The trivial complaints thread

[Einhornbaby]

While my Mom recently died of cancer (in such a painful way I wish nobody else to experience) Im still fussing about a dentist appointment which is today (half an hour to go)... gosh, Im pathetic.

[Taffeta]

While my Mom recently died of cancer (in such a painful way I wish nobody else to experience) Im still fussing about a dentist appointment which is today (half an hour to go)... gosh, Im pathetic.

So this happened a few days ago, but I was waiting at the bus stop for the bus back from the carboot sale.
THis guy and his daughter and grandson are there waiting too.
He sees I have a bus pass and he looks at me and then is like, "don't people ever challenge you or look at you funny because you have a disabled bus pass and you're young?" And I said, no, nobody ever has. And he grinned at me and tapped his old person's pass and said, "I bet they do, behind your back. I earned mine."

Not sure how being old is earning a bus pass, given that unlike him I can never drive, and unlike him, I'm literally in danger because of my inability to navigate, so buses are my lifeline.

Spoiler

Example, same bus route, when parents were visiting - bus ignored the stop I wanted and stopped at the next one. I flat out panicked because I had no idea how to get back to the stop I wanted and to the destination we needed because the bus had turned a corner and it threw my navigation completely. Fortunately parents were there so it was fine, but otherwise who knows.

People who make visual assumptions are not cool in my book. My navigation is so bad that if a landmark changes I don't know where I am, or sometimes I can be on a bus route I know and look out the window and recognise nothing. Only London buses tell me where I am at every stop so I tend to remember stop names in order so I know where to get off and when I'm getting close.  When I tell people I can't navigate they're often like, oh yeah, I'm bad at that too - but it's not like that. I'm physically incapable of forming routes or sequences, so it's not "oh, I get a bit lost but GPS can help". It's I can't read maps, can't tell left from right, can't orientate myself, can't follow ambiguous signposts, and if I turn around I might completely forget where I came from or how to get back. And even if I know the area I can still get completely lost within a hundred yards, because if my brain resets a route, I don't know where I am.

My parents have lived in the same area for almost 30 years. If I want to go for a walk beyond the local shop, 4 mins away, my sister or one of my parents have to go with me. The one time I tried to go on my own recently I got lost and it took me 30 minutes to find my way back. I was about 6 minutes from home at the time and I grew up here. Even the walk I took to school for 5 years every day now throws me because the school got demolished so now I no longer have a landmark to fix on.

It already bugs me that people don't realise how serious that is if you don't have something helping you (like I use buses).

Yet apparently I shouldn't have a bus pass, because I didn't 'earn it'.

The article about the winning joke at the Fringe Festival reminded me of this experience, and makes me realise yet again that disability is still treated as a joke or an attempt to get special favours, rather than an actual life challenge.

Fortunately at the time I was so stunned by what he said I kind of dismissed it. But it only really dawned on me later the implications of what that guy said, and when I told my parents they were really angry since they know how much I fought to get that bus pass (it took me 2 years and a ton of evidence, I didn't just get given it for having a few birthdays).

By his standards, I definitely 'earned it'.

[Pokeyonekenobie]

While my Mom recently died of cancer (in such a painful way I wish nobody else to experience) Im still fussing about a dentist appointment which is today (half an hour to go)... gosh, Im pathetic.

So this happened a few days ago, but I was waiting at the bus stop for the bus back from the carboot sale.
THis guy and his daughter and grandson are there waiting too.
He sees I have a bus pass and he looks at me and then is like, "don't people ever challenge you or look at you funny because you have a disabled bus pass and you're young?" And I said, no, nobody ever has. And he grinned at me and tapped his old person's pass and said, "I bet they do, behind your back. I earned mine."

Not sure how being old is earning a bus pass, given that unlike him I can never drive, and unlike him, I'm literally in danger because of my inability to navigate, so buses are my lifeline.

Spoiler

Example, same bus route, when parents were visiting - bus ignored the stop I wanted and stopped at the next one. I flat out panicked because I had no idea how to get back to the stop I wanted and to the destination we needed because the bus had turned a corner and it threw my navigation completely. Fortunately parents were there so it was fine, but otherwise who knows.

