Beware of Seller/Trader-Manda

[Pony Adventures]

I have been avoiding doing this thread for a long time. I really didn't want to drag anyone's name through the mud and I was ultimately hoping I could still get my ponies, but I have done The Arena a disservice by not making this post sooner. I apologize.

I am out 4 ponies and $40 and Manda has refused to even talk to me anymore. Until I told her that I could see that she was logging on, she was still on here everyday, ignoring all of my messages. But I told her that I could see the last time she logged on and now she hasn't signed in since the end of March.

I was a fool and went through my inbox to clear it out at one point and deleted a few of the messages from her. However, I did not delete any of my sent items so I have very good approximations of dates. So, here is the whole story:

On around January 16, 2013 Manda sent me a message offering me two pony sets I had listed in my wanted thread. She said that she had seen the Walmart Pinkie Pie and Friends set at her local Walmart and could pick it up for me if I wanted, in addition to a brushable Starswirl that she was expecting to get from one of her international friends she was currently buying from. (I say around because I deleted her message but my response was on January 18 and was apologetic for not responding sooner, which is what I do if I don't reply to someone the same day.)

At the time, Manda had no feedback and I was weary but I figured that we all have to start somewhere. So I told her that I would be very interested in Starswirl and depending on price, also the Pinkie Pie Set. I asked for a price on the set and a shipping quote on the 18th.

On the same day, she replied that she was interested in a trade/partial trade for some of the blind bags I had on my sales list (and a few others if I could find them at my local shops) for a Spike I was also interested in.

We talked back and forth a bit this same day and figured out some details. I wanted Starswirl for sure, regardless of price. I was hesitant about the PP Set because it was $20 and I was low on funds. She replied that her Walmart actually has them on clearance for $10 and I was on board. We worked out that Starswirl would be $20, PP Set would be $10, and Spike would trade for 4 of my blindbags.

The next time we talked, I sent out a message on the 20th of January and she answered the next day. I talked about blindbag moulds and that I hadn't been able to find what she wanted but I would check another store the following day. Her reply included that she was able to get the PP Set on sale. I told her I couldn't find any of the blindbags that she wanted so she would have to choose from the ones on my sales list. We agreed Royal Riff + Twilight Sky + Cadance + Fluttershy for Spike. I asked if $35+shipping was okay for the sales portion of the trade/sale. ($20 for Starswirl, $10 for PP Set, and $5 for her time. She had quoted me $30 but I wanted to give her something for her efforts too).

The next day (Jan 22) we worked out shipping and total cost to $39.92, including paypal fees. We shared home addresses for shipping and she shared her email for paypal.

On the 23rd of January, I paid $40 to her paypal. I preferred a nice even number so I rounded up, especially since she had been so nice this whole time, even agreeing to debox the PP Set and send me the art from the box. I told her I submitted payment and that I would send out the ponies around the 28th.

On the 25th, she confirmed with me what box art I wanted.

On the 26, 27, or 28th (I deleted her message but I replied on the 28th so I am not too sure on the exact date here), she told me that she had picked up the PP Set and I replied I hadn't sent out the blindbags but that I needed too. I really didn't want to send out my end until I received ponies, though, since I had already paid her. I didn't tell her as much but I really should have.

On February 6th I responded to a message that she had sent about a week earlier (I am not too sure the exact date but I remember being apologetic for taking a week to get back to her) that had said Starswirl was still being waited on because she was shipping internationally. She also wanted to know if I wanted to get Ploomette II from her while we were waiting for Starswirl, since Ploomette II was in my wanted list and she could get her. I replied not to stress about Starswirl because I understand international shipping takes time. I told her I really shouldn't be getting another pony at this time but to check what prices were anyway on Ploomette, just in case the price is right. I apologized about falling off the face of the earth for a week but that I was having some difficulties at home. That got us talking about some very intimate details about mental illness and life. She gave me advice on coping mechanisms. We exchanged gmail chat and Skype info. We talked quite a bit and I thought I had made a new friend. I had to cut a chat short because I need to go grocery shopping before the store closed and I think she may have interpreted that as me thinking poorly of her because right before I cut the chat short, she was talking about conspiracy theories (which is right up my alley! I actually felt the exact same way!)

After that time though, we didn't talk again until Starswirl came in which was February 20th. She messaged me and asked if I wanted her sent out right away or if I was going to want Ploomette II too. This was the last time I heard from Manda.

I replied on the 27th that I would ask my bf about Ploomette II but to send out what she has now. I asked her if she would be willing to chat with me again.

On March 1st, I apologized for taking so long to reply to her message from the 20th and that I had talked to my bf and that he said to hold off on Ploomette II for the time being. I also told her that her blindbags were ready to send out.

On March 5th, I messaged her that I sent out the blindbags and asked her how she was.

