably figure it out.
Please. DO NOT think youve confirmed you have something based off of an online test. Those things are not accurate..you need an actual person to talk to you to determine a result.
Thanks again melodys_angel : ) Yes, this is very important and must be stressed as others already have.
I don't want anyone to get the wrong idea. I have *very clearly* stated, several times, that I have NO INTENTION of assuming that I have AS without a *formal, professional* diagnosis. I responded to another poster who suggested taking an online test, and I said I had, and that it had shown a result consistent with someone with AS. I then went on to say *I wasn't sure how accurate those online tests are* and that I would *take it with me to a professional* to have a proper diagnosis.
A few points were made which I'd like to respond to...
Firstly, I plan on trying to get a professional diagnosis and have no intentions of trying to self-diagnose. I am aware of the fact that a person may have a few traits of something, but may not actually have the thing itself...
I would like a diagnosis as I think it will help me.
Thirdly, everyone is different and for some, 'labels' are a good and liberating thing, whereas for others, they are emphatically not. I totally get that, and respect it, but for *me* a diagnosis (label) would seem like a positive and helpful thing.
Another previous post: (sorry - can't get the hang of doing quotes inside other quotes!) :)
Your skill with the fake notes is really interesting - thanks for that!
Yes, I took an online test and it confirmed that I have AS. I'm not sure how accurate those online tests are, so I will take it with me, but I will definitely see a professional before assuming I am AS.
As for my parents...I'm pretty sure they will be clueless about this!
[/quote]
Post Merge: March 14, 2016, 06:52:18 PM
We had a very long discussion about this in the WYP board a while ago, and we did come to a consensus that there is a large number of us in the collecting community who are also on the autism spectrum. I do want to note, however, that it is not technically correct anymore to use the term "Asperger's syndrome" and many people who were diagnosed with Asperger's as children have been re-diagnosed later in life as being on the autism spectrum. Some people can be offended by being labeled as "Asperger's" because of the controversial history that the diagnosis has had (not to mention the controversy surrounding the man it was named after).
This is true in America I believe, but not here in the UK. As I am new to all this, someone can correct me if I'm wrong, but I'm pretty sure I read exactly that, that they kept the phrase Asperger's Syndrome here in the UK, despite the review of the term in the US.
-
Yikes!
I want to stress this. An online test is NOT a diagnosis! Please, go see a doctor and get them to set you up with someone that 'can' make a proper diagnosis.
It was strange..I was talking to my AS friend yesterday about this and they pointed out that a lot of similarities exist between this and a few other conditions (one of which I was officially diagnosed with).
You made me second guess myself but the best we could come up with was that the one thing I do have is soo severe that it can flip and ill get AS tendencies that are situational--including be overly sensitive to sound (ill hear things that aren't there) or smell..or wigging out because I see dirt or dust.
You also made me think about my own past. And yes, there are key triggers there...excelling at an early age (I was doing long division before grade 1) but stalling after that. Not caring. Suddenly caring once I hit highschool.
It fits, right? Not soo much--there were other factors im not getting into that made that stall happen. It could have been prevented but it wasn't...mostly due to a shy personality and a lack of caring on the schoolboards end.
A lot of things do cross over. I haven't listed what I have but theres a good chance you can probably figure it out.
Please. DO NOT think youve confirmed you have something based off of an online test. Those things are not accurate..you need an actual person to talk to you to determine a result.
It may have been my quote that was misinterpreted (below). I am by no means self diagnosing or advocating calling yourself ASD from taking an internet quiz, I have gotten to the point where my life is in a good place, and I have coping methods for stress. so unless I see the relevance of pursuing a formal diagnosis (the cause of whatever it is that had been causing me difficulties in the past) I'll have quietly wonder from time to time. (usually if someone asks if I've been checked for that! hah)
Perhaps try an online test and bring the results to your GP is you are concerned. I just touched on a couple items that have made people ask about me who have known me well. Also speak to your parents, perhaps they have information you do not remember to bring to your doctor that would be of interest.
Perhaps I used country specific terminology. GP is general practitioner, so a family Doctor. Here you cannot just call and book a specialists appointment. Your Dr. would look over your information, ask you further questions and refer you to specialists for diagnosis if they think that is a possible track. ;)
-
Ah, America how I love thee. So many different cultures trying to assert themselves and everyone trying hard to keep from offending anyone. I love my country I just wish we had a more progressive outlook on mental health. Officially, by the way, I'm autism spectrum disorder and numerous others. Having a label did help me to realize that there isn't something wrong with me. My brain just works differently. I'm trying to stay away from my daughter being officially diagnosed as the kids at her mean enough. I also feel that most will be just fine with simple understanding and a good support system therefore not needing to take medication that can cause more harm than good at times. I might have changed my situation sooner had I realized that I wasn't a freak of nature. I waited until too late and am disabled now. I just wish I could reach out and let all those who utilize different parts of their brains in different ways and experience life more intensely in some ways and just let them know they are beautiful just how they are. They add their unique perspective and talents to the world and the world is better for their contributions. I wish I could keep them all supported emotionally and keep them from suffering by trying to be "normal". Normal doesn't exist.
:chat: :hug: :cheer:
-
There is so much interesting stuff in this thread for me to think about.
I am now editing my two lengthy posts, actually completely removing them, some 2000 words where I went on and on about my problems that were pretty heavy and it seems not entirely within the guidelines of Off Topic. I certainly did not intend to exceed the guidelines but, well that's just how I am so am rectifying my posts here for the good of the thread and its OP.
