The Trivial Complaints Thread ... #3

[Taffeta]

Thanks folks.

As horrible as the world events are, I find it's possible to ration how much of that news I take in at any one point.

It's harder to get away from the Government's direct and explicit attacks on disabled people.

I really don't want to bring the full rant here, but it is cowardly and disgusting. If they want to save taxpayer's money, maybe stop giving large chunks of it to private enterprise endorsed by colleagues and start thinking about how to fix the NHS and other vital social services. NOt to mention recruitment. If you want disabled people in work, start doing something about accessibility.

There's also no law in this country designating that hate crime against disability exists. Only against race, gender and sexuality. So people can do and say what they like and call it 'free speech', so long as they don't commit another crime like assault.

In London, in one twenty four hour period I overheard two discussions on buses which used derogatory language about autistic people.

I also overheard one autistic lad trying to explain to his friend what a meltdown was and why he was so angry with another friend for falsely accusing him of something. And I really felt for him and his future.

All in one 24 hour period.

I actually never hear comments like that here where I live. It did rather shock me, honestly...it reminded me how so many folk seem to believe we exist on another plane and don't hear/feel comments people make about us. I also don't go around eavesdropping on bus conversations, but it's hard not to hear people yelling or having loud phone conversations.

[BlackCurtains]

My day is off to a great start.

Aster puked on the bed.
I bit the inside of my cheek and now every time I chew I bite it again.
I slept funny on my left wrist and it's all swollen and hurts.
I'm depressed. I've been taking my medicine but I'm having a low time.

[Beth3346]

BC and Taffeta

I don't feel well today. i'm considering taking a sick day but i always feel guilty for taking sick days since I work from home.

[Pokeyonekenobie]

So, for some reason this morning whenever I would search on Google it defaulted to Bing...from Google Chrome.  A web search on how to fix it was basically useless (change your default--Chrome is already my default; select your default search engine--Google already is; it might be malware, buy our software to find out--it's a work computer so I have no control over their security software) so I cleared my browser history and that seems to have fixed it for the moment.  I really hope it was the result of the IT people doing some updates that they conveniently didn't tell us about and not something worse like the internet wants me to believe.

[Ponyfan]

I still can't bring myself to make that WYP topic, I'm still too sad. 

My dream vacation is a trip to Disney World.  I joined a Facebook group that I thought would cheer me up a bit while I hope to go there someday, but  it's full of people that are either at the park or planning a trip to the park.   I like reading their posts, but it makes me want to be there even more.


Ponyfan

[Lady Frostbite]

I need to get up for work in 5 hours  I don't want to go back to work, I am doing chores and writing, I NEED more time off!! Someone come and do my job for me!!!

[Ponyfan]

I feel absolutely horrible.  I've been on antibiotics for a week and still feel bad.   

I'm so mad at my dad right now.  He asked me for help with his email and somehow it got locked. I went to find him to ask him for his phone and he had gone somewhere.

Why ask for my help if you're going to run off and not wait for me to actually help you?

It turns out that he went to put gas in one of the cars. I finally got him back in to his email. 

The "Rainbow Bridge" poem made me cry. 


I went to Hot Topic today and it felt like I was in a store that was about to close down.  There were very few Funko Pops (the main reason I went to HT in the first place) and most of the ones they had were really old from months or almost a year ago.  I also only saw one or two Strawberry Shortcake things and no Sailor Moon stuff.


Also, I wanted to order something from Amazon, but it sold out before I could.  I don't know if it will be restocked or not.

Ponyfan

[BlackCurtains]

Ponyfan That poem makes me cry every time.



My mom has been really snippy with me lately. I told her I was having stomach problems and haven't eaten today. She said have some toast and I told her I didn't have any bread. She started at me, saying I make bad choices when buying groceries and every one has to have bread and I'm a "meathead". Like, I don't always eat bread? In fact, unless it's good bakery sourdough bread I never have it. It's not like I make sandwiches each day or... whatever people eat bread with. I eat more tortillas than bread

[Kitcatepic]

I actually never hear comments like that here where I live. It did rather shock me, honestly...it reminded me how so many folk seem to believe we exist on another plane and don't hear/feel comments people make about us. I also don't go around eavesdropping on bus conversations, but it's hard not to hear people yelling or having loud phone conversations.

i'm so tired of overhearing my classmates use the r slur like its just a normal swear

[Taffeta]

I actually never hear comments like that here where I live. It did rather shock me, honestly...it reminded me how so many folk seem to believe we exist on another plane and don't hear/feel comments people make about us. I also don't go around eavesdropping on bus conversations, but it's hard not to hear people yelling or having loud phone conversations.

i'm so tired of overhearing my classmates use the r slur like its just a normal swear

That's because to most people it is still a normal swear, because offensive ableist language doesn't get called out as much as other offensive terms do. We still have a long way to go, but it makes me twitch whenever I see or hear it.

That and when people use autistic as a slur word on its own. I only ever visited Brony forums about twice, on both occasions they were littered with ableist slurs against autistic people and the r word, and so I never went back again.

My rant for today is decorating.

My parents are having the hall, stairs and landing done.

This was meant to happen while I was away, but it got rescheduled.

The guy is a good guy, he's been here before, but this is going on right outside my door, a lot.

I'm sensitive to noise and paint smell. I also am not massively a fan of getting changed when there's a strange man outside in the hall stripping off wallpaper.

I have asked repeatedly to be informed when he is going to be working outside my room and three days in a row now I have got either inaccurate information or it's just been changed without anyone telling me.