On March 21st, I asked her if she was okay, if she received any of my messages, and if she had received the blindbags. I asked if she sent out her end and I expressed my concern that I hadn't heard from her. I wished her well.

On March 23rd, I sent the following:

"Hello again!
I still haven't heard from you and I was missing my ponies. Can you still ship them out? Did the blindbags I sent to you ever make it?  Are you doing ok? Can you please give me some type of status update?

I hope everything is okay. Please let me know what is going on with Starswirl and the Pinkie Pie set as soon as possible.

All the Best,
Pony Adventures"

On March 29, 2013, I asked for a status update, asked if she was still able to send out her end and if not, she needed to let me know and in which case, I wanted a full refund and my sealed blindbags sent back to me. If she needed more time, that was perfectly ok too, she just needed to tell me. I pleaded that she let me know what was going on. I complained that she hadn't even told me if she received the blindbags alright. I told her that I could see that she had been on the arena on her profile, so it seems that she was merely avoiding me. I asked if she was alright and if there was anything I can do and to please just let me know.

(I was checking her profile regularly to see what her last sign in date was. She was on here almost every day or every other day up until I sent her this message.)

The final message I sent is written below and occurred on April 6, 2013:
"
I am getting weary of this. I sent you $40 near the end of january. I sent you four blind bags in february.  It is now april. Please send me a full refund and the unopened blind bags (or $10 for their worth + what I spent on shipping) or send me the ponies you promised me.

You came to me to try to get me to buy from you. At the time you had no feedback and I was worried but I figured we all have to start somewhere and gave you the benefit of the doubt. I could have bought the same ponies from someone established. And if you recall, I wasn't going to buy the Pinkie Pie set until you talked me into it. I was just trying to meet new people here on the arena and do you a favor.

I will still give you positive feedback and harbor no resentment if you would just talk to me. However, if you choose to keep ignoring me, I will give you negative feedback, complain to a mod, and perhaps create a buyer beware post about you. I really don't want to do that though.

Please respond to me.

All the Best,
Pony Adventures
"

So that is the story. I realize that I may have been too aggressive but I was irritated. I messaged the mods and they were unable to get ahold of Manda. ponylady directed me to make this post so that everyone else would be warned and so that we might get her attention, if she is lurking. I am sorry this took so much of your time just to read and I thank you for hearing me out. Please let me know if you need anymore details.

[Stormness_1]

You poor thing! I hope the mods sort this out or she comes forward, it really is horrible when these things happen. I know how you feel, I've been on the losing end of a trade too. Thankyou for letting other members know as well, sometimes it's hard to admit that you've been taken advantage of.

Best of luck getting your ponies and $$ back!

[Pony Adventures]

You poor thing! I hope the mods sort this out or she comes forward, it really is horrible when these things happen. I know how you feel, I've been on the losing end of a trade too. Thankyou for letting other members know as well, sometimes it's hard to admit that you've been taken advantage of.

Best of luck getting your ponies and $$ back!

Thank you so much. I am just sorry I didn't post this any sooner. You are right about not wanting to admit it. Though, I honestly have very little hope to see any ponies or money come back to me.

[MikeysGrrrl]

That really sucks that this happened. I understand that everyone has to start somewhere, however when someone takes a chance on someone and they pull a stunt like this, it makes people not trust people who are good and deserving.
Like that old saying... it only takes one person to ruin it for everyone. I really don't understand how anyone can just do that to someone, it's so wrong.
I hope that this gets resolved one way or another.

[little.fox]

That is a really lousy situation, I am really sorry about all this, thank you for sharing. I almost get the feeling that she just started avoiding you after you had to cut that one conversation short. And I don't know what the content of you conversation was, but if she has mental health issues of any kind I can see how that could have triggered something for her. Either way, if you are selling and trading within a community you really need to step up and take responsibility for transactions you've made, however difficult it may be. If Manda is reading this just know that everyone here will respect you for coming back and sorting this situation out, should you choose to.

[Shenanigans]

Thanks for letting us know I hope you're able to get your money or ponies! Is it too late to file a Paypal claim?

[Ringlets]

Thank you for posting your experience with Manda in here. I know its not an easy thing to do - especially when you were hoping to resolve the situation before now, but it does help protect the community and also  gives Manda a chance to come here and make things right  .
I'm sorry that after all this time you are still out of ponies and monies     Even if there was some sort of misunderstanding/upset/whatever,n or if she is dealing with real life issues etc then all she needs to do is come  back an explian what happened and work toward a solution. Unfortunately all we can do at this point is hope that she will come back and sort things out with you since its much too late to file a claim (although it woulnt hurt to try, or to send money requests to her through Paypal).  You already left appropriate feedback for the transaction which was the right thing to do   If Manda does come back and make things right ,then you can always revise the feedback later if you wish to

[NovelNerd]

Thanks for letting us know I hope you're able to get your money or ponies! Is it too late to file a Paypal claim?