I enjoyed immensely being supported so well by you who read and responded to my text and I cannot thank you all enough.
I have preserved the text and anyone who is curious just please feel free to ask and I will PM it to you without modifications.
Thanks everypony! I love the community here.
-
I wasn't able to get into college for money reasons and got into computers on a high school education and that served me pretty well for a decade or two and then I had some difficulties with some powerful bullies with friends in the local government of a town where I bought a house, who did things like send a swat team to arrest me instead of an ambulance when I called 911 with a detaching retina needing emergency surgery, and held me without treatment overnight and now I have partial blindness...the good part in the center (of my one really good eye) that used to be 20/10 is now zero except for a thin crescent of vision at 20/200 so it is very stressful to read and my brain substitutes things into the space I can't see through so I can't do the sort of high-level data analysis that made me a good network engineer, and I can't study textbooks faster than 5 pages per hour, and I can't scan at all. Seems I hadn't learned how to avoid angering bullies, or let's be honest, even tried to avoid angering bullies.
I think next time somebody asks me why I'm petrified of police, I'll show them this comment.
Sorry that happened to you, by the way. :( It's odd to me that the SWAT team would either not notice
or completely ignore that you needed emergency medical care.
Post Merge: March 15, 2016, 08:11:57 AM
It's Aspie I have a problem with because I hate how that word sounds which is another trait; hating how certain words sound.
Oh my, this I didn't know!
That would explain why I get unusually irritated when somebody says the word "door" around me. /cringe
-
Lost pony, I'm so sorry for all you've been through. :cry: I've never been able to understand how people can treat others that way. (Got me hurt a lot, too) my daughter's having the same problem that you had at school. She's smart and bored silly. Schools don't like kids to skip a grade because then that's a whole year of money they don't get. It's rare to find an educator that actually gives a darn whether their students are learning. My daughter's been in so much trouble this year because she's taken it upon herself to tell everyone how to do, spell, say, even play 'the right way'. I'm so disabled that I can't do much, so I continue to teach her myself at home and do everything I can to make school less horrid. I even went to a meeting with her teacher and principal to discuss skipping a grade. They gave her the paper test and she got all the answers correct, but in the 'show your work' section she drew a little picture of her brain instead of writing out 5-1=4 and such. They failed her for that :mad: I thought it was very creative. The meeting itself was so awful for me that I passed out after. I just couldn't function.
Sapphire rain, for me it's all about enunciation and volume. I have a physical reaction to raised voices and grind my teeth at mispronounced words.
-
Cant blame anyone for being concerned reguardless. Its great if one doesn't need a professional diagnosis and can cope with what they deal with perfectly fine--but its also nice to have closure, especially if that means gaining access to tools or resources to try to cope better if you feel you cant do it on your own.
Online 'tests' are a huge red flag and any time someone feels like it could determine something for them, I get worried. I just want those that think they need a diagnosis to do it the proper way.
As far as country stigmas go, honestly it depends where you are and how long whatever you have has been eating at you. Are you past the point of caring what anyone else thinks?
That said, this entire thread has gone from innocent 'does anyone else have this' ok to stay in Off topic, to something that really shouldn't be in OT. I don't want to have to move it so im going to ask one last time. Keep the thread light and within the original intentions of the OP.
-
Again, it's text heavy so I haven't fully read or found the post in question I'm mainly replying to, but I actually am a person who likely would have been diagnosed Aspergers when it was a thing, and am super uncomfy with that terminology.
Also, I'm totally pro self diagnosis :) I'm not talking about taking one online test here of course. There's lots of resources online that are more accurate than what the doctor's use and the autistic activist community as a whole is pro self diagnosis for a number of reasons I won't go into here to stay on topic. :)
As for the collections/fixations thing—collecting and toys are both totally two fixations for me that combine regularly. I spend more time just looking at toys online, learning about them, reading reviews for them etc than doing just about anything else whatsoever and that's been true of me for over a year! (before, writing was my main interest and took up the majority of my waking life like this does now.) The exact toys in question varies though and the focus switches between them. Which is great, because there is always a ton more out there to learn about rather than it going stale. :P
-
Again, it's text heavy so I haven't fully read or found the post in question I'm mainly replying to, but I actually am a person who likely would have been diagnosed Aspergers when it was a thing, and am super uncomfy with that terminology.
Also, I'm totally pro self diagnosis :) I'm not talking about taking one online test here of course. There's lots of resources online that are more accurate than what the doctor's use and the autistic activist community as a whole is pro self diagnosis for a number of reasons I won't go into here to stay on topic. :)
We will have to respectfully disagree. One reason, melodys_angel is correct. Many traits of ASD can share characteristics with other conditions. Another example there is a form of ADHD that can closely resemble what was formally called Asperger's here. A medical doctor who is a friend of mine told me his professor told him in school that many healthy students each year are terrified after learning about brain tumors and they will leave class that day convinced they have one- based on the symptoms which are also common in the populous and shared with many and more innocuous things.
Also, If something is causing a struggle functioning, it's worthwhile to get a correct diagnosis and correct help. In some places a formal diagnoses allows funding and access to programs for this to be covered as well. If you are in school, modifying programs to accommodate your specific needs which they won't if you don't have a confirmed reason. Not all Dr's are good, I know. If you feel that your concerns are brushed off and need help, keep perusing it and get a second opinion. Medically we have to be our own best advocate. For things I have been concerned with, my Dr's have been excellent checking for things I asked based on my symptoms when showing a list of family history of that issue and why I would be concerned. Or have spoken with me without a poo pooing tone if I ask questions based on reputable research I found.
