Asperger's Syndrome and pony collecting...

[SaveThePonies]

My daughter has AS and it took a long time for her to get a diagnosis for her. I was accused for many years of wanting to put a "label" on her - which annoyed me a great deal. She has found it helpful to know how and why her brain seems to work "differently" to a lot of other people.
Understanding the weird things "normal" people think and say has helped her get along much better in her life.

Girls are diagnosed so much less (at least in the UK) because girls on the autism spectrum are much more social than boys for the most part, the "classic" traits are based on the original findings of Asperger himself.

There is nothing "wrong" with anyone on the Autism Spectrum and no-one should think there is. My daughter got into one of the top universities in the UK this year, she was helped by having her diagnosis, as teachers had to help her understand what they were saying. She is very intelligent, and her different perspective is very useful to her on many occasions So hang in there and if your GP doesn't want to refer you - you can now refer yourself to a Psychologist and ask to get a diagnosis xx

[Taffeta]

I don't know and really, I don't care. I am who I am, the way that I am. I don't need help, treatment, or to understand myself better. I'm good with the way I am, thanks. I have plenty of other issues and it took a long time for me to stop feeling like I was broken. I've been much better since I stopped letting people tell me I was defective and I'm not going back again now by looking up random internet sites telling me all the ways they think I'm broken.

Having a diagnosis of AS has nothing to do with being broken or otherwise. Obviously people with ASD are not broken. Idiots are always there, with their small minds, but let's be honest about this. People judge everything. The more insecure and stupid they are, the more they point fingers at other people. This is not about what other people think, though. It's entirely about self-awareness and self-identity.

Let me move back to constructive comment.

I was diagnosed in 2005. I had had a fight with a friend in which she had said some things that had jarred, and it had been the last straw, but my family and I had been considering that it was possible for a while before that. I was 23 when I was diagnosed. I'm 34 now.

Before I was diagnosed, a lot of my life was a lot more stressful than it is now. Not that life isn't stressful, but this is just how it worked out for me. It's not the same for everyone, because ASD is not the same for everyone.

It is true that girls get overlooked in diagnosis. This is not helped by stereotypical confirmations of what ASD is promoted by things such as the Curious Incident of the Dog in the Nighttime and the patronising and ignorant idea that chaos in a cinema is an Autism Friendly space.

There is a very good book called Aspergirls. I forget who it is by. Anyhow. Back on point.

Before I was diagnosed, I blamed myself for absolutely everything. I had been bullied in the pony community by a couple of people who I now know were evil trolls, but at the time I felt it was somehow all on me. I also created misunderstandings I could not resolve. I don't doubt that I'm still sometimes tactless and that I go off on tangents of rantage - but at least now I have a word that explains it.

And that is what ASD is. It isn't a solution, it doesn't change who you are, but it is a word people outside need to understand your perspective on common sense. I'm not saying that them knowing it makes them immediately accept you, or that it's even any of their business. But knowing you have that word is more precious than I ever realised. Having that word has allowed me to work around obstacles and get to where I want to be, instead of just giving up at the first hurdle, as I did before.

Before I was diagnosed, I struggled with the ideas of work and university. I had a complete breakdown and had to leave the dorm of a university after one night. I commuted my degree and never really integrated. I had no support so I couldn't find my classrooms. I felt very isolated, except for my family and my collecting community friends.

I had other similar incidents like it, culminating in the fight that led to me really pushing to get a diagnosis.

Since then I've gone back to uni, I've worked with kids with autism, I've held a job in a public service front-line environment and enjoyed it. I'm back at uni now. I have friends here, and I am ok. The world isn't perfect, and there are a lot of frustrations. But I have a life now. And it's the life I chose and the one I want to have. So even if bits of it frustrate me still, I am okay with it this way.

Being diagnosed gave me that door to realise that there wasn't something WRONG with me. There was something DIFFERENT and now I knew what, and could take ownership of it a bit more. If you know what you're dealing with, you can strategise a little more.

So back to the collecting. As I said before, I had some issues in the pony community years back with a couple of trolls who made my life hell. Because of that, I got a bit alienated from my collection for a while. But I found that collecting gave me a footpath into getting to know other people. Going to conventions. Meeting folk.

