Finding something for myself

[kariokii28]

Hi everyone, I’m Sarah. I’m from New Hampshire, and turned 35 this past Fall - and that’s when EVERYTHING changed for me...

I’m a mother of two: one is  an 11 year old girl who I just gained full custody of after a two year long court battle kicked off by her father hitting her in the face so hard she went to the hospital; she’s got PTSD and suicidal thoughts at times. The other is a five year old boy who loves rainbows and kittens and glitter and pink, but is now struggling a little with his interests due to other boys in kindergarten saying those aren’t “boy” things.
    I gave birth at age 23, meaning most of my young and crazy days were spent being a single mother. At age 23 I stopped growing as a person, and just became a Mom, which I love 💕
    This past summer I had some health issues, and became worried I was going through early menopause; the realization that I may not be able to have the third child I’d been planning for devastated me. Accepting that was hard...
    My son started kindergarten in the Fall, leaving me home by myself for the first time in 12 years. I was losing my identity as a parent, and had no idea who I was anymore, without needing to take care of my kids all day... I needed something for me - something that was only mine, and I didn’t have to share with anyone else in my home. My hubby collects Magic the Gathering cards and works on his Subarus; my son collects Hot Wheels and loves Roblox; my daughter collects Littlest Pet Shop and loves anime - and I had nothing of my own.
    When I was a child, ponies were my life. My Little Pony, Fantasy Fillies, Little Beauties, Breyer, Fairy Tails, Lady Lovely Locks, original Littlest Pet Shop... I took excellent care of my belongings, and managed to save most of everything into adulthood - until I lost it all to black mold from a flood in the basement at age 26. I lost almost everything (over $1,500 in ponies alone).
    Ponies were something that I, and only I, love, that I could do for myself to find peace. Replace lost ponies, clean the few I saved, learn how to repair, and collect new ones I always wanted as a child.
    So just before my 35th birthday last October, I joined a G1 group on Facebook, and began collecting again.
    I’ll be 36 this year, and buying, cleaning, repairing, trading, collecting, and selling ponies is my happiness - something that’s mine, and only mine, and brings me joy, something to take care of, and small goals to achieve at my own pace. I wake up every day with a smile on my face, as I now know who I am again, and what I love.

Thank you all for welcoming me!

[LadyAmalthea]

I can relate...my story is very similar to yours. Both with the identity crisis of being a mom and feeling like everything you do is for and about someone else, and needing to find your own thing, and also finding out that most of my childhood ponies were lost in a flood as well and trying to rehab what is left, and replace what is gone (check out my introduction post right before yours if you are up for a long read 

Sorry about what happened to your daughter; that's horrible that someone she loves and trusts would do that to her. Your son would probably be friends with mine...he's 4 1/2 and loves all things girly and princess-related--he currently insists on being called 'Elsa' and tries a blanket around his waist, pretending it's a dress.

I hope you find peace with your collecting and repairing...it has helped me a lot! 

[Ponybookworm]

Welcome aboard!!! I hate the way children as young as 5 can believe things are "boy" things or "girl" things, & I hate how some mothers insist on their boy children sticking to "boy" things. Things don't have to have genders so well done you for supporting your son xxx

As I said to Lady Amalthea, floods aren't good for Ponies!!! Though my own childhood collection wasn't lost to flood, it was lost to something else unpleasant, & I've had to work on getting it back, so huggles there too xxx

Here's hoping you get your childhood collection replaced, & have fun along the way xxx

[IceCrystal02]

Welcome to the Arena Sarah!

I can relate, the only "girl toys" I fancied as a girl were MLP,  other than that, I threw that stupid doll that wet itself and the one Barbie I owned in a corner when I received them and preferred playing with my train set, my train guard play set (whistle, dispatch baton, hat and guard's bag), my post office play set or going skateboarding.  Thankfully, nobody judged me for that though, just most train guards used to ask for "the boy's ticket" as I had very short hair as a girl.

I hope your son can withstand the other boys' remarks and stay true to his interests. 

[Spinky69er]

Welcome to the Arena

I'm glad that you have rediscovered something that brings joy into your life again and that you can collect for yourself

Hope you have a wonderful time here on the forum!

[Mewtwofan1]

Welcome! I hope you have a wonderful time here, finding and sharing your ponies.

[achab1984]

Welcome to the arena!

I know how your feeling! I had my daughter at the age of 19 and she is 16 now! She is growing up way to fast! 

[Loa]

Welcome to the craziness that is the Arena!