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So last weekend we watched my nephews (ages 4 & 10). The 10-yr-old (who is from my SIL's previous relationship btw) refused to eat lunch so was rooting around in the pantry for food. When I found him, he had his hands in MY bag of cereal. This wouldn't be an issue if he ever washed his hands. So I told him he needed to just pour the cereal into a dish because when he touched his privates to pee and then touched the food, it got germs all over the food that everyone was supposed to eat.Apparently, this was too much truth for him to handle and after he got home he started crying and telling his parents that I was mean to him because I expect him to wash his hands after using the bathroom. Boo. Freaking. Hoo. I don't like crotch crusties in my cereal and in fact will not eat any of the cereal now (it was a brand new bag--I'd had 1 bowl) so maybe what I should have done was handed him the bag and told him it was his because his hands were too disgusting for anyone else to eat it. That would have been mean. And at 10 years old he NEEDS to start washing without someone standing there telling him to do it.
Quote from: Pokeyonekenobie on June 13, 2021, 04:39:47 PMSo last weekend we watched my nephews (ages 4 & 10). The 10-yr-old (who is from my SIL's previous relationship btw) refused to eat lunch so was rooting around in the pantry for food. When I found him, he had his hands in MY bag of cereal. This wouldn't be an issue if he ever washed his hands. So I told him he needed to just pour the cereal into a dish because when he touched his privates to pee and then touched the food, it got germs all over the food that everyone was supposed to eat.Apparently, this was too much truth for him to handle and after he got home he started crying and telling his parents that I was mean to him because I expect him to wash his hands after using the bathroom. Boo. Freaking. Hoo. I don't like crotch crusties in my cereal and in fact will not eat any of the cereal now (it was a brand new bag--I'd had 1 bowl) so maybe what I should have done was handed him the bag and told him it was his because his hands were too disgusting for anyone else to eat it. That would have been mean. And at 10 years old he NEEDS to start washing without someone standing there telling him to do it. This is why I'm glad none of my close relatives has any kids
Yeah, well he doesn't flush either which is how I know he doesn't use TP even on #2s! For years I've refused to touch bags of chips/popcorn/cookies after he's been over because of this issue. When my dad told me that my brother said my nephew was upset over the situation he talked to me about it and I told him what I'd said. My dad's response was "Well, if it's true, it's true." (Of course he thinks my nephew is an overdramatic spoiled little fart so I'm not surprised he would side with me.) Considering that the 4-year-old washes his hands, flushes the toilet and brushes his teeth without having to be told, it isn't too much to expect from the 10-year-old. My sister's kids are over for the summer so this nephew will be staying over again this week. We'll see if he remembers to wash his hands...
My eczema is horrible today. My hands feel like they are on fire. I used my medicine and it helped a bit but they still hurt.Ponyfan
Quote from: Pokeyonekenobie on June 13, 2021, 09:56:14 PMYeah, well he doesn't flush either which is how I know he doesn't use TP even on #2s! For years I've refused to touch bags of chips/popcorn/cookies after he's been over because of this issue. When my dad told me that my brother said my nephew was upset over the situation he talked to me about it and I told him what I'd said. My dad's response was "Well, if it's true, it's true." (Of course he thinks my nephew is an overdramatic spoiled little fart so I'm not surprised he would side with me.) Considering that the 4-year-old washes his hands, flushes the toilet and brushes his teeth without having to be told, it isn't too much to expect from the 10-year-old. My sister's kids are over for the summer so this nephew will be staying over again this week. We'll see if he remembers to wash his hands...How can his parents allow such behavior?
Quote from: SpacePinto on June 14, 2021, 05:54:32 AMQuote from: Pokeyonekenobie on June 13, 2021, 09:56:14 PMYeah, well he doesn't flush either which is how I know he doesn't use TP even on #2s! For years I've refused to touch bags of chips/popcorn/cookies after he's been over because of this issue. When my dad told me that my brother said my nephew was upset over the situation he talked to me about it and I told him what I'd said. My dad's response was "Well, if it's true, it's true." (Of course he thinks my nephew is an overdramatic spoiled little fart so I'm not surprised he would side with me.) Considering that the 4-year-old washes his hands, flushes the toilet and brushes his teeth without having to be told, it isn't too much to expect from the 10-year-old. My sister's kids are over for the summer so this nephew will be staying over again this week. We'll see if he remembers to wash his hands...How can his parents allow such behavior?He has ADD and they don't always make him take his meds especially in the summer or on weekends because he doesn't "need" them when he's not in school. So they write it off instead of insisting that he learn to do things or take his meds so he can "remember" to do things. If the meds make that much difference then they need to quit letting him not take them just because they don't want to make him.