I think that there are quite a lot of pony collectors with ASD. As someone said, though, you can have elements of it without being diagnosed. And not all places will diagnose properly. I was lucky - my area was very proactive about it at the time, and my university are the most awesome place on the planet when it comes to support. Having supported Autistic kids and advocated for them for two years, I know that it's not always that fortunate, and sometimes families intervene and feel it's a stigma. What I learned from the kids I worked with was that there were still people closing off their world, but that it was the parents who did not want to look into a diagnosis who were really creating the biggest issues for their kids going forward.

ASD is not a stigma, but imo if you have ASD and you don't acknowledge it, you are asking for trouble in your mental health future. People who go on about finding a cure, or treating it like a disease are wrong. It's none of those, but it is something that is better off known than not known in my experience. The world is stressful, tiring and often illogical. Just understanding why that is is half of the battle, at least for me, even when I'm completely fed up with it all

But in terms of diagnosis, only look into it if you feel that it would make a difference to your life to have that knowledge.

[melodys_angel]

Right.

Please remember where this is posted and what the OP originally wanted.

Lets keep this civil and above all--light hearted <3

[applejackbunny]

Exactly, melody's_angel, and thank you : ) I am not forcing anyone to do anything...not even to reply to my post if they don't want to! 

[kaoskat]

I don't know and really, I don't care. I am who I am, the way that I am. I don't need help, treatment, or to understand myself better. I'm good with the way I am, thanks. I have plenty of other issues and it took a long time for me to stop feeling like I was broken. I've been much better since I stopped letting people tell me I was defective and I'm not going back again now by looking up random internet sites telling me all the ways they think I'm broken.

Having a diagnosis of AS has nothing to do with being broken or otherwise. Obviously people with ASD are not broken. Idiots are always there, with their small minds, but let's be honest about this. People judge everything. The more insecure and stupid they are, the more they point fingers at other people. This is not about what other people think, though. It's entirely about self-awareness and self-identity.

I think we have a bit of a misunderstanding here that I'd like to clear up before anyone else is upset by my post. I am NOT saying that anyone with any issue EVER is broken. That is absolutely NOT what I believe about others. I grew up in therapy for a myriad of mental issues and it made ME feel like I was broken and like I needed to be fixed. I do not like to feel that way. I was simply stating why I had no interest in looking up what it was to try to decide if I have the issue. It would not help me to go around looking for problems where I shouldn't, it would only make ME feel more broken. I understand I am different in plenty of other ways and I'm fine with being odd. I accepted it long ago. If it will help you, by all means look. It you have a problem, definitely get the information you need to take to your doctor and ask him or her about it. But no, I do not think anyone is broken, but I had to overcome FEELING like I was. I'm sorry if I made anyone think I thought that about them, that was not my intent at all. I was only stating my feelings about myself and my feelings about myself are rarely reflective of my feelings regarding others. I judge myself much more harshly than I do the rest of the world.

[FantasticFirefly]

Wow. Timely posting. I was discussing this with my spouse recently. He keeps bringing up things that make him wonder about me. on a online test I did score far higher for atypical then neurotypical traits. My spouses test mostly neurotypical. I do question though if there is any relevance to my life at this point of getting tested? Would it help another little girl who shared my struggle through school be identified earlier? would it change my life for the better in any way? would I be wasting an experts time? My mother thinks this is not my issue. while my brother delayed in speaking and regressed at stages I spoke early and they couldn't get me to stop talking about my interests. There was no issue with regression. And, eye contact and speaking on the phone with strangers are two things I have not needed for work thus far.

I did however have a lot of issues with peers and school, any change or social situations comments littered my report cards. I was obsessive compulsive and anxious. there was something "wrong" that I didn't jump in but observed until I felt I understood the "rules" first and this was identified as "needs improvement" so feeling like I did wrong was a regular event. I organized and rowed toys rather then playing with them another "bad" thing, always living "inside her head" . at 7 I was assessed by an education expert and a psychiatrist for many weeks. I was unable to write or spell at my age level. The assumption was I couldn't read, or read below kindergarten level. I scored the highest they had for the test for a child my age for reading comprehension and level (well into high school) I was left (well my parents) with no answers and continued struggling, constantly feeling like a "bad kid". While school itself was hit and miss, things were better in high school then grade school as I went to a quirky art school and being a little socially awkward didn't make you stick out.