Paypal only gives a 45 day window.

[Aitsuki]

That's really shameful of her, to just avoid you like that!! She has over $40 dollars in credit and goods from you, doesn't she? Well, she needs to own up to her end of the bargain!! I've only done a few transactions here, but I make sure I only take offers I can manage, and only make offers on what I have!! And if I can't afford a deal, I give a little head shake and apologize! Because I was raised to be polite and honest. It's sad that someone here on the arena did something like this, because this is supposed to be a place that collectors can sell, trade, and make deals with people who love ponies just as much as they do! I hope that this gets sorted out!

[Pony Adventures]

That is a really lousy situation, I am really sorry about all this, thank you for sharing. I almost get the feeling that she just started avoiding you after you had to cut that one conversation short. And I don't know what the content of you conversation was, but if she has mental health issues of any kind I can see how that could have triggered something for her. Either way, if you are selling and trading within a community you really need to step up and take responsibility for transactions you've made, however difficult it may be. If Manda is reading this just know that everyone here will respect you for coming back and sorting this situation out, should you choose to.

That is exactly what I was thinking. To me, it feels like an avoidant personality issue, a coping mechanism. I honestly feel that she went into the transaction with full intent to see it through. We were talking about mental health and the healtcare system and how cruddy it is and how it is almost planned to keep some people at the mercy of big business. She was doing most of the talking and I agreed with what she was saying but I didn't have the words to fully express it. So I just listened and then my bf told me I needed to get off the computer and help him go grocery shopping, so I cut it short.

She probably thinks I thought she was crazy or something but that is not at all the case. I have a blog where all I do is talk about stuff like that. I feel so bad about it because I am not the most elegant person when it comes to socializing and I am sure I botched it and made her uncomfortable. And now I gave her negative feedback and that is permanent.

Still, you are right. There is still some responsibility you have to stick to.

Post Merge: July 20, 2013, 03:16:41 AM

Thank you for posting your experience with Manda in here. I know its not an easy thing to do - especially when you were hoping to resolve the situation before now, but it does help protect the community and also  gives Manda a chance to come here and make things right  .
I'm sorry that after all this time you are still out of ponies and monies     Even if there was some sort of misunderstanding/upset/whatever,n or if she is dealing with real life issues etc then all she needs to do is come  back an explian what happened and work toward a solution. Unfortunately all we can do at this point is hope that she will come back and sort things out with you since its much too late to file a claim (although it woulnt hurt to try, or to send money requests to her through Paypal).  You already left appropriate feedback for the transaction which was the right thing to do   If Manda does come back and make things right ,then you can always revise the feedback later if you wish to

Thank you. This is definitely what I needed to hear. I didn't realize you could revise feedback. I hope Manda is also reading this.

[goddessofpeep]

I'm so sorry about your trade gone bad:(  It's always worse when you have actual ponies involved as part of your "payment".

The one thought that comes to mind - you should still have her address since it was a trade.  You can try writing her a letter to see if you can get her to respond.  She'll probably read any letters she gets, and the surprise of it might get her talking to you again.

If you really want to get her attention and try to recover your money, I *think* you can file a mail fraud complaint with the post office for goods not received since there is money involved.  Odds are slim that they'll do anything for such a low amount, and I doubt they'll take any items you sent her into account, but it might get her to finally send out your stuff.  I'm really not sure if this will apply to your situation, but here's at least one report form for you to look at:
https://postalinspectors.uspis.gov/raddocs/ps8165.pdf

You could always fill it out and send her a copy with a note saying "I don't want to do this, but if I don't hear from you by (date), I'm submitting this to the authorities".  If you want to try this, you should probably do a bit of research first before starting down that path to make sure A) you can do it legally, and B) you have the right form.  I just did a quick search, and it's been a long time since I really kept up with this stuff, so my information might not be accurate.  And of course that's the nuclear option.  It is very likely to really upset her and could turn things ugly, so only do it as the *very* last resort, and only if you *really* want a shot at getting your money back.

Good luck!  I hope you're able to recover something!

[Unicorn_pops]

Sorry to hear you are out ponies and money    You have some good suggestions and I'd Also try sending her an email since she stopped visiting this site. Have you tried to view other pony sites such as mlptrading post to see if she is a member there? I really hope she straightens this out and sends you the ponies.  Good luck!

[kaskurgi]

Was it the normal Starswirl G3? Let me know because I may have an extra one hanging about

[MiRaja]

I'm so sorry to hear.  People are so ridiculous, and to think it's all over $40.  What has she really accomplished by stealing just $40?  How does that really help her in the long run?  I don't know about the rest of you, but that $40 might just fill my gas tank, and that's about it.  I guess ruining your reputation for $40 is okay now or something.  Honestly, I can't even imagine, it's so silly and stupid, but I do hope you can recoup your money somehow. . .  :hugs: