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Author Topic: Ok I hope I am just upset and paranoid...  (Read 2893 times)

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Offline maycrestmom

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Ok I hope I am just upset and paranoid...
« on: August 13, 2020, 03:07:35 PM »
Of all the variety of ebay experiences this has to be my saddest/weirdest to date - and that is speaking of thousands of transactions over a decade from all over the world even as I now have transactions stuck in the Philippines and Argentina due to all the covid-mess. 

So I will preface with saying I get these are not normal times but my recent ebay "win-not" for an ice crystal mountain boy that I was looking forward to rehabbing /removing the pindot mold just takes the proverbial cake.

I don't like to think this negatively about people but my gut is screaming that something just ain't right about how this transaction evolved so I am posting here as a warning to the pony-community that if you see this item pop up on a facebook or pinterest or instagram or twitter brag than I hope that person was also investigated by ebay for shady dealings with this seller for buying privately and abusing the auction rules.

I get this item is sought after.  I totally regret selling my mountain boy set for like $500 earlier this year so I am now slowly re-purchasing, and yes I am paying more than I sold mine for... although I have to admit I am stunned at the over $300 asking requests but anyway,

so my account is shoppergrrrl on ebay ( I know, dumb, but it was over a decade ago...)

Before bidding I asked if they would consider shipping internationally and when the seller replied essentially "yes" I was over the moon happy so I admit I didn't read the reply carefully I was just happy they would ship to America.  At the time when the reply stated I should "put in my offer" I kinda read into that answer that they had alot of other buyer inquiries and perhaps offers they were considering instead of just running the auction. 

So I put in my bid for I think like 125 GBP and started the auction...

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So I ended up being the only bidder (since I also put in a last minute bid so I wouldn't be sniped as sometimes can happen)

I come to find this item in my purchase column and I am super excited to have ice crystal for a reasonable amount and as I said I was fine to look to do the boiling water, peroxide treatment to get rid of his pindot mold and so forth...

and so I pay for him and didn't even think about the fact that the seller listing was for free shipping. 


Then I read my messages :





Post Merge: August 13, 2020, 03:31:23 PM

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so to me, this reply made no sense but I figured that I could work with this seller they would just have to use ebay support to send me an invoice for shipping.  I figured, worst case, is they would refund me my first payment so they could add in the royal mail charges and then I would repay, OR I would just send them the added 15-20 GBP through paypal.  So to me, it was no big deal.

Than I got the claim they are "shielding due to covid" and can only supposedly use a Hermes carrier.

Now come on, we have plenty of other UK sellers who know how pitney bowes works with ebay/paypal and regular carriers are doing a fantastic job to keep the economy going while also dealing with covid

I totally was not prepared for what followed
« Last Edit: August 13, 2020, 03:31:23 PM by maycrestmom »
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Re: Ok I hope I am just upset and paranoid...
« Reply #1 on: August 13, 2020, 03:50:16 PM »
oh no.  this doesn't sound good. 
:( 
it's so very sad that most people don't know the ins and outs of international shipping.
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Offline maycrestmom

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Re: Ok I hope I am just upset and paranoid...
« Reply #2 on: August 13, 2020, 04:10:23 PM »
so the seller just up and cancels my transaction and then makes excuses to the point of saying I wouldn't want the item it's in bad shape and then the icing on weirdness cake was than asking if it was ok if in the future they sold, could they contact me

again, so against ebay policy



So look, I was hoping that perhaps I could contact a pony-peep here to help me out as my UK-pony connection if I had to have this seller mail only locally, but I don't think that is happening at all now

I reported to ebay to have them look into all the seller's correspondence for this item

I don't do facebook or social media so if folks here do and make those connections, than feel free to do so

I have a really stressful job that this MLP-stuff is supposed to be an enjoyable hobby.  And 99.999% of the time I meet the most wonderful, helpful, kind and just awesome people and it has been fun rehabbing and rehoming MLP through the years. 

What started as a way to beat loneliness with 3 little ones at home has grown into a toy-ministry on the side where we partner with services to get kids stuffed animals and other essentials when dealing with family crisis stuff (and don't get me started about our future needs ... that's a white rabbit hole )

So bottom line is thanks for reading this long missive and just know that I love the pony community and all the folks in it as broken as we all are in sometimes dealing with competition and desire for that "score" that I have always most loved believing that the metaphor of how we can always find the good in a thrown away object and with a bit of elbow grease  (and sometimes chemistry) we can restore and refresh these guys to show that they aren't junk and I love the memories of a happy childhood that truly captured that in-the-moment-joy of play that so often can allude us

so anyhow, enough philosophy, I just hope no one in this community was conspiring with this particular seller and I hope this seller never treats another buyer the way I was treated 'cause it sucked

so end of the day, I am still now looking for an ice crystal, a lightening and a fireball

so wish me some ponyluck as man, this was not a fun experience

Post Merge: August 13, 2020, 04:28:24 PM

oh no.  this doesn't sound good. 
:( 
it's so very sad that most people don't know the ins and outs of international shipping.