-
There is so much interesting stuff in this thread for me to think about.
I am now editing my two lengthy posts, actually completely removing them, some 2000 words where I went on and on about my problems that were pretty heavy and it seems not entirely within the guidelines of Off Topic. I certainly did not intend to exceed the guidelines but, well that's just how I am so am rectifying my posts here for the good of the thread and its OP.
I enjoyed immensely being supported so well by you who read and responded to my text and I cannot thank you all enough.
I have preserved the text and anyone who is curious just please feel free to ask and I will PM it to you without modifications.
Thanks everypony! I love the community here.
-
If you can find a good professional an official diagnosis can sometimes calm and help you to understand why. I'm so sorry melodys_angel. I'm trying to keep it from getting into dark areas.
-
I just came here to say, yes I have AS and collect. Before collecting... I liked organizing, I have an organized chaos as I also struggle with ADD. The days when I function well my collection and management is super amazing, the days I don't, collecting can be a hell. My entire family is pretty much defined by hoarding.
-
I must apologise. I had absolutely no idea that my post would elicit such strong feelings among so many here on the Arena. With hindsight, I suppose that was obvious, but that really wasn't my intention! I'm glad everyone is talking about it, I really am and I think that's great, I just really had no idea it would stir up so much!
I really did just want to know if people generally thought there may be a connection between AS and collecting ponies because something I read mentioned that toy collecting and categorising is common in AS children. I just wondered if it continued to be common amongst AS adults and given that we are all adults on here, I thought I'd ask the question :P
In spite of the thread turning out to be mostly about diagnosis and it having wandered slightly OT, I want to thank everyone for their posts. Everyone has been incredibly honest, open and incredibly kind and it makes me happy to be a part of this lovely, supportive community. Thank you all for your heartfelt advice - I know it all comes from a good place and is very well-intentioned. I will spend some time going back over the thread and re-reading it when I have more time as there is a wealth of information from people who are far further along the path in this area than me and I will keep you posted on my progress.
Many of us will have faced lots of difficulties in various aspects of our lives due to having some of the traits associated with AS. For me, it seems to be chronic fatigue, being unable to fit in with my peer group, having chronic stress and anxiety and being overly emotional (along with lots of other things!). Many of you have shared your specific difficulties and talked about how hard it was to get a diagnosis (or whether you even wanted one!) and what it meant to you once you had it...
...you have also touched on the many, many positive traits of the "syndrome" (not sure what to call it now, lol!) and to my mind, those wonderful attributes, many and varied as they may be between individuals, vastly outweigh any of the negatives. Again, thank you so much for sharing all of your stories - it's given me a hugely greater insight into AS and a positive starting point for what could be a lengthy and difficult process ahead. Knowing how many of you are out there, and specifically here, on this forum, and that you all share a wonderful passion for ponies, makes it all seem so much easier :)
-
I have aspergers syndrome and was diagnosed at 16, so I did not get the cognitive therapy at all. In school it was the toss things at the wall and see what sticks approach. Though if the bunch of us formed a group can we make the gen 3 pony Puzzlemint our mascot?
-
I must apologise. I had absolutely no idea that my post would elicit such strong feelings among so many here on the Arena. With hindsight, I suppose that was obvious, but that really wasn't my intention! I'm glad everyone is talking about it, I really am and I think that's great, I just really had no idea it would stir up so much!
I really did just want to know if people generally thought there may be a connection between AS and collecting ponies because something I read mentioned that toy collecting and categorising is common in AS children. I just wondered if it continued to be common amongst AS adults and given that we are all adults on here, I thought I'd ask the question :P
In spite of the thread turning out to be mostly about diagnosis and it having wandered slightly OT, I want to thank everyone for their posts. Everyone has been incredibly honest, open and incredibly kind and it makes me happy to be a part of this lovely, supportive community. Thank you all for your heartfelt advice - I know it all comes from a good place and is very well-intentioned. I will spend some time going back over the thread and re-reading it when I have more time as there is a wealth of information from people who are far further along the path in this area than me and I will keep you posted on my progress.
Many of us will have faced lots of difficulties in various aspects of our lives due to having some of the traits associated with AS. For me, it seems to be chronic fatigue, being unable to fit in with my peer group, having chronic stress and anxiety and being overly emotional (along with lots of other things!). Many of you have shared your specific difficulties and talked about how hard it was to get a diagnosis (or whether you even wanted one!) and what it meant to you once you had it...
