Children these days.

[TrixieStix]

And some of these kids dress like adults. But, my son doesn't see that. You know what my son sees? He sees a girl in clothing with a Mario plush toy... and she's his friend.
I may think a child is dressed inappropriately, but if that same child is going to be friendly with my son and treat him like he isn't different (because he is aware of it), then so be it. I'll invite her over to play with him any day she'd like.

You're spot on! Kids who treat other kids nicely, I would love to see more of it not just in children but teenagers and adults too.

<3    Kids definitely have their own perspective and it is one that hasn't been carved into a shame/judge attitude.
 
Actually I still see things much differently than other people!  I like to see all the different sides and perspectives of each issue that comes up and I tend not to sit on one side, but rather the all seeing fence. heee

That is what it should all be about.  We need to stop slut shaming and judging people because of clothing or sexual behaviour, and start treating them like human beings.  Just like everyone is. 

Human beings indeed! 

[LadyMoondancer]

Teen pregnancy has been going down decade after decade and, honestly, was quite prevalent in the 1940s, 1950s, etc.   Remember, also, that it used to be not uncommon for girls to marry younger--right out of high school, for example.  It's a lot easier to wait till marriage when marriage occurs shortly after your hormones kick in!

Would you really like teenagers of the 1940s or 1950s more than today's?  Would you still like them after a couple white teens explained their sincere belief that certain races are "inferior"?  Or that women who try to enter the workforce after WWII are "stealing jobs" from veterans and they should just get back in the kitchen where they belong?  Because it's not fair, you know, to only celebrate the good things about teens of previous decades while only looking at the bad things about teenagers of today.

In general, teenagers and kids that I've met today are fine.  There are some rude ones;  there always have been, in any generation.  There are also a lot of good ones, who volunteer (more than in my day) and care about the world they live in (more than teens of the Greedy 80s) and who have big dreams.  No, they are not perfect.  Who is?

Anyway, replace "those kids, always staring into SmartPhones" with "those kids, always hypnotized by the boombox" and, well, you have just parroted the opinion of a million parents critizing teens of the 80s.   The more things change the more they stay the same.

[Sarahlacewing]

Children are not sexually active creatures in my opinion.  I cannot agree with the folks who say it doesn't matter or it is setting a bad example that will stunt their sexual behavior later in life and cause repressed sexual feelings.  When children are emotionally mature enough to handle sex they should be well educated.  Sex is not a shameful or horrible thing.  But sex with a child is.  To me it is that simple.  Children should not be sex symbols.  Now I know everyone disagrees about when a person is ready for this stuff and I think that is because everyone develops at different rates.  Call me a prude all day long but I will never be okay with children being thought of in a sexual way by adults.

[Spike]

Children are not sexually active creatures in my opinion.  I cannot agree with the folks who say it doesn't matter or it is setting a bad example that will stunt their sexual behavior later in life and cause repressed sexual feelings.  When children are emotionally mature enough to handle sex they should be well educated.  Sex is not a shameful or horrible thing.  But sex with a child is.  To me it is that simple.  Children should not be sex symbols.  Now I know everyone disagrees about when a person is ready for this stuff and I think that is because everyone develops at different rates.  Call me a prude all day long but I will never be okay with children being thought of in a sexual way by adults.

You're right and that's exactly how I feel.

[DazzleKitty]

Just wanted to state that I am not a parent, but I still have my own opinions on things.

I read through most of these posts and I can say that I sympathize with those who have Autistic kids. My little cousin is Autistic and I have seen how many struggles my aunt has gone through with raising him. He's in his teens now and a lot more laid back, but while he was young he was prone to a lot of meltdowns.

I am pretty liberal about some of this stuff. I feel like preserving childhood is actually something that's pretty new in this world. People used to have babies young, especially girls.
Not to say that I think teens should get pregnant. In today's culture and economy, it's just too rough on the teen and the teen's parents.
I know when I was in my teens I was personally far to immature to raise a kid. I think with the changing cultures, it causes young people to mature less quickly. You were pretty much forced to grown up quickly in the olden times.

