Am I an unreasonable buyer?

[apanda0622]

I bought an item from a member here on March 26.  I contacted her twice about shipping when I had not received my item (its a small item so first class shipping - same country).  Her first excuse was she had family matters to deal with, which I told her was no problem, and she said she would get it out right away.  But then it didn't come, so the second excuse was pretty much that she's too busy. 

So she finally shipped it on April 8, but now its April 15 and I have not received the item.  I contacted the seller and she told me to check with my PO.  She didn't say sorry, offer a refund, or replacement item.  So I left her negative feedback with the facts.  Then she left me neutral feedback saying I was an unreasonable buyer. 

I don't think its unreasonable to want an item you bought shipped within a certain period of time.  If the seller is too busy, then they should not be actively selling on the Areana.  I'm sad that this seller simply doesn't seem to care.

[saply]

Did she provide a tracking number?

[apanda0622]

Did she provide a tracking number?

I don't think she used tracking since it was a small item shipped in a first class envelope.

[HawaiianRain]

Just so I get the facts right,  you contacted her both times when the item did not arrive? or did she contact you to let you know she was running behind?


I don't think I would have left a negative just yet as the pony has not arrived yet. I would have given it this week to arrive. It is shipping first class.

[apanda0622]

Just so I get the facts right,  you contacted her both times when the item did not arrive? or did she contact you to let you know she was running behind?


I don't think I would have left a negative just yet as the pony has not arrived yet. I would have given it this week to arrive. It is shipping first class.

I contacted her both times, and it has been a week from last Monday.

[Stormy31685]

Sometimes first class can take a little longer to arrive.  Considering Easter was the 31st, it is possible she (or he) had family in town for the holiday.

Many seasoned sellers use the internet to print shipping labels, but an individual or casual seller may still go to the PO to ship, and the tracking service is nearly a dollar extra.

An extra week might have cleared things up.  Then again, you might be completely right about your seller. 

[TwilightOwl]

While the delay in shipping is certainly not ideal, and frustrating, I would at least wait and see if the item shows up before I left feedback. First class can take longer than it feels like it should and I always give two weeks (once I've been notified that it has shipped) within the US (even if I'm anxiously tapping my foot the entire time). That being said, honest feedback is important! Personally, if it does show up I'd be more likely to leave neutral feedback and explain why. I reserve negative feedback for people who ignore communication, intentionally decieve, or are just plain mean and deceitful. In the end it is your call though, and I hope everything works out for you! 

[Icecrystalline]

I know it can be soooo frustrating.... I had it recently, but the seller had literally just lost a close family member who had died and I was so wondering where the item was until they said someone had died. It can be frustrating, but the circumstances need to be considered. I don't think you were 'unreasonable' I just think maybe a little too quick to post a neg?
Please don't worry about being 'unreasonable' I just felt it was the *for lack of better words...* lack of patience maybe.


I think the seller was fine. She was running a little late yes, but patience is needed in situations like that. Yes, occasionally I get sellers telling me the same thing, but I think patience is needed in a situation like that. I just feel it wasn't necessary to leave a negative feedback so soon. Personally, I would've waited and if you had a problem, contacted a moderator for help. I don't think it's fair to jump at leaving a neg so quickly, someone could've died or anything, and if *pray it never does happen* and you're in the same situation but are the seller, you need to understand how they are going to feel, personally I feel the neutral was actually fine, since she could have left you a negative. Sorry to sound mean, but I never jump to leaving feedback until is is very necessary. I wish you both luck in sorting this, maybe something can be done to help you both, and I don't want to seem mean, I'd just like to stress that, it's just that, if someone has died, all hell can break loose for the person who is dealing with it, I know, my grandma died 2 years ago and I still haven't fully recovered from it.

[apanda0622]

I know it can be soooo frustrating.... I had it recently, but the seller had literally just lost a close family member who had died and I was so wondering where the item was until they said someone had died. It can be frustrating, but the circumstances need to be considered. I don't think you were 'unreasonable' I just think maybe a little too quick to post a neg?