...you have also touched on the many, many positive traits of the "syndrome" (not sure what to call it now, lol!) and to my mind, those wonderful attributes, many and varied as they may be between individuals, vastly outweigh any of the negatives. Again, thank you so much for sharing all of your stories - it's given me a hugely greater insight into AS and a positive starting point for what could be a lengthy and difficult process ahead. Knowing how many of you are out there, and specifically here, on this forum, and that you all share a wonderful passion for ponies, makes it all seem so much easier :)
Oops, I didn't realize it took on a far more serious tone that wasn't intended. :) Hm, I don't know about pony collecting specifically. but, with the children/people I have met who have ASD and also a specialized passion (hobby or interest) they were knowledgeable enough to teach a course on that subject. One little boy educated me so much on trains, different types and small details most people would never know about. totally self taught too. He was cute, his mom gave him a signal where he then paused and asked if I would like to hear time tell me more about trains. :)
I have wondered about ponies and another group. Obviously completely anecdotal but I do wonder if something about the line attracts "art people" disproportionately. hobbyists, students or designers. Artistically, I am drawn to ponies because of the themes and details I have found in the line and artistic qualities in the toys and packaging. Some years have their own "colour palette" and somehow this pleases me greatly! (as an art student I may be biased in seeing other people in the artistic realm and taking note. students, or professionals)
-
I can relate to the art thing. Ponies are fun and easy to draw, when you expand your horizons towards every generation there's a large poolof characters to choose from and I feel like other artists would have a ball finding their favorites!
-
I was diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome at 25. It was a huge relief for me to get a diagnosis. I had been struggling so much with life and had been through a complete breakdown. Now I finally knew why I had always felt different and why things in life that seemed so easy and straightforward to others were so incredibly hard for me.
I have always been collecting different things and I have always loved toys. I don't think of myself as a collector, though. My toys really help me cope with this world.
Some months back there was another topic that made me aware that there are a lot of other autistic people on here and that was pretty cool to discover :)
-
I was diagnosed with Asperger when I was 17. I have started to doubt that it's correct though. I've met a few other people with Asperger and they were more noticeably different than I am.
-
A medical doctor who is a friend of mine told me his professor told him in school that many healthy students each year are terrified after learning about brain tumors and they will leave class that day convinced they have one- based on the symptoms which are also common in the populous and shared with many and more innocuous things.
Lol, I can relate to that. When I took abnormal psych as part of my Biology degree I was diagnosing everyone I knew with things. All kinds of wacky conditions. Haha. It really is best not to self diagnose anything. Maybe you're right, maybe you're not. But a specialist knows way more than you. That's their job. Plus they know what happens next.
It is good to know yourself though, AJB. So it's great that you're taking the time to assess yourself.
-
I was diagnosed with Asperger when I was 17. I have started to doubt that it's correct though. I've met a few other people with Asperger and they were more noticeably different than I am.
No two people with Asperger's/autism are the same. If you have met one person with autism then you have met one person with autism. I have met several other people with Asperger's/autism and they all seem very different from me. I questioned a lot too if I really did have autism because even with other autistic people I don't fit in. I do not strike as autistic. But I do have autism, there are too many things that give it away for me and everyone is an individual, maybe even more so when you have autism. I am not saying that you definately have autism because I have no way of knowing that. I'm just telling you my own experience :)
-
Just an update...I now have a referral from my GP to the National Autistic Society. It might be a few weeks before I am seen but at least the ball is rolling :)
-
applejackbunny - Congrats! :)
Your post, thank you too. Reading all the responses.... It's making me think about going to my Dr. as well..... well, once we have extra coverage through OH's work again. As if they send me for referral we can't afford the travel out of pocket at this point.
I was diagnosed with Asperger when I was 17. I have started to doubt that it's correct though. I've met a few other people with Asperger and they were more noticeably different than I am.
No two people with Asperger's/autism are the same. If you have met one person with autism then you have met one person with autism. I have met several other people with Asperger's/autism and they all seem very different from me. I questioned a lot too if I really did have autism because even with other autistic people I don't fit in. I do not strike as autistic. But I do have autism, there are too many things that give it away for me and everyone is an individual, maybe even more so when you have autism. I am not saying that you definately have autism because I have no way of knowing that. I'm just telling you my own experience :)
:beerchug: Yes on the bolded! I got to meet many people because of my brother. it would be like someone thinking all pony collectors will be carbon copies of one another.
-
Wonderful :) It sounds like your doctor wanted to work with you.
-
It's called the autism "spectrum" for a reason. I wonder how many different issues are lumped together under one umbrella...seems like there is always a lot more to know. What specialists know is updated all the time.
If anyone is concerned about their existing diagnosis, that seems like as good a reason as any to consult more with doctors, to get more understanding? More help? Updated evaluation? Just my thoughts on it.
-
This is true in America I believe, but not here in the UK. As I am new to all this, someone can correct me if I'm wrong, but I'm pretty sure I read exactly that, that they kept the phrase Asperger's Syndrome here in the UK, despite the review of the term in the US.
The Autism Act wrote it out to refer to conditions on the Autistic Spectrum instead. But all the autism professionals I have been involved with, both as a support assistant and as a student with autism myself, still use the term and still believe the term, or equivalent, is necessary to distinguish between severe autism and higher functioning autism.
HFA is generally considered different from Asperger's Syndrome. I am unsure why, but I think it has to do with how you interact with people - ie, whether or not you want to interact with people?
As for the serious tone of the thread, I think that was natural? There are a lot of ASD pony collectors and we all have different experiences :) Also, the reality is that not many people generally ask *our* view on Autism in any regard. They ask specialists, professionals, experts. Sometimes family members of people with ASD - but unless they have it too, none of them actually know what it's like to live with it. They live with someone with it, which is a different situation and stress position. If you live with someone with it, you are supporting them, but you can still walk out of the room and leave the ASD somewhere else. If you live with it, you can't do that. And far too often people ask only the one set of opinions, and not the opinions of the people who know best.
There seems to be a general misconception among areas of mainstream media in various places that having ASD immediately makes you unable to comment, judge or have any kind of point of view.