When it comes to young girls willingly wearing skimpy clothes, that's their choice. But I find it to be a little nasty that a lot of clothes for pre-teen girls are like this, as some of you have said that is all you can find. But if she wants to wear it? Then so be it.

What I DISLIKE about this is that it caters to the double-standard that women have to always wear skimpy clothes to be attractive so obviously you must have the body for it to.  And I will admit toys like the Bratz dolls also can instill these feelings. I really just hate how young girls are taught to hate their bodies. The world is a more judgmental place on women when it comes to looks.

Now a bout teen sex, this is my opinion. Please don't flame me for it. I feel like it's okay and healthy for teens to be interested in sex, experiment, and even engage in it. What I find wrong about this is that most teens won't use birth control. It's easily accessible yet so many teens fail at this. I think safe sex needs to be advocated more in school.

These are just my thoughts.

[Ivaness]

Dazzle, I agree with you on the sex part. I started at 16 and growing up, I was taught that it was something only married couples do.

If I had thought my mother was more approachable, I would have gotten on birth control and not had my son.

But, I'm glad I didn't. My son is huge blessing to me, Autism and all.

Parents need to step up and teach their kids about sex, and DEFINITELY about safe sex. It isn't the schools responsibility to teach kids about sex. Ugh.
I wish my mother had opened up more. (We learned about it at church, that you'd go to hell if you engaged in sex before marriage. Frightening stuff, that.)

[xeevee]

Children are not sexually active creatures in my opinion.  I cannot agree with the folks who say it doesn't matter or it is setting a bad example that will stunt their sexual behavior later in life and cause repressed sexual feelings.  When children are emotionally mature enough to handle sex they should be well educated.  Sex is not a shameful or horrible thing.  But sex with a child is.  To me it is that simple.  Children should not be sex symbols.  Now I know everyone disagrees about when a person is ready for this stuff and I think that is because everyone develops at different rates.  Call me a prude all day long but I will never be okay with children being thought of in a sexual way by adults.

I don't think anyone is saying that sex with children is good.  It has pretty much been proven to be harmful.  Some people said young kids chose their own clothes, and clothes that might been viewed as sexual by adults isn't how they view them.  When I was quite young I hiked my skirts up really high.  It had nothing to do with how I looked and everything to do with how easy it was to run around in them.

I also said that not letting your kids watch shows with some sexuality (I'm not saying you should let them watch R rated movies, more PG stuff) when you let them play super violent video games is so wrong.  You can stunt your kids sexuality if you act like sex is evil.

[melodys_angel]

Do you know when I was a kid, Kindergarten was half days? Yep.  Now we have kids in school at age two until 6pm. 

You are actually hitting a VERY sensitive point for me, and im sure others as well.  *Please* get your facts straight or think before posting <3

2 year olds arent going to 'school', kids dont go to 'school' until they are 4 or 5, depending on the region. Daycares are actually a very important part of helping with the childs development (did you know that the most critical time for learning is between the ages of 0 to 5? And that whatever happens in a daycare is supposed to maximize this?). I agree that its harder for parents to stay at home with thier kids and that raising their kids is a good thing (I was fortunate to have my mom with me and did not go to daycare...and like you I had 1/2 days in kindergarten)..but as stated above, your comment threw me right off.


Im not going to get into it since it will derail the topic, but I did need to point it out.

[DazzleKitty]

  You can stunt your kids sexuality if you act like sex is evil.

This is so very true, especially with young girls. Only in recent times have we been more accepting of women's sexuality, and I think it's an important path to keep traveling.

For example, my grandmother would never talk to my mom about sex. She was SO sheltered that she thought she was pregnant just by holding hands with my dad when they were teens and was very terrified she was going to be a teen mother. I personally feel a parent should be open about sex with their kids. My mom and I are quite open with each other about it.

[xeevee]

Melodys_angel, I agree.  I am actually an at home mum, but my son had some major developmental changes when we sent him to pre-school at 3.  It actually really annoys me that I can't send my daughter to child care or preschool because of cost.  I think she'd get loads from it.