I have abilities that other people cannot comprehend. An example, Many years ago our 5 and 10 bills were changed. a fraudulent bill never made it through my till and I caught every single one. My boss kept trying to trick me with fakes in the back room. it was a fast paced job and the bill maybe was in hand for a second or two before being inside the till. The chance to look wasn't there. He tried to get me to explain to the staff on how to identify fakes by feel, and nobody understood how I did it, or what I meant with the examples in the meeting, I was treated as if I had some superhuman power. My OH first bought up that I was unusual when I did the same to him at a gas station. he gave me the bill from the teller and before putting it in my pocket I had it exchanged- it was off. her light showed what I told her. Fake. I am very sensitive to texture. I also still feel guilty for making my mother cry when she bought me a jacket for Christmas I just couldn't wear. Honestly, if I could I would have. the fabric and cut of the arms made my skin crawl. I get all my clothing in big garbage bags from friends and re-donate anything I simply can't  stand on my body. work myself up to a haircut every two years or more. have a thing about water tickling my face so wash parts separately. Some things I have issues with, my brother is far more mellow about.

Collecting, my interests made me feel like a bit of an outsider within a group of people with the same hobby as they were "esoteric". I have versions of ponies most collectors do not consider getting as a separate example and am specific of pieces the truly correct items as accessories with a pony. I have a tomb in my ponyroom of logs of my collection and a detailed checklist I made myself. Things I commit to memory are different then collectors I have met and become close real life friends with I was called a walking ponypedia.

My brother has autism. he is classified as non verbal and honestly, he's one person I am most comfortable being around. We get along splendidly because I never interrupt or surprise him or change plans. things are explained ahead of time, not because someone told me, but I don't like it and from the meltdowns he would have with my parents I felt he didn't either.

Perhaps try an online test and bring the results to your GP is you are concerned. I just touched on a couple items that have made people ask about me who have known me well. Also speak to your parents, perhaps they have information you do not remember to bring to your doctor that would be of interest.

[Tak]

 I'm not upset in any way. I just wanted kaoskat to know that not everyone thinks that way. Everyone deserves to feel what they feel.

Fantasticfirefly: I think your superpower is awesome. 

[Taffeta]

. while my brother delayed in speaking and regressed at stages I spoke early and they couldn't get me to stop talking about my interests. There was no issue with regression. And, eye contact and speaking on the phone with strangers are two things I have not needed for work thus far.

I spoke at ten months. I read at 2. I added up road speed signs in my head at 4, without anyone teaching me maths. I could write at 4, too. I had a much broader vocabulary than anyone else I went to school with before I even went to school. And I have always talked a lot about stuff xD.

With HFA students and Aspie students I met, I haven't yet met one who went through any kind of regression. I think that tends to happen with more severe or non-verbal types of autism.

Communication is an issue but its an issue in different ways for different people. Girls are generally more communicative and better at mimicking, anyway - but being verbal doesn't determine yes or no with this. Especially when a lot of the diagnostic stuff is based on guys, still, and a lot of 'expert' opinions are flawed because the bulk of data has come from guys. As I said before, the Aspergirls book is worth a read, even if just a casual one. I haven't found much else that's really girl-Autistic centric...

[applejackbunny]

I don't know and really, I don't care. I am who I am, the way that I am. I don't need help, treatment, or to understand myself better. I'm good with the way I am, thanks. I have plenty of other issues and it took a long time for me to stop feeling like I was broken. I've been much better since I stopped letting people tell me I was defective and I'm not going back again now by looking up random internet sites telling me all the ways they think I'm broken.

Having a diagnosis of AS has nothing to do with being broken or otherwise. Obviously people with ASD are not broken. Idiots are always there, with their small minds, but let's be honest about this. People judge everything. The more insecure and stupid they are, the more they point fingers at other people. This is not about what other people think, though. It's entirely about self-awareness and self-identity.

I think we have a bit of a misunderstanding here that I'd like to clear up before anyone else is upset by my post. I am NOT saying that anyone with any issue EVER is broken. That is absolutely NOT what I believe about others. I grew up in therapy for a myriad of mental issues and it made ME feel like I was broken and like I needed to be fixed. I do not like to feel that way. I was simply stating why I had no interest in looking up what it was to try to decide if I have the issue. It would not help me to go around looking for problems where I shouldn't, it would only make ME feel more broken. I understand I am different in plenty of other ways and I'm fine with being odd. I accepted it long ago. If it will help you, by all means look. It you have a problem, definitely get the information you need to take to your doctor and ask him or her about it. But no, I do not think anyone is broken, but I had to overcome FEELING like I was. I'm sorry if I made anyone think I thought that about them, that was not my intent at all. I was only stating my feelings about myself and my feelings about myself are rarely reflective of my feelings regarding others. I judge myself much more harshly than I do the rest of the world.

