Problems with an eBay Seller -- am I being unreasonable? *UPDATED*

[MoondancerMilkyWay]

what a jerkface. if he wanted them to sell for more, put a reserve on it! what an asshat.

[sunshine29102]

Oh, I also forgot to mention the seller responded to my earlier message about inflating the shipping costs to compensate for the low sales prices, to which they replied that the ponies belonged to their son when he was a child, and that he died suddenly, and they were not trying to make money off of their son's death.  I want to be sympathetic, but if you weren't trying to make money off of their son's possessions then they wouldn't have listed them in the first place.  It just gets weirder and weirder. 

I did not respond at all, by the way.  Just wow!

[brighteyes]

  That is just... very strange.  Very sad if he's telling the truth, but it sounds more like some random thing he threw out there to guilt you out.

[ClosetAvalanche]

I'm sure I'm going to have the unpopular opinion here, but...

Sellers are not obligated to combine shipping and he seemed willing to work with you. Shipping prices also include handling such as supplies, time and don't forget ebay charges a fee on shipping monies received. I don't see why you would penalize him for communication when you seemed to be in contact regularly. Where the ponies received in the condition stated? If so, you've gotten a refund, so I think it would be fair to leave pos feeback.

[bluerose9978]

I'm sure I'm going to have the unpopular opinion here, but...

Sellers are not obligated to combine shipping and he seemed willing to work with you. Shipping prices also include handling such as supplies, time and don't forget ebay charges a fee on shipping monies received. I don't see why you would penalize him for communication when you seemed to be in contact regularly. Where the ponies received in the condition stated? If so, you've gotten a refund, so I think it would be fair to leave pos feeback.

I have to agree with CA. It seems the seller may be a newer to selling and may not have been too familiar with shipping methods. I would cut the guy a break and give him positive feedback with some dings to stars, especially if you were happy with the ponies (you said they were with few flaws and had accessories and you practically got them at a steal). It also sounds like you're almost trying to take advantage of him and not the other way around.

[sunshine29102]

I'm sure I'm going to have the unpopular opinion here, but...

Sellers are not obligated to combine shipping and he seemed willing to work with you. Shipping prices also include handling such as supplies, time and don't forget ebay charges a fee on shipping monies received. I don't see why you would penalize him for communication when you seemed to be in contact regularly. Where the ponies received in the condition stated? If so, you've gotten a refund, so I think it would be fair to leave pos feeback.

I can see your point, CA. I know that he was not obligated to combine shipping, which was why I messaged him well ahead of the auction's end to ask if he would do so, and also asked what the cost would be.  When he didn't respond with a combined shipping estimate, I politely messaged him and let him know what amount the USPS shipping calculator estimated -- again, before the auction ended.  The problem was that he immediately sent an invoice for a shipping cost of $16 after stating he would combine shipping. I had to ask him if that was the "correct, combined" shipping amount, to which he revised the invoice to read "$12.35 shipping charges".  When the item arrived, postage cost was less than $2.  I find it hard to believe that his "handling" fees would cost an additional $10 (he charged $12.35 for shipping when he "combined" the shipping).

As far as the ponies go, I was very pleased with them.  I did let him know that.  I did, however, politely communicate to him that I was highly disappointed to find that postage cost $1.88 and arrived in a bubble mailer when he stated that for $12.35 they would arrive in a box.  He said the envelope cost $2, also.  So, shipping and handling cost him about $5.00 (technically only $3.88 but I was rounding up to be generous).  I don't think that was being unfair in relaying that concern to him.

But as far as communication, I definitely see your point and am inclined to agree with you about that.  Perhaps a penalty on that end is unwarranted.  He definitely deserves a ding for his shipping costs, though.  We may somewhat disagree, but I think as a buyer/seller, it is important to leave HONEST feedback, and his shipping charges were honestly inflated. 

I'm sure I'm going to have the unpopular opinion here, but...

Sellers are not obligated to combine shipping and he seemed willing to work with you. Shipping prices also include handling such as supplies, time and don't forget ebay charges a fee on shipping monies received. I don't see why you would penalize him for communication when you seemed to be in contact regularly. Where the ponies received in the condition stated? If so, you've gotten a refund, so I think it would be fair to leave pos feeback.

I have to agree with CA. It seems the seller may be a newer to selling and may not have been too familiar with shipping methods. I would cut the guy a break and give him positive feedback with some dings to stars, especially if you were happy with the ponies (you said they were with few flaws and had accessories and you practically got them at a steal). It also sounds like you're almost trying to take advantage of him and not the other way around.

