Honeymoon fund as an alternative to a wedding list...

[Artemesia's Garden]

Hi ponies, I'm getting married soon but we don't really need any stuff. However, people have asked about gifts so I thought maybe we could set up a 'just giving type page for our honeymoon so people could choose to donate a bit of cash if they want to. What do you think? Do you know of a website we could use?

[SnorkMaiden]

My mum's friend's daughter got married last weekend, and they asked for donations for their honeymoon (as an alternative to wedding gifts, not instead of them). I don't think they had a website, though - I think people just gave them cash on the day.

[melodys_angel]

I don't know if id actually list for a honeymoon, but that's me.

Maybe just say that your company is a gift and just tell a few close people that you could use the money---word should get around without it feeling...you know?

[Artemesia's Garden]

I don't know if id actually list for a honeymoon, but that's me.

Maybe just say that your company is a gift and just tell a few close people that you could use the money---word should get around without it feeling...you know?

I think people want to give us something. I tried to ask people not to give me 40th birthday presents but I just got a load of plants and things I had nowhere to put them.

We kinda don't need the money, we're DIYing most of our wedding but we're just being careful and don't want to get into debt at the beginning of our lives together. We are in our late 30s so we already have plenty of spoons and stuff.

This is helpful though. Maybe a website option would seem tacky. Why wouldn't you list for a honeymoon? Does it seem a bit frivolous? Steve's never been abroad and we're so short of time together.

My mum's friend's daughter got married last weekend, and they asked for donations for their honeymoon (as an alternative to wedding gifts, not instead of them). I don't think they had a website, though - I think people just gave them cash on the day.

Cool it's good to know that other people are thinking along the same lines, but I'm just not sure about accepting cash from people. It's tricky

 

[Beldarna]

Asking for money towards the honeymoon happens quite often around here. Johns is a photographer so our gift is usually that he takes their weddingpictures for free, but I know of at least three couples who asked for honeymoon cash .

[Taxel]

Its getting more and more common to have a honeymoon fund instead of a registry, but I've seen a lot of people say that some of their guests ignored or were uncomfortable with the fund. They either asked what the couple needed/wanted or bought entirely random things the couple had no use/space for. I'd suggest having a small registry, even if its not the typical wedding registry stuff, in case you have any guests like that.


As a sidenote the Wedding Planning sub on Reddit was a HUGE help when I was planning a wedding and I highly recommend it! Most of the wedding communities I found (forums and FB) were kind of... weird? Judgmental? I'm not sure how to put it exactly, but r/weddingplanning was the chillest and most helpful one for me personally. Just in case that might help you out

[Artemesia's Garden]

Its getting more and more common to have a honeymoon fund instead of a registry, but I've seen a lot of people say that some of their guests ignored or were uncomfortable with the fund. They either asked what the couple needed/wanted or bought entirely random things the couple had no use/space for. I'd suggest having a small registry, even if its not the typical wedding registry stuff, in case you have any guests like that.


As a sidenote the Wedding Planning sub on Reddit was a HUGE help when I was planning a wedding and I highly recommend it! Most of the wedding communities I found (forums and FB) were kind of... weird? Judgmental? I'm not sure how to put it exactly, but r/weddingplanning was the chillest and most helpful one for me personally. Just in case that might help you out

Asking for money towards the honeymoon happens quite often around here. Johns is a photographer so our gift is usually that he takes their weddingpictures for free, but I know of at least three couples who asked for honeymoon cash .

It's great that you always have a good option on hand! Thanks that's good to know.

I had a look at online and I'm really struggling to find an online registry system based in the UK that would work. I kinda like the stuff I already have and it does feel strange asking people for household items. I planned our wedding myself without referring to stuff online much because I kinda guessed it might not be my style and I didn't want to get lots of adverts.

Thank you I'll have a look on reddit as well. Thank you yes that is helpful.

[reddsetgogirl]

I think a nice way to phrase it was how a friend of mine did.  She set it up as a “buy us a meal” while they honeymooned.  This meant some people were gifting them a fine dining experience while others paid for a more modest but still enjoyable dinner.  It was a way for people to give them a memory and feel included without it coming across as them wanting their honeymoon paid for, etc.

You will always have traditionalists who would prefer to give a physical gift.  In that case, I would consider making a registry of not things you don’t have, as most living together couples have that well and truly covered by the time they marry but rather upgrading things you have to something nicer/more modern.  Likewise, “experience” gifts are popular, anything from spa treatments for two to hot air ballon rides.

[Aflame]

well I'm going to do that as me and my OH have been living together for ages and don't need any stuff so we are going to have a honeymoon fund instead

[dragonfly]

I used to hear that it's tacky and a faux pas, but there are sites dedicated to that specifically so evidently it's quite popular. I'd contribute to one if one of my friends set one up as their gift. Not really any different than buying off a registry.

[Artemesia's Garden]

Yeah I think weddings can be kinda tacky whichever way you look at it but the fact is we already have loads of stuff between us, so what on earth to do? Well here is what I wrote in the end, not in the invitaitions but in the 'Practical Guide'

Gifts
Steve and I have been very touched by the enquiries about gifts. We are very thankful for the support of both our families and all our friends. Your presence at our wedding is gift enough however if you do wish to make a gesture, we would be more than pleased to accept donations to our honeymoon fund. It might be a while before we are able to go away, but we will send postcards to let everyone know how we get on.

Ta da. Too late to change it now lol