I am simply asking, out of curiosity, how many other fellow pony collectors feel that they may have, or know that they do have, Asperger's Syndrome, as it is entirely new to me and I feel that talking to others here would help in all kinds of ways No one is forcing anyone to reply to, or even read my post if they don't want to.

Post Merge: March 13, 2016, 06:18:24 PM

Perhaps try an online test and bring the results to your GP is you are concerned. I just touched on a couple items that have made people ask about me who have known me well. Also speak to your parents, perhaps they have information you do not remember to bring to your doctor that would be of interest.

Your skill with the fake notes is really interesting - thanks for that!

Yes, I took an online test and it confirmed that I have AS. I'm not sure how accurate those online tests are, so I will take it with me, but I will definitely see a professional before assuming I am AS.

As for my parents...I'm pretty sure they will be clueless about this!

[Koudoawaia]

You're absolutely right that there are positive traits to it. Those of us with Asperger syndrome tend to have a high vocabulary and be very intelligent and the thing that's our main focus (for me it's always been my art) we excel at. The heightened senses part of it that cause anxiety have made me wish I didn't have it but my husband and mom both have said that it's part of what makes me who I am and I wouldn't be me without it and they are right. I can't stand to be crowded. I need a lot of personal space and it's horrible the amount of people that don't respect another person's personal space. I am extremely sensitive to fragrances. They can cause me to feel sick and an overexposure to things like perfume or laundry detergents/cleaners have made me actually get a sore throat. Last time I used Clorox wipes to clean in my bathroom, the scent stayed for days and I ended up with strep throat. I take my headphones and mp3 player with me wherever I go because I can't stand loud noises and drowning it out with music helps. So yeah. That can make  life hard and since I work with retail, those anxieties get triggered an awful lot. They're awfully good at accommodating meat work  though. An official diagnosis will help people help you and it's great to hear that you're going to look into getting one. Also coming up with your own coping mechanisms for the anxieties that come with it helps too and I'm sure you already have them.

[Hannah66665]

My therapist diagnosed me with Asperger's Syndrome a year or so after I told her I thought I might have it. At first she was positive I didn't have it but after getting to know me and some of my habits/quirks she said it sounded right. I haven't been able to see my therapist in a couple years due to no insurance and I'd really like to get a second opinion from another professional. I really want to believe I have it. I know many people do not like 'labels' but it would bring me so much peace of mind. I first heard about aspergers from an online friend many years ago that has it. When I brought it up to my family nobody took me seriously, especially my brothers. I was told that no, I'm just lazy and then they sat and made stereotypical 'retard' jokes. I've been told by my doctor that there is nothing mentally wrong with me. When she heard about my trying to get on disability she told me I just needed to get a part time job. I've wanted to reach out to others with it in the past but I've always been too nervous. I'm afraid that maybe my therapist was wrong and I don't have it or that I don't fall on the autism spectrum at all but I struggle with so many things. A lot of the most common traits I don't really relate to, though... I've heard that usually people on the spectrum have select interests while I have almost too many? I am constantly jumping from one interest to another and I am not good at being organized at all though I want to be. I can't bear to part with anything either... but there are the certain sounds and fabrics I absolutely cannot stand like others have mentioned. My hardest struggle is finding foods that I can stand to eat. Don't really know where I'm going with this but I'm glad this thread was made. ^^ I'm sorry if my post is too OT though. In regards to collecting ponies and toys my room is full of them and so is the garage.

[Strawberry Swirl]

See as an autistic person whose main special interest is MLP collecting I  L O V E knowing that I'm not the only autistic here!! It's just so awesome!!

But yes, here I am, I was diagnosed ~3rd grade because of issues with a very specific teacher but I didn't really understand what was different about me until I was dang near 17 years old. As a kid, I knew I 'had Asperger's' because that was my diagnosis specifically and my parents always kept me informed. But it didn't mean anything to me. It was just, hey, I'm Sapphire and I have Asperger's!

When I was 16 I came into contact with older teens and adults that used the internet to talk about their lives and experiences with being autistic. It really opened my eyes that, yeah, I'm autistic. I have sensory processing issues. Sometimes I need a break from people and sit in my room so I can baby-talk my scary looking Pokemon. And that's ok! I'm very happy that happened because I feel like otherwise I'd see my situation like a curse almost. Like "no, I'm not in immediate danger or anything but I still believe that allistic = ideal."  :cloud:

Lucky me I have wi-fi.