Yesterday I went out after it had been agreed a lot of work would be done outside my room. As I was coming home, Mother told me by text it had been done already. I had a 4 minute train connection and I bust my lungs running to get that connection so I could make the bus home. Our bus from the station currently only runs once every ninety minutes, so that's another tight connection.

Then when I get on the second train, gasping for breath, I get a text saying it hasn't been done after all. If she told me correctly, then I could have saved my lungs and killed time in that town, but too late.

Then today I was told he was working downstairs all day. Until he wasn't, and turned up upstairs without any warning this afternoon.

I am so sick of being told one thing and then it being changed. I get it's their house, but is it too much to just ascertain information and convey it correctly so I know what's going on and can adjust accordingly?

[BlackCurtains]

I've been doing these little sheep doodles on another site that has ponies. I was doing them for free, but a friend poked me and said I should open a shop (it would be for game currency) so I asked for a price check. A couple of people have been very rude in my thread. Saying that anyone can draw a blob or glowing line and get lots of the game currency for it. That people like me who aren't artists make REAL artists feel bad. Blah blah blah.

I wrote a reply back, but decided to delete it and just say to the one person maybe they aren't as good of an artist as they think.

I AM an artist. I just work mainly in 3D. Drawing digitally isn't something I'm great at but I think my little doodles are cute and people seem to like them.

Everyone else in the thread has been very supportive and gave me a good range of what to charge if I open a shop. I'm just feeling bummed people had to come in and say things like that. I mean, if you wouldn't pay that price, fine. Say that. Don't dis my me and doodles.

A sample of said doodles for those curious:

Spoiler

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[Ponybookworm]

The doodles are cute!!! Ignore the naysayer, though it's hard to do. They'll learn in time that puttinmg people down is not a good way of helping fellow artists. As an amateur artist myself (amateur customising, a bit of knitting, a bit of crocheting, a bit of doodling...), I get how cruel peeps can be to somebody who's not a professional. Fortunately here, including the couple of times I've been on Art Challenge, everybody has been so warm & encouraging!!! Same wi the sharky server xxx

Taffeta, unfortunately tradies aren't too forthcoming about their own timetables, & throughout my bathroom renovation they've come when I wasn't expecting & not come when I was etc, so there's little anybody can do in such circumstances...

And to everybody hating ableist slurs, I'm with you xxx

[lovesbabysquirmy]

Ableist language and actions really bother me because it really puts self-created limits on what people think they can do.  It's like the Down Syndrome awareness PSA :  "if you think I can't ______,, then you don't treat me like I can ______, and then I don't ______." 

I know quite a few people who could probably be quite self-sufficient, contribute to the workforce, and be more independent, but it doesn't fit their family and support providers' narratives and definitions, so they think they can't work  or shouldn't work.  To the best of your ability, I say!  If you need supports, then by all means, use them, but don't opt out of doing things "because you can't (because you believed someone telling you that)".

Technology advances all the time - if there are now mechanized suits (like in anime), you can walk and lift and exercise!  Japan has several cafes that have robots that are operated by paraplegic people at home, using special headsets that connect directly to their brains .  if you need a service animal to help detect if you're going to have a medical episode, that's totally fine.  if you need a communication device/speech board/etc. , that's no different than the millions of other humans who can't get their face out of their phone LOL  It's no reason to opt out of society, hide yourself away, and be lonely. 

[Taffeta]

I've always considered it a 50/50 balance. 50% of my disability is me managing the things my disability causes, and 50% is dealing with barriers and obstacles in society that I don't have any control over.

I don't think it's a choice to opt out of society. I think a lot of disabled people are locked out of it by societal expectations and norms.

Just as an example, I can't navigate. GPS doesn't help me because it's designed for people who understand navigation. I'm entitled to a mobility car but I can't navigate so what's the point in that? I had to fight for a bus pass - I'm not entitled to one of those automatically, despite having full points for navigational issues. I rely on a bus service that stops before 6 in the evening, does not connect to local trains and has limited other bus connections. It limits where I can get to, and where/what hours I can work. It prevents me joining any local societies because I can't get there.

I'm the kind of person who pushes those limits. I still manage to go out. I get places. I work out ways to deal with the issue. But it's time consuming, mentally draining, and it doesn't solve the bigger problems relating to better job options, which is my main concern right now (I have lost two or three job opportunities in the last few months because of transport and the location. I lost one in COVID for similar reasons. But until I have a better job, I can't move to a place with a better bus route. And so the cycle continues.

Technology is great when it helps people. I'm not knocking that. But it's not all about physical or tech aids. It's mostly about people changing their attitudes and making processes more generally inclusive.

And even when tech is helpful, it has to be available, which in many cases it is not.

[lovesbabysquirmy]

I've always considered it a 50/50 balance. 50% of my disability is me managing the things my disability causes, and 50% is dealing with barriers and obstacles in society that I don't have any control over.

I don't think it's a choice to opt out of society. I think a lot of disabled people are locked out of it by societal expectations and norms.

....

Technology is great when it helps people. I'm not knocking that. But it's not all about physical or tech aids. It's mostly about people changing their attitudes and making processes more generally inclusive.

And even when tech is helpful, it has to be available, which in many cases it is not.

I completely agree!  If people would just stop creating obstacles and barriers for others.  Find out what people need to succeed and support them with that!  And access to these supports is totally vital.

I also struggle with navigation - my husband gets so angry when he tells me to turn left and somehow I turn right!  LOL  Definitely don't tell me to go east/west/north/south or we will never get to the destination!  Say, "Turn left at the McDonalds"  or "see that big tree, the NEXT street, go there"  My grandma had this problem too - she would enter the highway going the wrong direction and end up in a different state and have to find an exit ramp and turn around...