I sincerely hope it was simply a misunderstanding of international shipping... but when they claimed they would keep the pony and let child play with it I pointed out that they just found out it was an over hundred value item, and there are perfectly good modern MLP toys for kids to play with... so yes, I could so be just paranoid and I don't like to think so negatively but this whole mess just seems more like

they are selling to get the max they can since - pandemic and hard times.  Buyers have offers higher than mine before the auction starts so there is that connection and then there is the obvious that ebay is not the only selling platform

ah well... it is what it is, just when dealing with genuine sellers we work it out so win-win and everyone is happy and that is not at all how this transaction went down.

I could be wrong, but man, not at all how I was expecting to be treated.   I have also been a seller in a similar situation and had to work with ebay to remove that GSP mess and the buyer was great while we got it all straightened out ... so I didn't think I was coming across as pressuring them to do anything other than be a normal ebay seller

dunno
« Last Edit: August 13, 2020, 04:28:24 PM by maycrestmom »
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Offline banditpony

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Re: Ok I hope I am just upset and paranoid...
« Reply #3 on: August 13, 2020, 04:31:47 PM »
I'm sorry your transaction didn't work out. I wouldn't worry about it too much -- there will be another Ice Crystal and maybe you can get a better deal.

It's hard to make comments about this situation since it's only one side of the story. But I will say, sometimes it's just better for transactions to be ended if both sides are getting uncomfortable.

ETA:
It was their fault for not having the proper shipping on there. But if they originally didn't have international shipping, sometimes they can't go back and change that if there is a bid, or it's too close to the auction ending.
« Last Edit: August 13, 2020, 04:34:01 PM by banditpony »
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Offline Taffeta

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Re: Ok I hope I am just upset and paranoid...
« Reply #4 on: August 13, 2020, 06:17:29 PM »
That's not a realistic shipping price from the UK to the US via Royal Mail for an item valued at 90£.

Just saying, as someone who has used the system for years shipping from the UK, that's a serious hike.

Even with full insurance for a single pony you aren't looking at £40. £20-£25 perhaps. But not £40.

https://www.royalmail.com/price-finder

A useful guide ^^.

TBH I don't think it's a viable price for courier either, though I admit I have never used a courier to ship abroad.

ETA - looking at Hermes it's closer to 30£ for a parcel of roughly pony size and weight. More than I thought but not as much as you were quoted.

On the subject of shielding I'm an expert, having been through that process here for a 4 month block. I have had to shut down all trades and sales because of shielding with my mother. It's not that POs etc are not open, it's just the risk aspect. If they genuinely were shielding, though, putting things on ebay is not really a good idea. So like you I have some doubts but it's not impossible.

Let me just add that the risk factor of having parcels collected/doing a courier service is not realistic for someone shielding. Courier services have been pretty good through the crisis, and have all kinds of protective rules in place. But if you are genuinely shielding, selling a pony on ebay is probably not top of your to do list.

In any case, that's a bit academic, based on your screen grab of the transaction.

Shielding ended in the UK on August 1st for the time being. Your screen grab says the 12th.  As this transaction was after that date, then there isn't really an argument (although as I said, we've been shielding because of Mum and we're still not going to the PO yet.). So that's also likely to be a lie. It feels like they're taking advantage of you being international and assuming you won't know that.

There are some localised lockdowns here but I am not aware of Southwold being one of those areas, and more, local lockdown does not = shielding, which was universally paused regardless. (My personal views on that are entirely separate to this thread xD)

On the final point - if you ever have a situation like that and need a Uk person, feel free to give me a poke. Just so long as you know in the immediate timeframe we are still being super cautious and shielding may apply to us going forward again if the UK spikes. :) But if you don't mind having your pony taking a break for a month or two before making its long journey, you can always drop me a Pm and I can try and help.