Please don't take this the wrong way, but I was in no way trying to take advantage of this seller.  I bid on some auctions and won them at a low price -- much lower than I thought I'd pay for them.  And isn't that what every buyer on eBay hopes to do, especially with an auction (regardless of the item up for sale)?  So I don't feel bad about winning the auction at a low price.  I definitely don't feel like I was taking advantage of him just because I got a good deal.   

As far as selling goes, if he wanted to make more money, he could've listed them as "Buy it Now", or "Best Offer", or auctioned them and included a "Reserve Price".   I don't feel like questioning his combined shipping charges was unwarranted.  I do see your point, though, and perhaps this seller was/is new.  But, that doesn't excuse them from familiarizing themselves with the policies/charges from selling on eBay/using Paypal for payment.

Thanks to both of you for allowing me the opportunity to view the situation from the seller's standpoint though. I hadn't really considered the points you brought up, until you did so.  Thank you for helping me view both sides of the fence!

Regarding feedback:  I have been giving the situation a few days to "diffuse" before leaving feedback.  I want to leave HONEST feedback regarding the transaction.  I will definitely dock the appropriate stars re: shipping.  Again, I have not left feedback yet, as I have been debating how/what to do/say). After consideration over the past couple of days, I have decided NOT to leave negative feedback.  As a buyer, I have probably left negative feedback maybe less than 5 times for sellers since joining eBay in 2005.  Sellers tend to get penalized worse than buyers do when using eBay, I've learned. 

Thanks again to all of you for your input on the situation!

[bluerose9978]

Less than $2 for 3 big brothers? I'm sorry but I'm a seller and that is impossible. They weigh about 5 oz each in a bubble envelope and that's more than $2.50 for one.

[sunshine29102]

Less than $2 for 3 big brothers? I'm sorry but I'm a seller and that is impossible. They weigh about 5 oz each in a bubble envelope and that's more than $2.50 for one.

The postage cost stamped on the envelope itself was $1.88. I took a photo of it.

[bluerose9978]

And you didn't have to pay extra postage when it arrived? Someone didn't weigh it

[sunshine29102]

And you didn't have to pay extra postage when it arrived? Someone didn't weigh it

No ma'am, I didn't.  My mailman just handed it to me at the door.  Perhaps his PO worker entered it incorrectly when shipping it out, but it was marked $1.88.

[bluerose9978]

And this is why the USPS is losing so much money. Because at that weight it should have been at priority prices and been close to $5 or more. And a $2 envelope plus $1.88 and he's charging you $12+ is silly. He should have gotten back home and refunded you probably $6+

[sunshine29102]

And this is why the USPS is losing so much money. Because at that weight it should have been at priority prices and been close to $5 or more. And a $2 envelope plus $1.88 and he's charging you $12+ is silly. He should have gotten back home and refunded you probably $6+

I agree.  He should've refunded the difference without me having to ask, since that's what he said he'd do.  Instead he provided a tracking number update to the item in eBay, and never mentioned the actual cost or mentioned a refund for the difference.  I had to question him on it when the mail arrived and I saw that the postage was only $1.88.  You can imagine my disappointment. He then stated that it included his "handling' fees.  After a few messages back and forth, he finally issued a refund. 

As far as I am concerned the transaction is closed now. I just haven't left feedback since I was debating what to say/how to say it. 

I am beyond pleased with the ponies (I even posted a brag thread, as they are my first G1 boys for my collection, and I LOVE them).  They are in better condition than listed, after some light cleaning.  But there is no way it would've cost what he wanted to ship them for ($12.35 from NY to SC).  The cost  for shipping was more than one of the BB ponies sold for alone.  I firmly believe he was trying to make up for the (perceived) loss he thought he took on auctioning the ponies without a reserve.

Oh well... it's done now.  

[bluerose9978]

I can understand a handling fee since eBay charges so many fees. But his fee was ridiculous and he should have been upfront about it. Thank you for being patient and re explaining some things to me. As a seller mostly I tend to side with sellers  because eBay never does. But I can see he was in the wrong and he took advantage of the USPS mistake and hoped you wouldn't notice.

[sunshine29102]

I can understand a handling fee since eBay charges so many fees. But his fee was ridiculous and he should have been upfront about it. Thank you for being patient and re explaining some things to me. As a seller mostly I tend to side with sellers  because eBay never does. But I can see he was in the wrong and he took advantage of the USPS mistake and hoped you wouldn't notice.

It's no problem.  As a seller myself, I have learned that sellers get little to no respect from eBay.  Buyers tend to get better treatment, since a seller cannot leave negative or neutral feedback for a buyer anymore.  And some buyers are, well, "difficult" to deal with.