So threads like this are ways we can actually speak for ourselves and try and kill some of those prejudices and assumptions. Thus here we all are, spamming your thread with our experiences :)
Then again, ponies and ASD are obviously a connection. So in that light, maybe it's not off topic? I mean, from my point of view, I can't remember not having ponies. And ponies marked key events in my life. When my sister was born, when my mum was ill, when I graduated...all these things. So in a way, ponies became markers of milestones that are, in their own way, achievements of living with ASD in spite of the large amount of misinterpretation that still exists regarding it.
In any case, whatever you decide to do about it, or if you don't decide to do about it, it doesn't ultimately change who you are. It identifies something about you, but that's really all :)
I was diagnosed with Asperger when I was 17. I have started to doubt that it's correct though. I've met a few other people with Asperger and they were more noticeably different than I am.
All people with ASD are different, though, even within the same Asperger diagnosis that can be true. I worked with about 12 different students with differing ASD diagnoses over the two years I was at the FE college. Every single one of them was different from each other AND FROM ME. I could identify with things they did and understood them quite easily, but I didn't relate to every characteristic each of them had. Some were more outgoing, some more introvert. Some got lost easily, some knew routes backwards. Some were confident, some were not. Some would get stressed out by change, others wouldn't care. Some liked art and creative things, others were into science. The one identifier between all of them was the proof they were all unique people, and their personalities and interests dictated the way in which they were affected by their ASD as much as the severity of it did.
I don't believe a one size fits all judgement can possibly be used for any type of autism. It's just too dependent on the individual.
-
Well in that case, I'm very happy to have been of some help by starting a topic so many of you feel so strongly about and I'm really glad it has given you the opportunity to speak about it :)
-
Then again, ponies and ASD are obviously a connection. So in that light, maybe it's not off topic? I mean, from my point of view, I can't remember not having ponies. And ponies marked key events in my life. When my sister was born, when my mum was ill, when I graduated...all these things. So in a way, ponies became markers of milestones that are, in their own way, achievements of living with ASD in spite of the large amount of misinterpretation that still exists regarding it.
They've become markers for me as well. I've loved ponies since I was two, based on my grandmother's story of me giving her a full lecture about pegasus ponies in a sears store and having other patrons wonder how I knew so much. I did not meet the age requirement on the package, thus did not get my pegasus. got my first two ponies at three. I remember when I got the rest, even which ponies I was forced to leave behind at yardsales and when I got those ones as an adult. anyway this is cute, hopefully you find it funny!
I visited with my dad, and he's odd.... he will not have a conversation, he hates small talk or any topic that does not interest him (not my favorite thing either.... but I know you can't just walk off mid conversation because you are bored! my dad is the absent minded professor). but he loves quizzing. he asked me geography questions and I answered them all correctly, and a quiz about the US because of an article he read and I knew more about the states then the general populous of USA as adults according to that article. He was expecting me to do poorly.
"You were terrible at geography in school. Terrible. I never was able to help you. What changed?" So I explained in school it was boring and irrelevant. I didn't know why I needed to care about a gross national product of a country I have no interest in seeing, or didn't connect to me. and I had zero interest in most travel. so I bombed that class. :blush: It's all due to ponies, which is embarrassing. Each country he asked about I either read about a line of ponies made there (and some I own- so like early Italy ponies) so also learned a bit about the area. others I had bought or sold to people from that country so looked up what I could for how the pony would travel. I was telling him my pony related stories connected to each place and now he thinks I'm crazy. :P
-
Hmmmm I would prefer not to be diagnosed or labelled. Other people's diagnoses' is none of my business.
I treat people like human beings, not according to how psychiatry manuals advise that certain individuals should be gently handled. ;)
If you like ponies and you're here, that's fine by me. Don't expect to be treated any differently than anyone else, because we are here for our love of ponies!
-
Eh, my brain has always worked differently then most other people, simple things I don't get but complex things are easy and my social skills are almost non existant (plus I will tell you exactly how I fell or think no matter how rude it is), but at 36 years old, I have no desire to find out im just weird or if there is an actual reason for it.
-
Hmmmm I would prefer not to be diagnosed or labelled. Other people's diagnoses' is none of my business.
I treat people like human beings, not according to how psychiatry manuals advise that certain individuals should be gently handled. ;)
If you like ponies and you're here, that's fine by me. Don't expect to be treated any differently than anyone else, because we are here for our love of ponies!
That's how everyone should treat each other. The same. We're all just people. My mother always said to treat others the way you want them to treat you. It's a rule I live by.
Tikibirds: the only reason I went and got an official diagnosis is because I wasn't getting by. I needed extra help and in order to get it I had to swallow any pride I had left. To get help you have to jump through a lot of hoops.
-
As for the serious tone of the thread, I think that was natural? There are a lot of ASD pony collectors and we all have different experiences :) Also, the reality is that not many people generally ask *our* view on Autism in any regard. They ask specialists, professionals, experts. Sometimes family members of people with ASD - but unless they have it too, none of them actually know what it's like to live with it. They live with someone with it, which is a different situation and stress position. If you live with someone with it, you are supporting them, but you can still walk out of the room and leave the ASD somewhere else. If you live with it, you can't do that. And far too often people ask only the one set of opinions, and not the opinions of the people who know best.
There seems to be a general misconception among areas of mainstream media in various places that having ASD immediately makes you unable to comment, judge or have any kind of point of view.