It sort of seems to me like maybe there was a higher private offer after the auction, they tried to get the hike from you in shipping, and then ultimately accepted the other person's offer instead.
« Last Edit: August 13, 2020, 06:26:08 PM by Taffeta »
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Offline pinkkittywinks

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Re: Ok I hope I am just upset and paranoid...
« Reply #5 on: August 13, 2020, 06:55:24 PM »
Hermes shipping to the US with tracking and the correct insurance is about £40-£45 :) I have shipped to the US via Hermes quite recently :) It is worth noting that Hermes prices can vary DRAMACTICALLY depending on where you are shipping :)

Royal Mail shipping is about £15 with tracking and the correct insurance.

Shielding has been paused, not ended, so unless they have been ordered otherwise or it is due to local lockdown it is possible for them to visit the shops if needed. My Mum has been shielding, but still doesn't want to risk going out and we have been staying in to protect her. I am also in an area of increased restrictions due to a spike in cases. As far as I know, the place where the seller is located is not an area of increased restrictions or local lock down.

I hope you can get things resolved :hug:

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Re: Ok I hope I am just upset and paranoid...
« Reply #6 on: August 13, 2020, 07:00:50 PM »
Hermes shipping to the US with tracking and the correct insurance is about £40-£45 :) I have shipped to the US via Hermes quite recently :) It is worth noting that Hermes prices can vary DRAMACTICALLY depending on where you are shipping :)

Royal Mail shipping is about £15 with tracking and the correct insurance.

Shielding has been paused, not ended, so unless they have been ordered otherwise or it is due to local lockdown it is possible for them to visit the shops if needed. My Mum has been shielding, but still doesn't want to risk going out and we have been staying in to protect her. I am also in an area of increased restrictions due to a spike in cases. As far as I know, the place where the seller is located is not an area of increased restrictions or local lock down.

I hope you can get things resolved :hug:

Love pkw xxx



Really?

Then I guess there's cause behind that quote. All right, maybe I'm being too harsh on them for that xD I checked for the US but didn't check all the insurance options.

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Offline banditpony

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Re: Ok I hope I am just upset and paranoid...
« Reply #7 on: August 13, 2020, 08:05:40 PM »
My thoughts are the Hermes location could be more easily accessible to the seller then their local post..? (like, maybe they have to get on a bus for the post?)

Everyone has their own individual health risks during this pandemic.. and I think as a whole, we all need to respect each other and what people are comfortable with when it comes to their lives.
(ETA: I don't mean for this comment to use shielding as an excuse. Only personal safety.)

As I said, it was completely wrong for the shipping info to be omitted in the first place, and had the seller properly added that info in the auction I feel like there wouldn't of been the confusion. That's why I mentioned I don't think you can change the shipping price after there is a bid.

The screenshot doesn't seem so off. The seller wanted to send an invoice... and OP seemed ok with paying  for shipping but ONLY for Royal Mail, and not Hermes.

So I think both parties were uncomfortable... which is why it got canceled.

Maybe the comment about if they sold it later meant if they felt like they could get to the post safely in the future.
« Last Edit: August 13, 2020, 09:23:47 PM by banditpony »
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Re: Ok I hope I am just upset and paranoid...
« Reply #8 on: August 13, 2020, 08:26:55 PM »
There is an option to have hermes collect from the home, I just find it weird that you'd be using that as a default shipping system for ebay auctions for plastic ponies if you were shielding. But eh, whatever. There's the fact that the UK postage was free shipping which makes it hard to fathom out what service they would have been using within the UK.

I also don't want what I said about shielding to be twisted into a discussion on judging someone else's health decisions. It's nothing to do with that.

You can choose not to go to the PO after shielding ends, for perfectly valid reasons. But saying that you are shielding implies that there are restrictions on you on a wider national level which are no longer the case.  And even if there are real health concerns, it's not morally right imo to imply that you 'can't' go to a PO and thus 'must' charge a higher rate because of something that's no longer technically true.

It's also something that you should probably advise a buyer of before they bid.

And it doesn't explain the abrupt end of the transaction since I didn't get the sense the OP didn't want to pay the shipping. That's a real red flag imo.

Royal Mail would indeed require a post office trip, probably. You can print the thing online and pay for it that way, but it's not quite like the USPS in that regard.

I think it would be possible to add a shipping cost to an auction after a bid was placed but probably not in the bidding price category. More as a note at the bottom for buyers to see. I think that option still exists. Though ebay would ignore it when it came to invoicing.

Oh yeah, final note. I should also mention that I have been in this scenario as a buyer (not same seller) who 'sold' me an item and then randomly refunded me and refused to explain why, made lots of excuses, and it turned out their image was stolen. I don't know the circs behind it but it really upset me when it happened.