People who make visual assumptions are not cool in my book. My navigation is so bad that if a landmark changes I don't know where I am, or sometimes I can be on a bus route I know and look out the window and recognise nothing. Only London buses tell me where I am at every stop so I tend to remember stop names in order so I know where to get off and when I'm getting close.  When I tell people I can't navigate they're often like, oh yeah, I'm bad at that too - but it's not like that. I'm physically incapable of forming routes or sequences, so it's not "oh, I get a bit lost but GPS can help". It's I can't read maps, can't tell left from right, can't orientate myself, can't follow ambiguous signposts, and if I turn around I might completely forget where I came from or how to get back. And even if I know the area I can still get completely lost within a hundred yards, because if my brain resets a route, I don't know where I am.

My parents have lived in the same area for almost 30 years. If I want to go for a walk beyond the local shop, 4 mins away, my sister or one of my parents have to go with me. The one time I tried to go on my own recently I got lost and it took me 30 minutes to find my way back. I was about 6 minutes from home at the time and I grew up here. Even the walk I took to school for 5 years every day now throws me because the school got demolished so now I no longer have a landmark to fix on.

It already bugs me that people don't realise how serious that is if you don't have something helping you (like I use buses).

Yet apparently I shouldn't have a bus pass, because I didn't 'earn it'.

The article about the winning joke at the Fringe Festival reminded me of this experience, and makes me realise yet again that disability is still treated as a joke or an attempt to get special favours, rather than an actual life challenge.

Fortunately at the time I was so stunned by what he said I kind of dismissed it. But it only really dawned on me later the implications of what that guy said, and when I told my parents they were really angry since they know how much I fought to get that bus pass (it took me 2 years and a ton of evidence, I didn't just get given it for having a few birthdays).

By his standards, I definitely 'earned it'.

I'm sorry.  It's none of his business what you had to do to "earn" the right to not be confined to your house. 

Spoiler

Usually when people try to use age as a reason for anything (like thinking they deserve respect when they're acting like [words I'm allowed to use here]), I tell them that the only reason they're older than me is because their parents had sex first and that's no reason to respect them--it isn't like they were involved--and given their behavior I doubt that their parents are worthy of any admiration when they clearly had no business reproducing in the first place.  (I'm not very nice when people make me mad. )

Trivial complaint for this morning: I have no desire to be at work today.  No reason.  I just don't feel like doing anything.  So we'll see if I actually manage to get anything done. 

[Ponyfan]

The 2 Japanese songs I wanted to buy on iTunes are not on US iTunes.

Ponyfan

I feel your pain.
I'm usually amazed when one of the tunes I want IS on Itunes, and I don't have to plough through either auctions or amazon.jp and sell my soul.

I found something that I would love to own but since it's from Japan and has to be imported I can't really afford it right now. There are a few songs Japanese songs on US iTunes but they are mostly from the Ghibli movies or Sailor Moon.

The 2 Japanese songs I wanted to buy on iTunes are not on US iTunes.

Ponyfan

I identify with this too! I love German and Hungarian musicals. I can usually find the German ones, but Deezer (my go-to for listening to music) doesn't seem to have heard of Hungary....
Then of course my favourite Hungarian actor releases a CD and it's not available to buy internationally :cries:. I must stop loving such obscure things!!

I'm not sure how iTunes decides what they have in the store for purchase. If I want something from the Ghibli movies or the entire script from the musical Les Misérables in French I can find that on iTunes easily but not the Japanese songs I'm looking for. Now it's 3 Japanese songs that  I want that are not on iTunes. 

So this happened a few days ago, but I was waiting at the bus stop for the bus back from the carboot sale.
THis guy and his daughter and grandson are there waiting too.
He sees I have a bus pass and he looks at me and then is like, "don't people ever challenge you or look at you funny because you have a disabled bus pass and you're young?" And I said, no, nobody ever has. And he grinned at me and tapped his old person's pass and said, "I bet they do, behind your back. I earned mine."

Not sure how being old is earning a bus pass, given that unlike him I can never drive, and unlike him, I'm literally in danger because of my inability to navigate, so buses are my lifeline.

Spoiler

Example, same bus route, when parents were visiting - bus ignored the stop I wanted and stopped at the next one. I flat out panicked because I had no idea how to get back to the stop I wanted and to the destination we needed because the bus had turned a corner and it threw my navigation completely. Fortunately parents were there so it was fine, but otherwise who knows.

People who make visual assumptions are not cool in my book. My navigation is so bad that if a landmark changes I don't know where I am, or sometimes I can be on a bus route I know and look out the window and recognise nothing. Only London buses tell me where I am at every stop so I tend to remember stop names in order so I know where to get off and when I'm getting close.  When I tell people I can't navigate they're often like, oh yeah, I'm bad at that too - but it's not like that. I'm physically incapable of forming routes or sequences, so it's not "oh, I get a bit lost but GPS can help". It's I can't read maps, can't tell left from right, can't orientate myself, can't follow ambiguous signposts, and if I turn around I might completely forget where I came from or how to get back. And even if I know the area I can still get completely lost within a hundred yards, because if my brain resets a route, I don't know where I am.

My parents have lived in the same area for almost 30 years. If I want to go for a walk beyond the local shop, 4 mins away, my sister or one of my parents have to go with me. The one time I tried to go on my own recently I got lost and it took me 30 minutes to find my way back. I was about 6 minutes from home at the time and I grew up here. Even the walk I took to school for 5 years every day now throws me because the school got demolished so now I no longer have a landmark to fix on.

It already bugs me that people don't realise how serious that is if you don't have something helping you (like I use buses).

Yet apparently I shouldn't have a bus pass, because I didn't 'earn it'.

The article about the winning joke at the Fringe Festival reminded me of this experience, and makes me realise yet again that disability is still treated as a joke or an attempt to get special favours, rather than an actual life challenge.

Fortunately at the time I was so stunned by what he said I kind of dismissed it. But it only really dawned on me later the implications of what that guy said, and when I told my parents they were really angry since they know how much I fought to get that bus pass (it took me 2 years and a ton of evidence, I didn't just get given it for having a few birthdays).

By his standards, I definitely 'earned it'.

I'm so sorry that happened to you Taffeta. I don't like it when people make assumptions like that about people.  A family member of mine has a lot of back and knee problems but she has had people give her looks that say "You're fine, why do you need a motorized cart" if she tries to use one.

While my Mom recently died of cancer (in such a painful way I wish nobody else to experience) Im still fussing about a dentist appointment which is today (half an hour to go)... gosh, Im pathetic.

  I'm sorry for your loss. I never enjoy going to the dentist either.


Ponyfan

[Taffeta]

Whenever I go to a Japanese event it's always the first thing I check, whether the songs are on itunes. If so, then I don't need to pay exhorbitant prices for the CD, but if not...:/

[Broken Irishwoman]

Okay, WHAT'S with Etsy? I wanted to message a seller about an item, and now I just get a useless chat window? Seriously, get lost! I want to be able to write a proper message, and now I can't even use enter for blank lines, because enter means sending the bloody message! I'm fuming, really!

[tailrustedtealeaf]

Turns out I have to play around with my fall semester schedule a bit more because the shuttle from this campus to main does not align with the class at all. Sigh.
I'm a transfer and all the classes were chosen in March, so we all get the scraps. I don't want to be a part time student this semester but I'm going to have to dig super deep to find a class I can take that aligns with my schedule. Sigh sigh.

[BlackCurtains]

My depression has been hitting me hard lately  

[Nemesis]

Migraines. Again. I’m so tired of dealing with them... I’ve been losing a lot of sleep lately.

Taffeta: That’s awful. That guy had no right to say that to you... I would have totally told him off. I will also likely never be able to drive, though you certainly can’t tell that by looking at me. People are so terribly ignorant, sometimes... You would think that in this day and age, there would be more awareness that not all impairments/special needs are overtly visible.

