OUCH! Make me feel better, tell me about your fails...

[Gingerbread]

Had a bit of a fail earlier, I fell over at lunchtime and jarred my entire left side. My left wrist and left hip bore the brunt of it and now I'm confined to the sofa  I have severe FM so my balance is shot, hence me making a close acquaintance with the floor...

What have you done recently that was very stupid and ridiculously painful? 

[kaoskat]

I left a pony in the oven 10 minutes over time and went running to get it. I stepped on a blanket, went sliding and crashed into the table hurting my ribs.

[starrypawz]

You want fails, I can give you fails.
A recent one was my brother and I were in a pub getting some lunch (no booze though ) and instead of him paying for both meals, I paid for mine and he paid for his. I put my card into the chip and pin machine and then for some reason totally forgot I had done it so I was like 'OMG  WHERE'S MY CAAAARD!' and went through my wallet and then was like 'Oh yeah'.

And here's a few of the oldies but goodies of the blooper reel of my life

1. The Hot Chocolate Fail
On my first year of college at lunch one day I brought a hot chocolate,  it was a #'special' one with tonnes of cream, now until my last year the hot drinks weren't in insulate cups they were in just paper ones. And well the hot chocolate was essentially burning my hand, I dropped it right in front of the canteen windows, it lands perfeclty upright and a big hot chocolate fountain occurs

2. The Litter Tray Fail
Another college one. Outside the animal centre is a garden like area where we keep rabbits, guineapigs, ferrets and birds. Now in my first year the slope down to the mammal block was just a slope and had no steps. We had a cleaning practical and I was cleaning out the ferrets. They have a litter tray and so I was coming back with a nice cleaned out, refilled tray and went to go down this slope. I slipped, cat litter went EVERYWHERE and somehow all the mud deflected from my labcoat to my trousers.

3. The Fountain Fail
My local park has this big ornamental fountain. Once I was walking my dog and had a plastic football with me, it ended up in said fountain so I went to get it. I fell in.

4. The toilet fail
One year I'd gone to guide camp and had managed to injure my leg. A month or so after the accident my leg still wasn't much better so my mum took me to the doctors, I went to the toilet whilst waiting. And the door got stuck and I got myself locked in there, funny in hindsight although I did have a bit of a panic attack. O.o

I'm dyspraxic so there's plenty of fails to go around from me. I manage to injure myself in strange ways. Like recently I'd brought a bottle of juice and was shaking it up to get rid of the sediment. And managed to smack myself in the head with it.

[Skeen]

I'm not going to say what I was doing when I tore the cartilage in my hip, but yeah, I tore the cartilage in my hip.  Need surgery to fix it. 

At least I was certaily enjoying myself when it happened. 

[Syrcaid]

I'm so clumsy that I've put those baby corner guards on the coffee table only after I'd smacked myself into it so hard that I was bruised for weeks.  LoL  I've got corner foam guards on the bed frame, as well.  The bed ones were in place years before I had my baby. XDD

[Skeen]

Oh!  This one wasn't so much MY fail as it was the cat's, but I ended up hurt from it.

I have a railing/bannister around the stairwell that leads up to my office at home.  The cat likes to sit on it, and he likes to jump up there when I go past so he can get attention.  He's a show-off.  Anyway, as I was walking by he tried to jump up and missed, fell off, and tried to grab me on his way down.  I have a scar that runs the entire length of my calf now and it bled for HOURS.  OMG I thought I'd need stitches.  Every time I walked it opened it back up again.  That was a midnight bandaid run to Wal-Mart I don't think the cashiers there will ever forget.

The cat was fine, btw.  He was all, "I totes meant to do that.  Feel free to pet me now."

[melodys_angel]

Girl, if I started talking about every single time ive done something, you would think that you were invincible and would wonder how im still alive.

Theres a reason why everyone wants to wrap me in bubblewrap

[Gingerbread]

  and for all of you! I'm glad that it's not just me who can be a little special sometimes  although I have to add I answered the phone earlier today and bitchslapped myself in the face with it 

[Yurusumaji]

although I have to add I answered the phone earlier today and bitchslapped myself in the face with it 

I can't think of any "special" moments off the top of my head, except for one that happened years ago that was only partially my fault.

I was late for a class, this was in high school, and I saw my teacher in the hallway on my way in. Thinking myself sly, I booked it for the classroom so I could get there before her and she wouldn't mark me as being tardy to the party. Well, the butthole I had a crush on knew I was coming and he heard me bustin' a move down the hallway. When I went to turn the corner and go into the room, he stuck his foot out. I tripped on it and did a full-body flail into the rolling cart that held the class' overhead projector. I had a bruise down the entire left side of my left thigh for about a month.

Nowadays I bonk my head on cabinets and freezer doors a lot and generally putz around and do silly, uncoordinated things.

[lovesbabysquirmy]

I jumped up to answer the phone once, and as I was putting my weight onto an ottoman, the whole thing shifted and I went from vertical and cool to horizontal - flat on the floor with my face in the carpet.  OWWWWWW. 

[ZennaBug]

Oh god, I am so clumsy and accident prone!  My most recent was a burn on my knuckle making my husband some chicken nuggets so he'd have food when he got home from work.  *sigh*  I have funnier ones, but they aren't as recent.

[Rosencrantz]

Not recent, but it's a definite fail.

I'd just managed to spend my day being a proper adult, so I was rewarding myself with two bottles of my favourite soda! And as I was carrying the bag with the two glass bottles to the fridge, one suddenly exploded. And I was all, oh, gotta save the unbroken one...

Twice I shoved my hand into a bag of broken glass and soda before I was like, 'why does my hand hurt?'

[Sarahlacewing]

I have a lot of fails lately.  Today it was making hummingbird nectar for my Grams.  I'm not sure what happened... I just sort of lost my balance and fell over.  Luckily the whole thing is made with red food coloring so it got everywhere and looked like some kind of terrible humming bird related massacre.

[skyrocketneko]

The other day, I went to pick up my iPad, and I smacked myself in the forehead with its corner. I have a good sized black and blue mark now, and the iPad's corner is a bit different than the other ones.

[rybett]

OUCH!!!!!!!!!!  I stepped over a baby gate at work that was used to keep a small dog in one room.  So the thing was just propped, not secured.  Left foot catches it, I go tush over teakettle.  Ended up on my right hip on a cheap carpet over cement floor.  The part that still gets me is a co worker saw me on the floor, then just walked off.  Anywho, picture a 10 inch by 12 inch bruise on a skinny hip.  Had that sucker for close to a month.