The thing is, if a seller has an issue, the best thing is honesty and transparency. A buyer cannot understand what the situation is unless that happens. And to me there are too many gaps in this. Though it could genuinely just come down to not wanting to ship overseas/the hassle of doing so.
« Last Edit: August 13, 2020, 08:48:30 PM by Taffeta »
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Offline maycrestmom

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Re: Ok I hope I am just upset and paranoid...
« Reply #9 on: August 13, 2020, 11:59:46 PM »
I so appreciate the feedback taffeta as yeah I consider you and PKW my two UK-based pony experts on so many levels and if I can salvage this botched communication / transaction I will be possibly in a place to make sure that they are ok with shipping to UK and then I don't mind it at all if the item sits a month more (we have our own issues  in US awaiting september 17th silliness) it would just be wonderful to me to have  ice crystal and I don't mind his project / rehab status

so yeah,  I am trying to hopefully work through their concerns as to shielding/shipping and I'll see how it goes as now they just wrote back some more.  I don't mean this thread to sound one-sided

so thanks for helping as a sounding board as I know my asperger-logical mentality can so miss empathizing with what is really going on when I take things too personally and this is as banditpony pointed out only a toy and yep, there will be another ice crystal auction another day

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Offline banditpony

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Re: Ok I hope I am just upset and paranoid...
« Reply #10 on: August 14, 2020, 01:02:44 AM »
I don't mean this thread to sound one-sided

Don't worry about it sounding one sided, it's your story after all. It's totally weird, and a shame.

I was just trying to fill in the blanks.. based on the hermes 40GBP comment but you saying 15-20 GBP for Royal Mail, and then the random cancelation.

It could just as well be someone who changed their mind, a scam, or whatever..
« Last Edit: August 14, 2020, 01:04:33 AM by banditpony »
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Re: Ok I hope I am just upset and paranoid...
« Reply #11 on: August 14, 2020, 03:43:26 PM »
:hug:

It is always the right thing to ask if you feel unsure about something :bigups: I don't think it is you either :hug:

If I hadn't been using Hermes myself, the amount quoted would have concerned me as it is a BIG difference. I had never used Hermes myself until lockdown ^.^ I have always used Royal Mail, even when I worked for a mail order company we used Royal Mail.

I don't think the seller has thought things through before they listed Ice Crystal for sale.

Love pkw xxx

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Re: Ok I hope I am just upset and paranoid...
« Reply #12 on: August 28, 2020, 01:18:44 AM »
My first thought was also that Hermes was perhaps the only shipper that would pick up from the home.  I don't know if that's accurate since I don't live in the UK, though.

Personally I am not going to the PO (or anywhere else I don't absolutely have to, lol) until there's a safe and proven vaccine for COVID.  Why tempt fate, you know?  Fortunately the US postal service will pick up packages from your house, which is really convenient.

I'm really sorry you didn't get Ice Crystal this time, but maybe you'll find an even cheaper on who doesn't have pindot. :)
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Offline maycrestmom

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Re: Ok I hope I am just upset and paranoid... happy ending thankfully!
« Reply #13 on: September 02, 2020, 10:30:50 PM »
  :biggrin: Happy update - thanks to the amazing agreement and help by PKW I was able to get back in touch with the sellers to confirm that the only issue was about the shipping and they were fine with them mailing ice crystal locally.  So he's safely under quarantine awaiting his transatlantic flight - yippee!   :happy:

So boy was that a roller coaster ride that fortunately has a happy ending :-)

so yep, I own a bit of a project MB, but he's clean-able, and I am thankful he was just an average price (as much as I realize these guys are popular, those $300 amounts are scaring me coming from my $50-$100 mindset)

I cannot be more thankful for the support here thru this thread and through the arena in general in allowing me to question my perspective while validating my feelings cause yeah, it just sucks to have the whole covid-mess creating it's own chaotic layer through all the regular ebay misunderstandings

(and honestly IMO there won't be a "proven" vaccine for "covid-19" since the SARS-COV-2 class virus continually evolves and mutates ... but that is a microbiology discussion for another day)

so I just wanted to put in a   :tackleglomp: huge huge huge bunch of pony hugs for ya'll and send a   :hearts: huge round of thank you-s as I have been able to find a work-around for this shipping hassle created between the US and euro-markets using the various ebay platforms all thanks to arena-folk here :-)

so yeah there will be brag threads to follow once MLPs have safely hopped the pond...

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Re: Ok I hope I am just upset and paranoid...
« Reply #14 on: September 02, 2020, 10:38:40 PM »
Yay :D So glad you figured out a solution <3
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