My depression has been hitting me hard lately  

I’m sorry to hear that. Depression sucks, I know... I hope you can take it easy for a while and focus on your health. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

[Beldarna]

Today marks the one year anniversary when I had to say goodbye to my feline companion Tarzan. I can't stop crying

[Taffeta]

Thank you people
@Nemesis, I'm sure you've probably had your share of similar experiences. It's not that the guy meant it to be mean, just ignorance. Assumptions. And this idea that disability can be joked about, unlike race, or sexuality, which still causes massive inequality BUT is generally not considered something you joke about or comment on if you want to be seen as a decent human being.

 The winning joke at the Fringe Festival makes fun of Tourettes syndrome. Kind of illustrates the world we still live in, and my bus experience also kind of feeds into that as well. A white person can't make jokes about a black person without being called racist (and quite right too), but a nondisabled person can make fun of disability and get a reward for it? Why is that ok?

The bus guy's attitude was exactly the same thing. "It's not a big deal so I can joke or comment about it." Well, yes, actually, it is.

People are hypocritical and ignorant when it comes to these things.

@Pokey - I wish I had the courage to say that to a random stranger xD. As if it's not annoying enough here at the moment dealing with a large number of bigoted older people forcing us down a path to destroy our economic futures while telling us that we don't understand anything...this was just the icing on the cake for me. Apparently in entitled old people world, this stuff is acceptable.

(And both my parents are older, and would never act like this, so I'm not for one minute generalising all old people. Just the entitled ones who think that they still know better about everything, when they don't.)

@Beldarna I'm sorry

@Black Curtains - I hope you feel better soon :/

[SpacePinto]

I wanted to complain a little but seeing so many people with problems much bigger than mine right now I think I'd better keep it to myself for a while.

[Ponyfan]

Once again the pharmacy is out of the prescription I need. I am about to change pharmacies because this happens almost every time I need medicine.


Ponyfan

[AvianWing]

Well, looks like I gotta prepare for another one of these blasted hurricanes.

[Beldarna]

Please tell me I'm not the only one who always gets forgotten in the medical fields!? I've had it pretty much all my life. The number of times my dentist or optrician has walked by me sitting outside of their office asking me if I had had any help and I answer with "no I'm just waiting for the appointment with you, the one scheduled half an hour/ 45 minutes/ an hour ago" is beyond the number of fingers on my hands. One time I was sitting in the waiting area at my new healthcare clinic since a move and it was 20 minutes past my appointment when a man walked by and went out from the building, returning 45 minutes later and after another fifteen minutes came out to the waiting area and called for me. Yes, my new doctor had gone for a lunchbreak during my appointment, having me waiting for more than an hour. I switched clinic after that.
The newer new clinic is a bit better but I have been hold up there as well. I know some appointments can take longer than the alloted times delaying the rest of the appointments but once the doctor started to call out for people that came in after me!

Anyway, the reason I'm ranting now is that in MAY I got a letter from the doctor from the pain clinic (who also forgot to call me one day for an update which she had promised), a letter she also had sent to my GP with a list of diagnosis or possible diagnosis that needed deeper examinations (another CT scan being one of them (after my last scan, they forgot to call me with the result by the way, I was promised a call after a week, after three weeks I called them)) that my GP would have to do. She had even written down the exact wording on the referal he needed to send. Since then I have been waiting for a letter from the healthcare clinic for a date and time where me and GP would go over the letter together. Given the fact of summer and vacations slow things down, it's now the END OF AUGUST so yesterday I decided to call the clinic and the receptionist apologized for them missing me and said that my GP was prettymuch fully booked for a number of weeks but since I had been waiting for so long she wanted to talk to him to see if they could fit me in somewhere anyway. She promised to call me back in the afternoon, which she never did. I was glued to the phone the entire afternoon, barely even went to the toilett in case she would call. Stupid thing is this exact scenario has happened before and I'm getting pretty badword sick of it.