Healthy Pony Jan 15-March 15 come join us!

[Crowning_Glory13]

I wish I could say I had a good day. I did work out on my break, but I also over ate and made myself sick. I learned from a different source that I did not get a job, so I feel it was very rude....I am being harrassed at my job....its bad. I should press charges but too scared to. So job searching and a move in May:( lots of stress.  Slowly working on making my own income. I feel so depressed and frustrated:(

Post Merge: January 29, 2020, 05:47:16 AM

Started depression eating....wish I could stop but right now it keeps me from crying at work.

Sorry to be a downer...just trying to document in Hope's of helping myself out of it or releasing the stress. Want to go home sick so bad...sigh.

[Pokeyonekenobie]

  Being harassed at work sucks.  I've been there so I know first hand how hard that is.  When I quit that job I gave a 25 page (typed) complaint to HR and told them I was done as of that second.  It's the only job I ever quit without notice.  And they made life harder for me by flat out telling me that I should be grateful to work there because no one else would ever hire me.  If they're telling you stuff like that it's all lies to try to control you. 

The advice I can give is that if you do decide to press charges, make sure you're documenting everything.  Keep looking for an out and take it when it shows up.  Working a job that makes you miserable isn't worth a second of your time or a penny of the pay.  Even if you have to go somewhere like McDonald's for a few months, it's better than being treated like crap.  I've worked at McDonald's before and while the work itself wasn't my favorite, the people that I worked with were great and that counts for a lot and it pays the bills until something else comes along.

You can do it!  Just keep swimming and Keep Moving Forward!  These road bumps do not define you and you will be stronger for them!  Find a pillow and punch it when you get home.  Do primal screams in the car.  Imagine being able to tell your boss to kiss off when you get that new job.  You might have to tolerate the jerkfaces at work but you don't have to let them control any part of your life.  Just keep reminding yourself that this is a temporary annoyance and you are above them and their petty ways.   

   

[Crowning_Glory13]

Thank you. I needed to read this. I know I will find better work it's just so hard to keep going. My eating disorder is a bear when I have to wait for change. I just hope my documenting will help be more mindful and looking to punching pillows instead. Thanks for the great words.

[Crowning_Glory13]

I have been doing the work out. But I am also overeating and purging. 3 days so far. My bribe and goal is to get it under control again. If I do I can buy a Powder. I have been obsessed with her. Just have to manage my stress better. I am taking steps and it will be slow but I hope these steps will help me to not fall back into this issue.

If I piano this weekend I can reward myself with yarn!:)

[Crowning_Glory13]

Weekend went ok....not much piano as I hoped. No binge and purge, but this Sunday was another story. With the looming work week it's just a mix of depression and other emotions that I want and have grabbed at thing. I have started job looking. No matter what I have to move by May. Our apartment lease is up and we cant afford another year. Lots if stress, but I hope more things will come our way. I still try the positive.

I know I will get better once in a better work environment. The move will have it's own struggles, but I am up for that!

Wanted to do some contests as they make me feel happy, but currently I feel so down I couldn't keep up. Sigh.

I know I am all negative and no one likes it, but I pour my heart out here and once in awhile I see the world positively again. I know I will have happy posts someday

[Crowning_Glory13]

Not a vast improvement but I am functionally more positive and feeling relieved as I look at potential jobs. I hate moving, but the things that will come from the move will help. I am 99% sure this will be the last move!

I just function my day just knowing my last day is coming soon.

Piano and knitting needs some work yet. If I keep up the positive I get to do the vintage store on Friday! Powder is still my goal and so are the drink and wet sets. I have the purple one.

Just typing this fills me with hope. The binge and purge will stop and I will go back to not doing it ever again. I was free for 8 years until now! So I know I can see a way to calm the stress and be normal again...well as normal as pi y collector can be:)

[Pokeyonekenobie]

You can do it, CG!

[Crowning_Glory13]

Thank you. I have a huge headache from a lack if sleep and still looking up and forward. Thank you for the cheer!

[Crowning_Glory13]

I have less purge but my intake is stupid high. So trying to get ideas to help out. I work in a school and required to eat with the kids. I know I hate wasted food and tend to eat more. But the recovery is slowly on way... even with the bad day. Friday could be questionable....but I just keep going. Hope's to be doing more knittings just no time:(

[Crowning_Glory13]

Weekend is going ok, but l have low stress and I can relax. Sunday night gets worse. But I have a list of fun this I will do on Sunday. It's more projects needed to get finished, but excited to do them. I have a piano piece to set up for my final music recital this April! It's sad to leave these kids again, but working under my current studio's policies is not helping my stress. I am slowly improving, but it's the motivation of leaving the job. The emotional side is bad. I used to feel I could be Miss America to I am not good enough. My trials are just starting to build. I will reach them slowly.

[Crowning_Glory13]

I took a bit of a break...and hope to get it together.

Day 1. Got some fruit water to help. I will not binge and purge, I will keep my portions small, and I will work out on my break, and do what I can in piano as time allows.

If I win, I will play my video game as my prize:)

[Satin Slipper]

Crowning_Glory13. You could take a condensed version of what you documented to your Supervisor, Human Resources or to a lawyer.  Extremely hard to prove but worth a shot.  There shouldn't be bullies at work...

Good luck with your move and balancing everything...

[Crowning_Glory13]

Thank you, but I just keep my head down and keep applying. I know by May I wont be there any more, so that's my light.

Not much to go, but I just cant keep up:( but at least I tried and I will keep trying:)

[glitterball]

CG, sorry to hear that you are going through a depressing time at the moment 

Yes, document everything, forward any upsetting emails to your personal account, collect evidence... meanwhile, keep plodding onward and just think about the day that you will leave!

A few weeks ago, I started something free called "Couch to 5k". It is a plan devised to help folks who have never ever done a "run" to slowly build up their stamina and run 5 kilometres (approx 3.25 miles) non-stop.  There are 3 runs per week, each session about 30 minutes, with at least 1 day off between runs to recover. 

After doing each run, I find I get a burst of "feel good" all through my body and it helps clear my mind somewhat.
Maybe this could be a free tool for you to use to help cope with your stress?

There are lots of free podcasts online that have your coach telling you when to walk and run, all the lessons are worked-out and pre-recorded so that all you need to do is listen on your headphones as you run. The only equipment you need is a pair of running shoes (and a decent sports bra!).

My first session involved me doing intervals of 60 seconds running and 90 seconds walking - wow, that was hard work but I managed it! As of yesterday, I ran two lots of 8 minutes and felt better than in my first lesson, so the fitness builds up quickly!

I hope you find some peace! Stay strong! 

[Crowning_Glory13]

I hate running, but maybe I can try this....I would like to at least run from danger if I needed to:)

Thanks glitter ball