Post Merge: March 14, 2016, 01:46:38 AM

If you want to look into it, I 100% recommend Amythest Schaber, aka Neurowonderful, who does Ask an Autistic videos on YT.

Ooooh this too. ^^^^^

Amythyest is really sweet, their videos taught me a heck of a lot and helped my parents understand more too. ;)

[lostpony]

I am simply asking, out of curiosity, how many other fellow pony collectors feel that they may have, or know that they do have, Asperger's Syndrome, as it is entirely new to me and I feel that talking to others here would help in all kinds of ways No one is forcing anyone to reply to, or even read my post if they don't want to.

I've always known there is something different about me that has given me some academic advantage but has made it hard for me to fit in and deal with change.  My mom knew it too and helped me more than I can know.   

The more traits I learn about, the more I think possibly yes.  Likely.  Hypersensitivity to perfumes is one of those traits?  I didn't know that.  I have that one very much.

I have been noticing since signing up for the Arena a month ago that several people with this sort of diagnosis seem to be here.  I have been pondering that.  It seems to make sense.  I need to learn more about this. 

I am grateful for this thread.  I'll check out the resources posted here.

[Tak]

I am simply asking, out of curiosity, how many other fellow pony collectors feel that they may have, or know that they do have, Asperger's Syndrome, as it is entirely new to me and I feel that talking to others here would help in all kinds of ways No one is forcing anyone to reply to, or even read my post if they don't want to.

I've always known there is something different about me that has given me some academic advantage but has made it hard for me to fit in and deal with change.  My mom knew it too and helped me more than I can know.   

The more traits I learn about, the more I think possibly yes.  Likely.  Hypersensitivity to perfumes is one of those traits?  I didn't know that.  I have that one very much.

I have been noticing since signing up for the Arena a month ago that several people with this sort of diagnosis seem to be here.  I have been pondering that.  It seems to make sense.  I need to learn more about this. 

I am grateful for this thread.  I'll check out the resources posted here.

Love your post. I have so much trouble communicating sometimes. 
 AS is often mis-diagnosed as add or adhd. Especially in adults or by the narrow minded. My little brother exhibits all the symptoms. Sensitivities, lack of social understanding, and high intelligence. He taught himself how to read by just after two, writing and fourth grade math at three. He used to fall asleep each night reading scientific American magazines. I think he was five when he took apart a rotary phone and put it back together. He's a certified genius now. Yet he's just now learning how to microwave and use a toaster oven.

Had to modify because I forgot my point! He collects, too, and is rather obsessive about the electronics set up in the house.

[Koudoawaia]

My therapist diagnosed me with Asperger's Syndrome a year or so after I told her I thought I might have it. At first she was positive I didn't have it but after getting to know me and some of my habits/quirks she said it sounded right. I haven't been able to see my therapist in a couple years due to no insurance and I'd really like to get a second opinion from another professional. I really want to believe I have it. I know many people do not like 'labels' but it would bring me so much peace of mind. I first heard about aspergers from an online friend many years ago that has it. When I brought it up to my family nobody took me seriously, especially my brothers. I was told that no, I'm just lazy and then they sat and made stereotypical 'retard' jokes. I've been told by my doctor that there is nothing mentally wrong with me. When she heard about my trying to get on disability she told me I just needed to get a part time job. I've wanted to reach out to others with it in the past but I've always been too nervous. I'm afraid that maybe my therapist was wrong and I don't have it or that I don't fall on the autism spectrum at all but I struggle with so many things. A lot of the most common traits I don't really relate to, though... I've heard that usually people on the spectrum have select interests while I have almost too many? I am constantly jumping from one interest to another and I am not good at being organized at all though I want to be. I can't bear to part with anything either... but there are the certain sounds and fabrics I absolutely cannot stand like others have mentioned. My hardest struggle is finding foods that I can stand to eat. Don't really know where I'm going with this but I'm glad this thread was made. ^^ I'm sorry if my post is too OT though. In regards to collecting ponies and toys my room is full of them and so is the garage.

When my mom first introduced the idea that I might have it to me, my reaction was, "So /that's/ what's wrong with me."  It does bring peace of mind. I always had felt kind of off.