Quote from: Pokeyonekenobie on June 14, 2021, 08:16:55 AMQuote from: SpacePinto on June 14, 2021, 05:54:32 AMQuote from: Pokeyonekenobie on June 13, 2021, 09:56:14 PMYeah, well he doesn't flush either which is how I know he doesn't use TP even on #2s! For years I've refused to touch bags of chips/popcorn/cookies after he's been over because of this issue. When my dad told me that my brother said my nephew was upset over the situation he talked to me about it and I told him what I'd said. My dad's response was "Well, if it's true, it's true." (Of course he thinks my nephew is an overdramatic spoiled little fart so I'm not surprised he would side with me.) Considering that the 4-year-old washes his hands, flushes the toilet and brushes his teeth without having to be told, it isn't too much to expect from the 10-year-old. My sister's kids are over for the summer so this nephew will be staying over again this week. We'll see if he remembers to wash his hands...How can his parents allow such behavior?He has ADD and they don't always make him take his meds especially in the summer or on weekends because he doesn't "need" them when he's not in school. So they write it off instead of insisting that he learn to do things or take his meds so he can "remember" to do things. If the meds make that much difference then they need to quit letting him not take them just because they don't want to make him.TBH when I read that I wondered if it was a problem sequencing behaviours, rather than necessarily something that medicine can resolve. But I don't know the kid. Just if it's an executive function issue, it may well simply be that his brain struggles to remember to do things in the right order, and things go missing.Since I was a kid I've always done my teeth etc in the morning/evening in the exact same process because my short term memory sometimes flips out on me and if I change up that routine I'm more likely to forget about it. The number of days I'm sure I've plugged in my internet...and actually haven't...or thought I locked the door...but actually didn't...I'm not sure what the solution is in practical terms, especially since it relates to his family and how they would want to handle it. But I feel like maybe an established routine would help him around toilet functions. As you said, as he grows, it's an increasing issue he's going to be much more hurt by going forward.Sometimes stuff like that seems like bad behaviour but it's not actually. I got told off a lot for not remembering to do things as a kid, as though I was doing it on purpose, so it's probable that he knows there's an issue...just not how to resolve it. Hence he reacted how he did, even though all you did was point out something reasonable. I remember being told off about stuff and feeling helpless because I didn't know how to fix that, but for my parents it was obvious how I should fix it (for example keeping my bedroom tidy), and so I'd keep getting in trouble for the same thing :/ I don't have ADHD as such, but I have worked with kids with ADHD and I know executive function issues can affect both ASD and ADHD, so it's just what immediately popped into my head. People with executive function issues have trouble sequencing actions or following them in a set order. For me it's organisation, cooking and navigating, but for him it may be personal hygiene. Just something that occurred to me.On a superficial note though. I shuddered.
Quote from: Ponyfan on June 14, 2021, 06:35:49 AMMy eczema is horrible today. My hands feel like they are on fire. I used my medicine and it helped a bit but they still hurt.Ponyfan Saaaaaame. I have a growing patch on my arm and today it's starting on my hand. Sometimes ice helps with mine, it pulls the heat out and makes it feel better.
i made some larger payments on my credit cards but somehow my credit score went down i hate debt.
Quote from: Beth3346 on June 14, 2021, 04:00:20 PMi made some larger payments on my credit cards but somehow my credit score went down i hate debt.Your credit score is a confusing thing. The only thing a credit score does is tell sellers & loan officers that you know how to make debt. Stupid, right? The more debt you have (if you make payments regularly) the higher your score. The less debt you have (because you are smart with your money) the lower your score. If you close a credit card or pay off a loan your credit score DROPS. But a low credit score means a loan risk so higher interest rate. So if you are smart with your money you are a loan risk based on your credit score. Does your head hurt yet?