Do you hold on to keepsakes from past partners?

[cuddlebuggy]

I still have a stuffed bunny that my first BF gave me. It's cute and while it does remind me of him, it was 20 years ago and I've no lingering feelings toward him at all. My husband would probably get rid of it if he knew. I have also come across letters and pictures (one a boudoir photo!) my husband has of some of his ex's. Strangely, I'm not really jealous. He told me to get rid of them but I put them all away together in a file in the back of the filing cabinet. Unless I die before him, he'll probably never find them again but it seemed wrong to get rid of them.
I suppose that's the main difference about whether or not it's appropriate to keep mementos is how you (or your partner) still feel toward that person and also how the items themselves affect you. Certain things would obviously provoke more sentimentality, and continuously reminding yourself of some lost love would certainly be difficult for a current partner.

[emery]

This is an interesting subject and I think that there can be so many different answers to this, none being right or wrong in general but being what is right or wrong for each person or situation.

For me I only had one serious relationship before I met my husband and it had been a long distance relationship before we met in person so a lot of what I had from him was letters and pictures that we had sent each other. We actually gave back any pictures that each other wanted and then I tossed most of the rest of it into a bonfire after we broke things off. I didn't get too hardcore about it though as he was in some photos that also included the rest of my family so I do still have those somewhere as it was a birthday celebration and I didn't do anything like cut him out of the pics. He had also given me a camera and I didn't trash it or anything. I do have to say I wasn't that sad when I lent it to someone and it got stolen though. So they got me a new camera and it was nice to have something fresh! I can see if it had been a really bad relationship or something where I might want to make sure every trace of him was removed from my life but we just ended up not really working out after we had spent time together in person for several months.

[InkyMomo]

My ex really seemed to "get me" in terms of gifts and stuff, so a lot of things he gave me over the years I have actually kept. I did get rid of any cards and letters he gave me though.

I have a few of his paintings still on the walls, as well as a few little painted figures like Munnys. The effort that went into these pieces alone is worth respecting even if our relationship did come to an end.

[MikeysGrrrl]

This is an interesting subject and I think that there can be so many different answers to this, none being right or wrong in general but being what is right or wrong for each person or situation.

You are absolutely right! There have already been so many responses to this thread and they are so varied. I love hearing the opinions of others and the reasoning behind their decisions. It was never about right or wrong (well, except for that scenario on the radio).

I think it's likely that I may have kept a book or photo frame that was gifted when I was younger, in all likelihood it was more like I forgot where it came from lol. Anything that would've held sentimental value to me (jewelry, letters, cards, photo's etc) was pitched or given back to the other person.

I realized having gone through all of my things that I didn't really become sentimental until I was with my husband. That's when I started holding onto everything (special rock from our first visit to Jones Beach, tickets from the first show we went to, menu from a restaurant we dined out at etc), We have an entire chest dedicated to all of those "special" things.

[PinkiePosh]

Nope! When a relationship is over, everything gets trashed (or donated).

Same, unless it was a gift I really liked. (Like a pony!)

[cobalte]

I've got a card, but I haven't been in any relationships since so it's a little different

Gifts and things I'm not really bothered about because I don't strongly associate the exes with those items. Plus it's not like 'THIS IS FROM X' is written all over it

[Koudoawaia]

I have a few Lion King plushies and a Lion King watch from past relationships. I keep them because they're Lion King related and my husband doesn't mind. Everything else gets thrown away if I come across it.

[snwbear24]

Yea I am def a person that holds on to things because i think I am part hoarder and don't like throwing things away! lol. But, my current bf found them and I think that the reason I still had them was because I just hadn't cleaned out that shelf. Well anyways Josh my current bf and I was cleaning and he found them. He is not the type of person that would get jealous over that at all. He made a joke about them and for the first time in my life I ripped them up and threw them away. I think that is how I def knew I have found the one since I could do that.

[pinkaurora]

"The Ex" I deleted a ton of pictures with him and I but while looking at pictures I still find some from time to time. I mean we were together for almost a  decade for crying out loud and I thought I would spend forever with him. I tried to delete ones with just the two of us (excluding pictures from one of my best friends wedding, i mean i looked damn good and Natalie is only getting married once!). He is in the back ground of some of the family pictures and videos Christmas, thanksgiving, cook outs and such but those stayed. Those have others in them and are about family. . . not really "us". As far as gifts go, even though we were together a substantial amount of time he didn't really buy me much. I kept the care bear he bought me when we first started hanging out and the few pieces of jewelry (a necklace and a pair of earrings ) even though I never wear them.

[fingerpaints]

I just realized I have a card from my most recent ex she wrote to me after we broke up. I never actually read it, just put it away in case I had to do something about her as by that stage she had turned into a stalker. I would have tossed it in the trash otherwise. Im still holding onto it as I still get the odd text from her, the most recent inviting me over to meet "the new fiancé and love of her life" which in itself is odd to me. They met about a week after we split up and had been together just six weeks :S she is all shades of crazy

[Sprinkles]

I actually live with my ex boyfriend (long story) so my current boyfriend should be okay with anything I keep since he's fine with my current living situation That said, yes I do still have pictures of us (somewhere) but I only wear one item of jewelry he gave me (a pair of stud earrings so no big deal).

[Galactica]

I never throw out photos-  those people were a part of my life, I can't just pretend years of my life didn't happen or doesn't exist. 

Plus, a more vain reason is that these relationships happened so long ago, that I look quite cute and thin to my older, more plump self.  So I keep them around as evidence that I was, in fact, quite cute once.  Ah well.

Probably helps that my wife is not the jealous sort

[Silver Glade]

If it was a bad relationship, all the stuff gets sold/donated or returned to the person. Otherwise, I think it's worth keeping as long as it doesn't stir up bad emotions.

^^^ This!  When I got out of a toxic four-year relationship a few years ago, I threw all of the gifts/mementos/etc. in a box and mailed it to him.  Both a symbolic gesture and a convenient way of clearing some space - all that stuff was his problem now. 

[DemureGirl]

I have two toys that I was given by a boy I dated. I don't consider him as a boyfriend though as I never thought of him more than a friend (much to his sadness, he'd pined for me for a while). I also have a photo of us from when we went to the swimming pool and that's it. I've not told my boyfriend because I don't want him to feel awkward. The toys are non descript and the photo is, to me, that of friends smiling and having fun.

My bf on the other hand was in a seven year relationship before me so had much more in terms of mementos. I fell for him hard while he was still not fully over his ex so photographs and the like really affected me badly. He was always loving towards me but I couldn't help feel jealous whenever I saw a photo of her (to be fair, he never had anything out but he had a suitcase filled with photos and things which I always felt my stomach turn when I saw it.).

Now I don't mind. I know he loves me, we've bought a new house together and are happy. Pretty sure he has binned a lot of the photos since but even if he hasn't I don't mind.

[Dawn]

I've thought about this for a bit and I think I only own two gifts given to me by previous boyfriends. One is a navy blue scarf and the other is a children's plastic ring that the guy stole for me from a pound shop (kinda weird I know..)

Both of the things are from relationships I had when I was a teenager, and they remind me more of a fun time in my life than of the people who gave them to me, so I guess that's why I keep them (plus the scarf is actually pretty stylish )