[Spike]

Movies, magazines and music shape our children also. I was watching a documentary on Child Occult killers. This one child was a bright young student and was well behaved until he started listening to death metal and reading all sorts of occult books. How this kid murdered this girl, was a ritual he saw in a movie and copied it. He thought that if he did it, satin would accept him. Also stars in magazines really thin, almost anorexic etc.. Girls want to copy that. I see it, I know about it, I've witnessed it with one of my old friends. I remember her saying "I wish I was as thin as the Olsen twins." And what'ya know she became an anorexic.

Post Merge: December 07, 2012, 06:49:57 PM

  You can stunt your kids sexuality if you act like sex is evil.

This is so very true, especially with young girls. Only in recent times have we been more accepting of women's sexuality, and I think it's an important path to keep traveling.

For example, my grandmother would never talk to my mom about sex. She was SO sheltered that she thought she was pregnant just by holding hands with my dad when they were teens and was very terrified she was going to be a teen mother. I personally feel a parent should be open about sex with their kids. My mom and I are quite open with each other about it.

My mother NEVER spoke to us about sex until we had sexual education at school. I think sexual education is horrible because it was taught to us in grade 6. We shouldn't need to know about that at that age?! I didn't want to know ANYTHING about it so I remember always leaving the class when it was on. I came home asking my mother what a condom was, I remember her jaw dropped and she asked where I had learned that from. My mother would NEVER talk to us about it before that time. It was a forbidden subject, she acted as if it was evil indeed.

[StoryDreamer]

I love the argument that children will want to have sex if you give them condoms. And I'm not saying anyone is making that argument here! That's just one that um.. certain groups say. It's a stupid stupid argument.

I don't believe children should sexualize themselves. Teach a girl how to find her own self-worth in a way that is age appropriate AND healthy. I really can't believe that a 5 year old will wear a pair of pants that say "Juicy" on the bottom. I mean..really.

[LadyMoondancer]

Kids should definitely be educated about sex by sixth grade.   Many kids will have their hormones revving up by that point.

As far as knowing about sex, I knew about it in general terms by first grade, just from "playground talk".  The irony is that it was a private religious school that didn't have very extensive / good sex education, so a loooot of misconceptions persisted.  Two of my classmates got pregnant in eighth grade, and it was not even a very large class.

[Spike]

Kids should definitely be educated about sex by sixth grade.   Many kids will have their hormones revving up by that point.

As far as knowing about sex, I knew about it in general terms by first grade, just from "playground talk".  The irony is that it was a private religious school that didn't have very extensive / good sex education, so a loooot of misconceptions persisted.  Two of my classmates got pregnant in eighth grade, and it was not even a very large class.

I don't think they should be educated until about 15 years of age. 10 years old just seems too young to me

[BrightIdea]

Kids should definitely be educated about sex by sixth grade.   Many kids will have their hormones revving up by that point.

As far as knowing about sex, I knew about it in general terms by first grade, just from "playground talk".  The irony is that it was a private religious school that didn't have very extensive / good sex education, so a loooot of misconceptions persisted.  Two of my classmates got pregnant in eighth grade, and it was not even a very large class.

I don't think they should be educated until about 15 years of age. 10 years old just seems too young to me

I can see where you are coming from because 10 year olds aren't very physically mature. But around age 12/13 a lot of kids are experiencing puberty. I think kids should learn about sex ed/puberty while they are going through it, ie grade 6 or 7. This is when I learned about it, and it was great. I am very happy we were taught about these things at school. Sure it may be a little bit of an awkward topic to discuss, but even if a person is not going to use this puberty/sex information right away, they can remember it for when it becomes relevant.

Lots of young women have a mature body by grade 7, and need to know how to protect themselves.

In some places in the world, I don't believe they have sexual education. My husband went to school in the middle east around grade 8, and there were still boys in grade 8 there who absolutely had no idea where babies come from. I wonder when a boy like that would learn about the subject, possibly from talking to friends?

I think people who have the ability to reproduce should at least have the right to be taught that sex may lead to a life altering change.


Sorry for kind of derailing there, but back to the main topic: I don't think things have gotten worse with children over the decades. I think we are remembering things fondly from our childhoods, when we were busy with school, friends, and other activities and were not particularly concerned with such things as sexuality.