So threads like this are ways we can actually speak for ourselves and try and kill some of those prejudices and assumptions. Thus here we all are, spamming your thread with our experiences :)
Then again, ponies and ASD are obviously a connection. So in that light, maybe it's not off topic? I mean, from my point of view, I can't remember not having ponies. And ponies marked key events in my life. When my sister was born, when my mum was ill, when I graduated...all these things. So in a way, ponies became markers of milestones that are, in their own way, achievements of living with ASD in spite of the large amount of misinterpretation that still exists regarding it.
Taffeta you have really said it well. Thank you. This thread is for us.
In defense of everyone including the moderator, I think I was the only one getting carried away; the rest of you were all fine.
I too had a lot of things accumulated that marked those important milestones for me, and having lost them all, I find having some ponies helps fill in those holes just a little bit.
I visited with my dad, and he's odd.... he will not have a conversation, he hates small talk or any topic that does not interest him (not my favorite thing either.... but I know you can't just walk off mid conversation because you are bored! my dad is the absent minded professor). but he loves quizzing. he asked me geography questions and I answered them all correctly, and a quiz about the US because of an article he read and I knew more about the states then the general populous of USA as adults according to that article. He was expecting me to do poorly.
"You were terrible at geography in school. Terrible. I never was able to help you. What changed?" So I explained in school it was boring and irrelevant. I didn't know why I needed to care about a gross national product of a country I have no interest in seeing, or didn't connect to me. and I had zero interest in most travel. so I bombed that class. :blush: It's all due to ponies, which is embarrassing. Each country he asked about I either read about a line of ponies made there (and some I own- so like early Italy ponies) so also learned a bit about the area. others I had bought or sold to people from that country so looked up what I could for how the pony would travel. I was telling him my pony related stories connected to each place and now he thinks I'm crazy. :P
FantsticFirefly you have hit on the DiBronski "gifted learner" theorem: it is almost impossible to push things into our memory if we have no interest in them, but if we find them exciting we have a heightened capacity to absorb everything in great detail. This was so true for me that I was for years incapable of learning the times tables, and was teased for a whole class period for being unable to remember that 7x3=21 even when it had come up over and over, which excited me enough to remember 7x3=21 and became the basis for remembering 7s and where the other numbers intersected 7 to learn those numbers too. Public education does little to excite us about information. I didn't learn very well there until something excites me.
It sounds like your dad shares some of your traits. I think many of us do.
Hmmmm I would prefer not to be diagnosed or labelled. Other people's diagnoses' is none of my business.
I treat people like human beings, not according to how psychiatry manuals advise that certain individuals should be gently handled. ;)
If you like ponies and you're here, that's fine by me. Don't expect to be treated any differently than anyone else, because we are here for our love of ponies!
That's how everyone should treat each other. The same. We're all just people. My mother always said to treat others the way you want them to treat you. It's a rule I live by.
Tikibirds: the only reason I went and got an official diagnosis is because I wasn't getting by. I needed extra help and in order to get it I had to swallow any pride I had left. To get help you have to jump through a lot of hoops.
Tak, I always took pride in what was different about me. I was better than everyone else, and thought I was a nice guy but in fact I'm pretty much a total jerk and that dug a big hole for me in social interactions. It took getting buried in that hole for me to see that I was not a nice guy and was responsible for people treating me badly, and I finally began to try to do better, which has to happen every day with each interaction. For example I can't even ask an eBay seller for a better price on a beatup pony without offending him and getting a jerk response. The only difference now is that instead of escalating, I looked back at my own words and could see that it was my fault. The "golden rule" is to treat each other as we wish to be treated...but I personally fall short and have to constantly double-check myself.
Well in that case, I'm very happy to have been of some help by starting a topic so many of you feel so strongly about and I'm really glad it has given you the opportunity to speak about it :)
applejackbunny, I can't thank you enough for starting this thread, and everypony for tolerating me here.
Happy ponying all!
-
Lostpony, there is no "tolerating" - you are positively and warmly welcome! Everypony is! I have to say that I am overwhelmed by all the responses and really admire each and every one of you for your brilliant and moving stories. I'm sorry I haven't said much more about my own situation, but I feel that until I have a diagnosis, I'm not really "qualified" to say anything, because I only know that I have many, many of the traits, but don't know, as of yet, whether I am actually on the spectrum or not...watch this space! :)
-
I've pretty much always collected ponies. I was actively seeking them out and saving all my money to get as many as I could get my hands on by 7. I'm also very much a list person and my pony collection played well into that habit too - I used to keep a note of which pony I got on what day and so how old they were. But I didn't get a diagnosis until I was 27 when my Mum read an article in the paper.
I also take advantage of the pony conventions. Knowing that the other people are there for ponies is so reassuring and that 99% of the conversations will be about them. When I started out I was very shy and didn't want to talk to anyone plus I didn't know the way to act. But every year I learn something new and grow a bit as a person.
Personally I've found that it helps for me have a diagnosis. Being able to justify to myself why I'm feeling a certain way about something. It also helps to be able to tell someone that you have Aspergers when you've just broken down in front of them. Perhaps some people will understand why you're crying without you telling them but being able to say the three words "I have Aspergers" is just such a relief for me. Once that's said I can ignore worrying about offending them and concentrate on calming myself.