I think the seller was fine. She was running a little late yes, but patience is needed in situations like that. Yes, occasionally I get sellers telling me the same thing, but you need to be patient in a situation like that. I certainly feel it wasn't necessary to leave a negative feedback so soon. Personally, I would've waited and if you had a problem, contacted a moderator for help. I don't think it's fair to jump at leaving a neg so quickly, someone could've died or anything, and if *pray it never does happen* and you're in the same situation but are the seller, you need to understand how they are going to feel, personally I feel the neutral was actually fine, since she could have left you a negative. Sorry to sound mean, but I never jump to leaving feedback until is is very necessary. I wish you both luck in sorting this, maybe something can be done to help you both, and I don't want to seem mean, I'd just like to stress that, it's just that, if someone has died, all hell can break loose for the person who is dealing with it, I know, my grandma died 2 years ago and I still haven't fully recovered from it.

I guess I am just more upset over her attitude that comes off as not caring than the item.  I left feedback negative because of the slow shipping and her attitude, and I would left negative if this happened on ebay.  If the item does come, I would consider contacting a mod and changing the feedback to neutral.

[Icecrystalline]

I know it can be soooo frustrating.... I had it recently, but the seller had literally just lost a close family member who had died and I was so wondering where the item was until they said someone had died. It can be frustrating, but the circumstances need to be considered. I don't think you were 'unreasonable' I just think maybe a little too quick to post a neg?

I think the seller was fine. She was running a little late yes, but patience is needed in situations like that. Yes, occasionally I get sellers telling me the same thing, but you need to be patient in a situation like that. I certainly feel it wasn't necessary to leave a negative feedback so soon. Personally, I would've waited and if you had a problem, contacted a moderator for help. I don't think it's fair to jump at leaving a neg so quickly, someone could've died or anything, and if *pray it never does happen* and you're in the same situation but are the seller, you need to understand how they are going to feel, personally I feel the neutral was actually fine, since she could have left you a negative. Sorry to sound mean, but I never jump to leaving feedback until is is very necessary. I wish you both luck in sorting this, maybe something can be done to help you both, and I don't want to seem mean, I'd just like to stress that, it's just that, if someone has died, all hell can break loose for the person who is dealing with it, I know, my grandma died 2 years ago and I still haven't fully recovered from it.

I guess I am just more upset over her attitude that comes off as not caring than the item.  I left feedback negative because of the slow shipping and her attitude, and I would left negative if this happened on ebay.  If the item does come, I would consider contacting a mod and changing the feedback to neutral.

That's completely understandable If the attitude was out, then I understand, but her attitude could have been affected by the situation. I sympathise with you both though, but I think the slowness would be due to the situation. I hope nobody died, I hope everything works out. I'm sure you'll get your item soon, have faith

[Sarahlacewing]

Two weeks to ship is not ideal, so I can understand why you were concerned. I admit I am guilty of late shipping because things come up occasionally. Maybe she would be willing to refund part of your shipping costs for your trouble? Accurate feedback is so important. If you've done everything you can to try to work things out but you still just feel negative or neutral about the transaction, then it's important to note that in feedback. Many people don't for fear of retaliatory negative feedback, which does happen unfortunately.

[Icecrystalline]

Two weeks to ship is not ideal, so I can understand why you were concerned. I admit I am guilty of late shipping because things come up occasionally. Maybe she would be willing to refund part of your shipping costs for your trouble? Accurate feedback is so important. If you've done everything you can to try to work things out but you still just feel negative or neutral about the transaction, then it's important to note that in feedback. Many people don't for fear of retaliatory negative feedback, which does happen unfortunately.

This is a brilliant idea!

[ponylady]

I do no think you were unreasonable. I understand that family does come first and different situations arise but a little communication can go along way. It would not have taken much to drop you a quick PM to keep you in the loop of what was going on. 

As far as First Class it can be slow sometimes but I honestly would think it would be there by now if it was shipped last Monday/Tuesday. Since there is no tracking number can she perhaps show a receipt to prove when the item was actually shipped? It would probably also give you a piece of mind that it is on it's way.

[svleonard]

No, you were not unreasonable.  There is no point in having a feedback system if people aren't allowed to leave negative feedback for bad experiences.  I'm sorry that she gave you a neutral feedback. 

[nhal039]

I don't think you where unreasonable at all, you kept up good communication and wait for enough time for leaving feedback. I totally agree with svleonard and ponylady. Actually to be honset I have my doubts it was even sent