Equal Rights brag?

[Sukeile]

Yay! I am so happy for you and your wife and human kind in general!
This is a good day

[Mkia]

This makes me so happy to hear!
Brings me a step closed to get the courage to soon come out of the closet to my parents. 

Glad to hear that the court decisions have made you more confident! You don't have to rush your coming out, though. It can be overwhelming! Feel free to pm me if you ever need to talk about it!

[Galactica]

This makes me so happy to hear!
Brings me a step closed to get the courage to soon come out of the closet to my parents. 

That was really hard for me as well- and they didn't react well, but like most parents- they got over it.  I think most of why parents get upset is 1) they can't understand why you'd "choose" to have a more challenging/dangerous life; 2) By the time you are a teen/young adult, they have already built up all these fantasies in their head about who you are going to marry and the kids you will have- and suddenly that all comes crashing down.

Please feel free to PM me as well if you want to talk!

[Mkia]

This makes me so happy to hear!
Brings me a step closed to get the courage to soon come out of the closet to my parents. 

That was really hard for me as well- and they didn't react well, but like most parents- they got over it.  I think most of why parents get upset is 1) they can't understand why you'd "choose" to have a more challenging/dangerous life; 2) By the time you are a teen/young adult, they have already built up all these fantasies in their head about who you are going to marry and the kids you will have- and suddenly that all comes crashing down.

Please feel free to PM me as well if you want to talk!

Totally agreed. I've been told that to the parents it's almost like their child has been replaced with a new child. They have to forget all the things they thought their child would do, and make up new ones essentially. My mom didn't take it well either, but is completely supportive now.

[Arianna]

I'm happy with the ruling, though I'm not a member of the LGTB populace.  I stand with them; they deserve this ruling.  I don't think it really should be such a big deal; same with race, looks, etc.

I don't understand that (more outspoken, extreme) other side of the issue.  They are all for imposing their own wants and desires on people, but if some other group they disagree with gets something different, they get all up in arms.

Post Merge: June 27, 2013, 08:45:39 AM

Totally agreed. I've been told that to the parents it's almost like their child has been replaced with a new child. They have to forget all the things they thought their child would do, and make up new ones essentially. My mom didn't take it well either, but is completely supportive now.

The Daily Show with Jon Stewart or The Colbert Report had an author interview about such a thing: parents of criminals, schizophrenics, etc., who are disappointed in the fact they didn't get the child they wanted, but love the child they have.

I forget the information about the book - please look up those shows.

On a similar note, not to really do with the subject of the thread, but with my reply here:  my mom said (of course it was after a fight) how would I feel if she said she felt cheated out of the beautiful daughter she always wanted.  That's... really hard for me to take.

[Sarahlacewing]

I get upset by parents who disown their children over things like this or God forbid are violent towards them because of it.  There is nothing my child could do or say to me that would make me love them less. Literally.  Nothing.  You don't have to like what people do (my mom hates my tattoos).  You don't have to like what they believe (everyone disagrees on everything anyway) but none of that has anything to do with loving and supporting your kids. 

I know that sounds hypocritical as a religious person, and maybe it is a little.  But if religion told me to stop loving my kids or hurt my kids, then I'll tell religion it was wrong.

[Stuntwoman]

This is pretty swaggy! Now at least I won't have to worry (I think. Does this mean states legally have to allow same-gender marriage now?) about marriage and such if I can't get my damn gender marker changed.

[Sarahlacewing]

This is pretty swaggy! Now at least I won't have to worry (I think. Does this mean states legally have to allow same-gender marriage now?) about marriage and such if I can't get my damn gender marker changed.

Not all states, but it's a step in that direction.

[Galactica]

This is pretty swaggy! Now at least I won't have to worry (I think. Does this mean states legally have to allow same-gender marriage now?) about marriage and such if I can't get my damn gender marker changed.

No- the Supreme Court was careful not to go there- they just said that if a state passes a gay marriage law, the federal government will recognize that marriage as valid and give that marriage the same rights (killing DOMA which previously invalidated by federal law any gay marriage).

MOST of the states still ban gay marriage.  I think the destruction of DOMA will help lawmakers in those states change that, but it will probably be a few years yet...

[ponybanker]

me and my partner are excited although our state also has a ban on gay marriage but i figure its only a matter of time before those get nullified too. I dont see how people can justify this kind of bigotry, what if we did an amendment that said christians or mormons couldnt get married, my guess is they wouldnt like it that much. Its time for more change, but I will take what we can get for now lol. Congrats everyone!

[Mkia]

Does this mean states legally have to allow same-gender marriage now?

I wish! Basically what has happened is that now the people who are married, and live in states where same sex marriage is recognized, get the federal benefits of those in heterosexual marriages. They now get the same medical benefits in the fact that they are recognized as the person's partner and will be allowed in the hospital room and decisions as the spouse. It also affects the ability to file joint tax returns, etc.

However, if a state, such as Arizona, does not recognize same sex marriages, nothing really changes.

Essentially, it means that the federal government has to recognize same sex marriages, but the individual states still do not.

[Stuntwoman]

Does this mean states legally have to allow same-gender marriage now?

I wish! Basically what has happened is that now the people who are married, and live in states where same sex marriage is recognized, get the federal benefits of those in heterosexual marriages. They now get the same medical benefits in the fact that they are recognized as the person's partner and will be allowed in the hospital room and decisions as the spouse. It also affects the ability to file joint tax returns, etc.

However, if a state, such as Arizona, does not recognize same sex marriages, nothing really changes.

Essentially, it means that the federal government has to recognize same sex marriages, but the individual states still do not.

Hooray for the defense of state's rights over the defense of queer rights. Oh well, that's fairly swaggy at least.

[Dewprincess]

Congratulations!  Hopefully this will be a big step toward equality nationwide :-)

[Eviecorn]

The Daily Show with Jon Stewart or The Colbert Report had an author interview about such a thing: parents of criminals, schizophrenics, etc., who are disappointed in the fact they didn't get the child they wanted, but love the child they have.

I forget the information about the book - please look up those shows.

The book you're looking for is Far From the Tree by Andrew Solomon.  I read it earlier this year.  Quite a long read, but SO worth it for the amazing insight and perspectives.

[Arianna]

The Daily Show with Jon Stewart or The Colbert Report had an author interview about such a thing: parents of criminals, schizophrenics, etc., who are disappointed in the fact they didn't get the child they wanted, but love the child they have.

I forget the information about the book - please look up those shows.

The book you're looking for is Far From the Tree by Andrew Solomon.  I read it earlier this year.  Quite a long read, but SO worth it for the amazing insight and perspectives.

Yes!  That's the book.  Thank you.