-
I was not a nice guy and was responsible for people treating me badly, and I finally began to try to do better, which has to happen every day with each interaction. For example I can't even ask an eBay seller for a better price on a beatup pony without offending him and getting a jerk response. The only difference now is that instead of escalating, I looked back at my own words and could see that it was my fault. The "golden rule" is to treat each other as we wish to be treated...but I personally fall short and have to constantly double-check myself.
Lostpony, from what you wrote (unless I've misinterpreted it) it sounds as if the issue was how you came across to others, rather than your intentions being off. That most definitely doesn't make you "not a nice guy" as you say. I think that as long as your intentions are good and fair, then you are not at fault. You may have issues with getting those intentions across, but as you said, you can work on that.
I have a similar problem in that I simply cannot stand up for myself (even in the face of gross unfairness) without either crying (and therefore coming across as pathetic and ineffectual and thereby irritating people) or being far too blunt and offending people. I simply cannot do the whole "calm but firm" thing in a face-to-face scenario such as you may get at work. I have found that the only way I can deal with any kind of grievance I may have is if I am able to write it down. Where possible, that is what I will do. I find I can communicate extremely easily and effectively when I write, but just crumble completely in a face-to-face situation. We are all different, but that is one of my major issues.
So, lostpony, I don't know if I've understood you quite correctly, but it sounds as if you are being a little too hard on yourself. You don't seem like "not a nice guy" at all, you may just have issues with that ever-complex thing...communication : )
Post Merge: March 19, 2016, 03:20:58 PM
Personally I've found that it helps for me have a diagnosis. Being able to justify to myself why I'm feeling a certain way about something. It also helps to be able to tell someone that you have Aspergers when you've just broken down in front of them. Perhaps some people will understand why you're crying without you telling them but being able to say the three words "I have Aspergers" is just such a relief for me. Once that's said I can ignore worrying about offending them and concentrate on calming myself.
This! :)
-
Lostpony, from what you wrote (unless I've misinterpreted it) it sounds as if the issue was how you came across to others, rather than your intentions being off. That most definitely doesn't make you "not a nice guy" as you say. I think that as long as your intentions are good and fair, then you are not at fault. You may have issues with getting those intentions across, but as you said, you can work on that.
I have a similar problem in that I simply cannot stand up for myself (even in the face of gross unfairness) without either crying (and therefore coming across as pathetic and ineffectual and thereby irritating people) or being far too blunt and offending people. I simply cannot do the whole "calm but firm" thing in a face-to-face scenario such as you may get at work. I have found that the only way I can deal with any kind of grievance I may have is if I am able to write it down. Where possible, that is what I will do. I find I can communicate extremely easily and effectively when I write, but just crumble completely in a face-to-face situation. We are all different, but that is one of my major issues.
So, lostpony, I don't know if I've understood you quite correctly, but it sounds as if you are being a little too hard on yourself. You don't seem like "not a nice guy" at all, you may just have issues with that ever-complex thing...communication : )
Another thing I was always taught as a young child was "if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all". In following that rule I was pretty much a doormat until I got so angry that I went berserker mode. I agree lostpony isn't a bad person, just had different circumstances in life which didn't necessarily help you learn to step back before reacting. My dad always says that you can't control what happens, only how you react to it. Since you are really the only thing that you control. It's so much easier to handle in hindsight.
Also, my daughter was officially diagnosed asd yesterday. I'm very against medicating children unless absolutely necessary, so we are working on games, relaxation techniques, appropriate communication, and essentially learning to hide how smart she is on the playground while letting it all out in the classroom. Not sure if I'm good enough to handle all of it, but I must try.
-
I will say from experience finding out for the first time shattered my world as none of my siblings have it. I am now just accepting of it, and realize it is a part of me for good or ill.
-
Sorry to hear that, that's awful :|
I'm the opposite. I think I will be very much at peace with it....*if* that's what I have :relaxed:
-
Thanks applejackbunny and Tak.
For me (not laying this on anyone else, just me), it is the difference between assuming I am nice and actually examining how I approach people. The assumption meant I didn't have to look and always thought it was the other guy. Of course it sometimes is the other guy, but it's also sometimes me. More than sometimes it's me I think, looking back.
I never really put that "if you don't have anything nice to say" advice into practice. Like any advice, applying it too much is as bad as applying it too little. Good luck finding the right balance.
Tak, I am certain you are the best possible person to help your daughter. Your dad is absolutely correct about controlling how we react. A corollary to that is if we don't control how we react, then things will only get worse as others react to our reaction...and so on.
For me, good advice is like not touching the hot burner on the stove. It's one thing to hear it and another thing entirely to get burned. Then, I still reach out to touch it again....and yet I'm the smart one right? Turns out, not so much. Ah, life lessons....so slow to sink in, for me. At 40+ years old I think I might be starting to learn a couple things.
Thanks everypony!
-
I will say from experience finding out for the first time shattered my world as none of my siblings have it. I am now just accepting of it, and realize it is a part of me for good or ill.
It can be the best parts of you. I try to focus on that. My house is always clean and we overflow with creativity. Baking and cooking lend themselves to experimentation easily. It's really hard to make brownies taste bad. For me anyway. :P Eventually I found that I would rather be me in all my crazy glory than be any other way. (Mostly because my path led to my daughter and, yes, I'm biased, :) but I think she's amazing).
Thanks lostpony. I will always get back up, even if some pieces go missing, and take care of my girl.
-
It can be the best parts of you. I try to focus on that. My house is always clean and we overflow with creativity.
I'm so jealous :lol: Creativity, sure, but mine went the exact opposite way when it comes to keeping the house clean.
-
Nobody should have to make excuses about getting a diagnosis. One of the negative effects of socieyy living in denial of diversity is a tendency for ASD people to feel the need to justify or explain themselves. But it is nobody else's business.
Also, we have a law in the UK which states that if treating someone with a protected characteristic results in them being disadvantaged then that qualifies as discrimination. I am really independent, but without my diagnosis, I would not have a bus or rail pass. My navigation is prohibitive in driving, and so I would not ever go anywhere without this backup in times I get lost. There are things different people can or cannot do...in my opinion, telling a person with ASD to be like everyone else and expect no understanding of that diversity is the same as telling a wheelchair user to walk up stairs.
If you would not do that, because it is ridiculous, you ought to have the same flexibility of mind towards people whose disability is not physically obvious.
I feel the need to underscore also that ASD is not a mental illness,. It can open people up to mental illness comorbidities, but in my view 90% of anxiety and depression in asd people comes from them trying to meet the unreasonable expectations of society to fit in.
-
I feel the need to underscore also that ASD is not a mental illness,. It can open people up to mental illness comorbidities, but in my view 90% of anxiety and depression in asd people comes from them trying to meet the unreasonable expectations of society to fit in.
Totally agree with this!
-
On the tact subject...
I dunno how many people here now remember me from 1998 when I was 16 and first online.
I hope not many.
I openly admit to being still pedantic about detail, ranty, forceful and just plain odd at times. It is fine. But at 16 I had zero idea of tact. I went on massive rants about things to people....much worse than now, as I try to be more polite and sometimes walk away now. I know I made a nusiance of myself particularly over the issue of sellers not shipping internationally. I still don't like when that happens, but at least now I respect it as an individual choice. I also took apart the errors on DV, publically, and not politely, many times. While yes, there were errors...my way of handling that was less than awesome.
Where did it lead me? Active online bullying by at least two individuals which were designed to drive me out of the community and for a while succeeded. They stole from me, lied about me, posted things about my family and tried to get me to take down my site.
At the time all of that destroyed me emotionally, and I still have not forgiven it but...with my diagnosis, and reflection over time, I understood my own misdoings better, too. I sought out a lot of people I knew I had upset, apologised to them and explained.
My diagnosis helped that explanation. Not just so I could reflect on myself, but also so others realised that I never acted from malice. To me that is and was super important.
I don't mind being ASD. Diagnosis doesnt make you something other than what you are, after all. But it does get on my nerves when people take for granted doing things that for me are a huge deal, or when they don't realise that the things that upset me often defy other people logic. Sadly the world preaches equality, diversity and thinking outside the box, but still seeks to impose conformity.
Tak, I wish your daughter the best. She has won the first battle, which is having a mother who is open to the diagnosis and cares about her as she is :).
-
Taffeta, I really enjoyed your post and I thank you for it. I always like what you have to say.
You seem to have come to grips with yourself a lot sooner than I did, or do, because I am just beginning to get closer to there now...with a ways to go...
I didn't hang around here in 1998 (had other obsessions than pony), but I was getting into the online thing in other places about a year or two later, and I quit internet socializing by 2003 after a couple of disappointing interactions which were probably less the other people's fault than I thought at the time. I am just beginning again here now after, gee darn! a decade! I wonder what we would have thought of each other back then...anyway I am glad to be a part of the same community now, and I feel the same way about everyone else here too especially all the supportive people participating in this thread.
Thanks everypony.
-
I feel the need to underscore also that ASD is not a mental illness,. It can open people up to mental illness comorbidities, but in my view 90% of anxiety and depression in asd people comes from them trying to meet the unreasonable expectations of society to fit in.
Couldn't agree more!!
Also having ASD does NOT mean you are broken, defective, wrong or anything else!! You just perceive the world in a different way from the majority and there's nothing wrong with that!!
Tafetta, you are very good at speeking up about ASD. I recognize your name from back in the late 90s-early 2000s but otherwise don't really remember things about you except your website and that you were one of the "big" names on the forums. I don't think we ever had contact. I remember things got pretty nasty on the old MLP Trading Post forum, people accusing each other, people believing they were better than the rest and generally a harsh and depressing tone. I'm a very sensitive person and easily get hurt. I quit online acitivty back then because I couldn't deal with the harsh tone.
lostpony, while I accepted and appreciated my diagnosis right from the start it took me very long to come to grips with myself in that aspect. For a long time I even questioned if I really did have Asperger's and was completely baffled by adult aspies who wrote books about their life just 1-2 years after getting a diagnosis. I have just had to accept that I'm a "turtle". People grow, develop and understand themselves at different paces :)
applejackbunny, wish you the best on your journey to find out if you have ASD :)
It would be kinda neat if there was an ASD subforum where we could discuss our autistic aspects of life ........... seening there are so many of us here .........
-
Thanks Loner : ) Yes it would be nice to have a subforum for this subject as it appears to be useful for many members of this arena...what do you think mods? :hope:
-
Thanks Loner : ) Yes it would be nice to have a subforum for this subject as it appears to be useful for many members of this arena...what do you think mods? :hope:
OOOH, what a neat idea!!! We could share and compare/trade/review stimmy toys just like ponies! :lol:
-
Locked for repeatedly heading into WYP territory in OT after being reminded not to. - kkat